What kind of weapons would you use to defeat a vampire?
Keep in mind that vampire are very intelligent and cunning so typical tricks like throwing garlic at them might not work the way you think they will.
What kind of weapons would you use to defeat a vampire?
My dick.
She sucks both your cum and your blood from your dick. What now?
>inb4 "I see this as an absolute win"
oh no how awful
I NEED to stick my dick in there
Fricks sake /k/, I visit here again for the first time in months and you buggers give me an insatiable need for vampiric dicky. You bastards never stop .
get more blood from a blood bank and let her suck more cum out of me
I don't know why people ever ask what is the best weapon to kill x when the answer is so obvious. It's literally always the same answer.
Congrats, you are now yupiel’s sex toy for eternity
oh no that's terrible haha
nothing can beat the dick
the wood goes in the heart, aim higher next time
>Through dick…unity.
Please review the attached evidence, your honor.
She kills them on the next page, you know.
lol, no she doesn't
She does.
That's the last panel of the doujin, it ends with her and her friend getting dicked until they're mind broken.
what manga?
https://exhentai.org/g/751714/b8ea0bc4bc
119298
VAMPIRE KISS
homie looks like he sells apples for 10 emeralds each
Counterevidence:
It says right there she has no idea what she is talking about.
She still won though.
How am I supposed to know that what you've said it's true? Am I supposed to just believe you on your word?
Actually, don't prove me wrong, judging by your image at least one of us could get in trouble.
https://nhentai.net/g/388788/
I now rest my case.
>No e-girlcon tag
Not interested.
Anon Wendy is in the second half of that doujin.
Not e-girl, so I don't care.
https://exhentai.org/g/1086337/46098bd51a/
>hey mister
>do you want to have taco bell?
Damn, I haven't done the panda bypass on my phone, gotta wait until I get home to do research on your link.
Why are you attracted to cartoon depictions of underage girls?
Because I'm attracted to underage girls.
Cringe? Nope, not this time. This one was based.
Pretty cringe if you ask me.
Pretty sure he didn't.
good thing no one did
I did
Not that anon, but I just really like tiny girls and it's hard to find lewd stuff focusing on adult ones, so I fap to doujins about unnaturally mature e-girls instead.
There is no shame in appreciating the dicky, anon. Just embrace what you are, you'll be happier for it and I will call you brother.
I'm into the look but not the rest, even as a fantasy. Tiny flat hairless girls are hot as frick but I like my girls sexually mature and perverted as hell, and I'm very well-endowed to the point that even average-sized adult girls struggle with so even in a fantasy world I don't think sex with a e-girl would be enjoyable with either of us. I'll stick to chasing after petite adults and fapping to out of context 2d e-girl stuff that I can pretend is just petite stuff.
You're into little girls, but you feel apprehensive about raping and/or hurting someone. Congratulations, you're normal.
>He doesn't know
Lol
Sauce me up dude.
Mmm, sleepy time...
Someone didn't read the book
tolkien drew that gay boy
silver coated dick
>silver coated dick
How would werewolf girls defeat him?
condom
this dudes living proof that widowmaker could be real, and it’s an absolute crime that no woman has stepped up to the plate
>have English-speaking French supermodel-tier gf
>show her porn of widowmaker and
>silver coated dick
How does a woman who can have any man on the planet proceed from here?
he died in 2013
some women have also been blued, though not for cosmetic purposes
Where can one encounter a six quadrillion year old vampire e-girl? Asking to know what areas to avoid, of course.
They appear to be quite common in Japan.
>Where can one encounter a six quadrillion year old vampire e-girl?
Styria.
Steyr Arms, beautiful landscapes, and vampire e-girls ?
Northern Slovenians are blessed
>Styria.
I am literally there, where are they???
Head to your nearest castle. Castles are always lousy with vampires.
>cook homemade garlic bread to knock them unconscious
>proceed with rape
The power of love I have been slowly acquiring for over thirty years.
you could also just use your wizard magic
silver buckshot, expensive but one accurate shot and its over
you could cast your own for about $25 a shot plus ~$100 in setup costs. not to pricey for killing the immortal I think
A brick
OP gets a bricking too
The holy brick knows no limits, fueled by the autistic hate that one man has for all demons. Truly, a weapon to surpass metal gear
Electronic weaponry such as Lasers and microwave weapons.
or just irradiate her body to the point that all of their chromosomes are torn apart
the triple shot cross is my go to.
They're weak to alcohol.
>vamps have hypersensitive taste buds
>they can't handle strong tastes like spirit alcohol, flamin' hot chilli, or sour candy
>the most readily available such flavor to the medieval euro peasant was garlic which is how that legend started
>tfw I may be a vampire
can you be defeated by this guy's dick?
This dumb fricking machine gun. I need to go beat persica before she builds another one of these dumb dolls
This show was really underrated. I hope we get another season at some point
PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP
GET PREGANT GET PREGNANT GET PREGANANT
a brick on a string
Maybe a hollowpoint-like cartridge with a capsule of holy water, garlic, or other vamp inimical compound within. Does artificial sunlight still hurt them?
α-neurotoxin injections
because vampires don't have a heartbeat, it won't kill them or damage them - it isn't cytotoxic, so it won't damage cells.
what it will do, however, is irreversibly paralyze the rest of their musculature
>What kind of weapons would you use to defeat a vampire?
ch-checked
Only works on vampires where the author of the setting decides UM ACKSHUALLY THEY ARE A SEPERATE SPECIES OR CAUSED BY A VIRUS , or some other stupid nonsense. Not real ass vampires like say the ones in VTMB, where you have someone try just that on your PC, and you can just walk right up to him and kill him.
The idea of vampires being killed by sunlight only goes back to the 1920s after the movie Nosferatu
Older vamps were completely unaffected by the sun.
vtm vamps can sent into an uncontrollable fear state with a lit cigarette
How/why?
Part of the curse put on Cain, the first vampire in VtM, by the Archangel Michael was a weakness and fear of both sunlight and fire. He’s right that even a lot cigarette could potentially trigger it but the vampire would have to fail a very easy check to succumb to something that minor.
RAPE!!!!!
I'd take advantage of the vampire's compulsive need to count
Vampire e-girls never expect the sunflower seed trick.
check’d
zamn
Witnessed
"TAUFLEDERMAUS is typing..."
if anyone could load a bullet with a good wooden stake it's that man
Crucifix Glitch. Or some heavily modified post-human hippie.
I'm still mad the scientist dude didn't frick the vampire at the end of the second book.
I 100% would have tried to frick Valerie, imagine the fear boner, imagine the insane nut you wold bust
she could pick you up just like a rag doll and use you to frick herself
stabbing in the head with a robot seems to work as well
How would vampires reproduce? Do they go into heat or does a male just have to get horny enough and tackle a female to the ground.
Vampires don't have the biological functions or urges of humans, they reproduce by first draining their progeny completely and then putting in a drop of their own vitae. That's the Embrace.
Although per the latest rules there's a theoretical possibility that a cainite with high enough humanity retains their biological functions, so you could make an argument that they are able to reproduce normally. I would probably allow it if you also were in Golconda, but that's obviously up to your storyteller.
Those are VtM vampires, I was talking about Blindsight vampires, which are paleolithic mutant humans. They supposedly wig out in the presence of each other and usually communicate by sound, out of sight.
That sounds gay, just use the VtM rules.
They really are different things, the only overlap is the reality that in a world where AI and vampires coexist, Humanity is doomed.
But vampires need humanity to survive.
Doomed in a more aspirational sense, depending on how you view the future of AI. If you think AI would take over and gradually move humans onto reservations, then all that changes is that the reservations are also farms. If you don't think AI would do that, it'd be a big deal if they figured out vampires exist and are much better agents than humans.
I want to be a farm animal for a cute e-girlpire like Yupiel...
Being a pet too glamorous?
I don't deserve such a high position in the hierarchy.
What about being a e-girlpire's living furniture?
The Tzimisce way eh? Sure, that works for me!
I'd like to think that even super intelligent terrifying Blindsight vampires would keep some humans around as blood studs. M-maybe I could be one of those, haha.
Wait, I thought the Blindsight vampires were revealed to be actually consciousnessless? (And it was the AI that was actually in charge, keikaku^1000 style)
They *might* be unconscious in the philosophical zombie sense, only Jukko the Finngolian vampire was an AI homonculus.
There's a lot of rookie mistakes in the second book but expecting the audience to not immediately unzip dick when confronted with a dangerous vampire is probably the most obvious. It's a weird reflex found in both sexes if you think about it.
>implying he was still the scientist
I'm still somewhat convinced Valerie was into him in her own weird Vamp way and wasn't purely interested because of the portia infection. Blindsight vampires canonically fricked human men.
Agreed. The way vampires work in that setting, she would have just killed him and been done with it if she didn't explicitly want him around. What a waste.
I was on team cute vampire from like her second line and then she spent the entire rest of the book violently teasing the protagonist. Sweat was dripping off my face.
only for the author to blueball my throbbing, pulsating erection in the last chapter
for all the human nature ideas watts plays with it's baffling that he seems to not realise that everyone and their mother would want to frick the shit out the vampires.
I keep forgetting spoilers only work on like half the boards, that's really annoying.
This novel is available for free online, by the way, and Watts claims it massively increased sales of the book. His Amazon profile is also pretty fricking funny.
>crucifix glitch
only works if they aren't on Auntie-U
can also be overcome with enough mental training
Watts' vampires aren't invulnerable and magic, just super strong, fast, and intelligent, with enough firepower and the right situation you could probably take one out
the problem is getting them into that situation when they are able to think circles around you with half their brain scooped out
I mean, wasn't Valerie's whole scheme to cause enough chaos to be able to make some zombies for a shootout with the crew? Like you said, their main superpower is intelligence.
Apply zombies until problem goes away
Just got a kitten, discovered all the weird social autism of Blindsight vampires are things cats do. Little deflating. That said, it's on video that an 8-gauge can fire stakes that can break through the breastbone, to the heart.
I've got my other Buffy vampire-killing-tools at hand right at this desk: plenty of sharp pencils.
Imagine cuddlefricking her to sleep in her coffin all night, and then snoozing through the day. Heaven
brick
In which denominations of Christianity is it considered heretical to marry a vampire?
all of em
shit, Islam it is then. That also solves the polygamy issue so I can marry Flan at the same time, so it all works out.
still haram, they are like pigs (and im not talking about the xx chromos)
Worse, they're agents of Iblis. A right-believer may eat swine flesh if the alternative is starvation, but consorting with agents of the archfiend is unforgivable.
Ah you've forced my hand, guess I'm going Zoroastrian now.
Be a Buddhist and hopefully get reincarnated as a bratty vampire in need of rape correction
No, I am the corrector.
I hope you get reincarnated as a vampire hunter in an isekai harem anime.
that's the nicest thing anybody has ever said to me, thank you anon
Buddhism's main goal is to avoid reincarnation by reaching balanced karma, and by doing so reach Nirvana, which is defined as a state of complete non-existence. It's literally the ultimate suicide where your soul disintegrates into literal nothing because existence is suffering and the only way to escape it and the cycle of reincarnation is to basically do the needful offing of yourself by dividing by zero karma-wise.
t. Took Eastern Religions as an elective.
See, I've got the opposite view. Quoth TTS Vulkan "Why would I want to be dead?" "Being alive is fun, all my friends are here!"
I find it extremely ironic that all these western hippie "Buddhists" don't/can't understand the basic core concepts of what they loudly proclaim to believe in. The whole core concept of Buddhism isn't to gain good karma, it's to make supremely balanced good/bad karma so you DON'T get reincarnated and essentially vanish into nothingness. It's essentially a variant of Hinduism with an OCD balance/suicide fetish. And every dreadlocked 60-something white female "hippie" in California claims to be a Buddhist while doing/believing something that is absolutely NOTHING like actual Buddhism. Unbelievable.
>it's to make supremely balanced good/bad karma
No, it's to avoid gaining any karma whatsoever.
It is to literally have none.
Not to balance, but to be devoid of it.
>reading comprehension
>he doesn't ascribe to jodo-shinshu buddhism
ngmi
So clearly the metagame in buddhism is to do just enough good that you're born as Jeff Bezos's kids in the next life but always do a bit of evil to ensure you aren't deleted.
You've just described Hinduism, which basically says you're always going to do some evil in life somehow, so do as much good as you can so your next reincarnation is better off. Buddha himself was originally a Hindu ascetic who had a spiritual revelation (after fasting almost to death) that existence is always suffering, so it's better to avoid the reincarnation rat race by dropping out altogether via permanent spiritual suicide. Can't hurt anymore if every trace of what was ever you unravels into divide by zero nothingness.
Honestly it sounds like a LE EDGY teenager take on Hinduism. Maybe that was my Eastern Religions professor basically talking low-key shit about Buddhism though, guy was a hardcore GOOD MORNING SIRS DO NOT REDEEM and always seemed kinda butthurt over teaching undergrads about what he considered a heretical spinoff of his faith. The vibe in that course section was like a Catholic school nun being forced to teach a lecture course on Mormonism and Scientology, you could tell he didn't really approve but couldn't say it openly.
I mean, you don't exactly need to be a catholic nun to see the issues with Mormonism.
Enlightenment is realizing there is NO permanent, unchanging soul/form to disintegrate to begin with. Not in anything or anyone. All phenomenon are ultimately empty, "yourself" included. If "you" want to escape reincarnation and achieve nirvana, understand there is no thing to reincarnate into nor from. No "thing" at all. "I" cannot die, because "I" was never born. There is no "I" to begin with. And realizing that is nirvana.
Imagine there is an ice cube in a cup of water. If you distinguish, and distinguish between ice and water: when ice melts and water freezes, you will call it death and birth. If you understand that deep down, both water and ice are H2O, then you know that there is no "ice" to melt nor "water" to freeze. Just H2O changing form. Now, imagine you are that ice cube, and you sit in a cup of water the size of the universe...
What IS "ice" or "water" anyways? Just piles of H2O. And H2O is a pile of Hydrogen and Oxygen. And Hydrogen is a pile of protons and electrons (1 each). And a proton is a pile of quarks. And...
Everything is empty because everything is a composite of lesser parts, or is a part of a greater composite. But if everything is a composite or part of one, how can you call it a "thing" in itself? Ice and water is just a pile of H20. A car is a pile of metal and rubber. A table is a pile of wood and glue. A chair a pile of metal and plastic.
I am a bag of flesh and bone, why call myself, myself? The self is a pile of thoughts, beliefs, memories, experiences, desires, fears, etc. But reduce it all down into parts and the self is no more. It never was much of anything to begin with.
But if you think otherwise, and cling to form and self, death will follow you. If you know there is no thing at all, then there is no thing to die, or to be born. You don't have to negate the self, that's nihilism. Just see it as provisional, don't cling to any thing, any one, or even your "self".
shove it up your ass
You will be reborn as a buttplug
Finally somebody with an actual understanding of Buddhism shows up and saves me the trouble.
I forget is that Pepe based on the guy who brought Buddhism to China or what?
if the world is void, and nirvana is void, then nrivana can be reached through the world. Take the left hand path pill, strengthen your bonds through the world, and make yourself into being.
Yes thank you for for elucidating to the class why its just a bunch of homosexual whining and sophisms. I've never understood why anybody has respect for this crap, I suspect that the laymen who donated and still do don't actually understand the doctrine. Or slants are just wimp unwilling to stoically suffer forever. I'd rather spend my time contemplating those component parts to make a better gun, so as to expedite the unmaking of these gays so I can take their pocket change.
Basically the counter to Bhuddism is "don't care, I'm and butthole and always will be". At least gods punishing you for your transgressions derives from an authority outside yourself. There are some who aren't pussies but they are basically heretics and don't count.
Post remi 44.
ok
As an ardent Republican (in the French sense), I'm going to marry Remilia in a civil marriage after forcing her to give up her aristocratic titles.
Technically, I believe you could marry a vampire under the Greek Orthodox tradition.
Both Catholic and Protestant marriage vows include the "until death do us part" language, which would render marriage to a vampire instantly annulled by the fact that she is already dead. But the Orthodox don't have marriage vows, and instead the priest blesses the couple "to attain unto a ripe old age," which would surely be fulfilled in the case of marriage to a vampire.
I think you can make it work under the technicality that vampires can still be killed even if they are dead by definition, and therefore the concept of death and by extension 'Until Death Do Us Part' still applies to them.
I seem to remember a certain Saint taking umbrage with the verbiage, insisted it was an addition.
church of england lets you marry anyone over the age of 18 (RIP dicky gays)
>mfw I marry the 350 year old vampire e-girl (she has the body of a 7 year old)
Tractor
I think a gun would probably do it.
Take advantage of how moronic they are
Since vampires don't eat food, I'd imagine they have very clean and clear buttholes. That makes them vulnerable to anal based attacks
>That makes them vulnerable to anal based attacks
You pounce upon the e-girlpire and insert your throbbing member into her anus.
The shock of your attack causes her to clench up with hydraulic press strength and take flight, as you dangle from her sphincter.
The combination of fear and arousal causes you to c00m uncontrollably.
Your member deflates, and the shrinkage + semen slickness causes you to slip out of her. As you hurtle towards the cold ground, you let out one last defiant cry: "I regret nothing!"
>inb4 Gory Gory, What A Helluva Way To Die
WFRP 2e basically turns hunting a powerful vampire into its own whole, intense adventure. The only 'guaranteed' weaknesses are the need to feed and silver, but a high-level vampire might have any number of incredibly dangerous boons before you get into their careers and any magic ability, plus magic items. If you frick up it's going to go very badly very swiftly.
Why are so many vampires e-girls? You usually stop aging the day you're turned, so that means some kind of pedophile vampire is going around turning little girls into vampires.
Who would do this? Why?
I'm sure there's no pedopire out there turning little girls into immortal super-beings so my spawn can enjoy the fruits of forever, don't be silly
I don't see the problem???
it's the prime age for an immortal
Don't think anyone here would have to worry about Vamps since they need to be invited in and no one here leaves their house or would invite anyone into wherever they live.
If a cute e-girlbaba vampire asked me to let her into my house she wouldn't even finish the sentence before I opened the door.
unironically, fire
it just works
I invent some kinda belt fed gun that shoots garlic at vampires israeli children
a triple-barreled KSK, kek
That's for exterminating trannies, not vampires.
by far the most cursed, unholy thing in this thread is that triangular monstrosity
except maybe
i... don't think anybody noticed that anon never said anything about killing them
Im confused isn't that just a KSG? Did keltec make a triple barrel shotgun or something?
The joke here is that jap artist thought that KSK has three barrels.
oh
Are you trolling me?
That's a KSG and the two barrels at the bottom are magazine tubes
wear garlic, wear some sick silver bracelets and necklaces, put garlic on my eggs for breakfast, spaghetti with red sauce and garlic for lunch, and garlic bread as an appetizer for dinner, silver bullets dipped in garlic butter
Warding off vampires sounds very Italian, I’m in.
silver cummies
Honestly I don't see why blasting them with a 12 guage wouldnt work.
I've always loved the idea of just point blanking one in the face with an old grandpa special while people waste their time blessing this thing or forming silver from that.
>But vampires can't be killed by bulle-
I don't give a frick, he has no brain
Serious question about vampires
What counts as "sunlight"?
Is moonlight enough to kill a vampire? starlight?
Is it about the intensity? Would a uv flashlight or tanning bed kill a vampire?
Is it more about the idea of the sun?
Could you kill a vampire with a high defintion photo of the sun or a realistic holographic render of it?
It's the mystical power emitted by the heliosphere. It's direct sunlight, not moonlight, not ultraviolet light, that harms cainites. The sun actually makes kindred sleepy even if they're not directly hit by sunlight as long as the sun is up in the sky, so they can't just keep on doing vampire things in a basement somewhere.
Paintball gun, except the balls are filled with holy water. Why yes I was binge-rereading the Dresden Files over the holiday, why do you ask?
An 8 gauge paradoxal choked barrels with a stake round (finicky to load), and a brass cross buckshot with silver studs .
Sword
Garli/k hanging off my sling
Chainmail
Multiple singleshot peestols with stake
Ionised silver tincture (for my self).
Traditionally its
>stake+heart,
> sunlight,
>decapitation
that kills a Coom sucker.
Silver is just in case it werks
Garli/k is repulsive to em , crosses are scary to the degenerate Handholding succubi
bring a swasti/ka in case it's ancestors were israeli,
Bombs to open up roofs during daylight
>bring a swasti/ka in case it's ancestors were israeli
Are silver bullets considered tricks? or is that werewolves?
Trick them into a room by pretending to be a fed that's allowing the vampire to exist, but they have to be registered. Hold a discussion with them while filling out paperwork, as holy water is pumped in through the ceiling via humidifiers to weaken them.
Bring vampire to back room where the vampire is eliminated.
Thought is to do it exactly like one of those police stings where the people think they're winning a lottery and then they get arrested.
Oh no I was defeated! Now the horrifying vampire is going to rape me!
>AIDS
>Vampires live in big fancy estates
Parcel bomb
I can't imagine any reality where a vampire walks off an M79 to centre mass
Long as the grenade doesn't detonate (within minimum arming distance), it's very possible. If it can shrug off getting hit with a car, that's nothing.
My dastardly plan would be to show her kindness and warmth for the first time in her long life and to take care of her until she sees me as the only human she can trust, then gently begin flirting with her and engaging in subtle skinship until she falls in love with me, then live a long and happy life with her, having potentially up to five children (two boys, three girls) and a dozen grandchildren, then finally breathe my last breath as she tearfully clutches my hand in hers and begs me to stay, ensuring through my demise that she falls into utter despair and is never capable of summoning the strength to attack a human again.
You sick frick. I’ve seen some shit but this right here takes the cake as the most fricked up, immoral action a man could take. What next, gonna hold her fricking hand and have sex solely for procreation in a loving manner? What goes on in that twisted mind of yours anon?
in case of yupiel let her give you correctional rape in any different case eiter bullet or you do the correctional rape
nurture their desire to fit into society and be a good role model for them
Sensei should have just given in and fricked her. The sexual tension was through the roof.
Dullahan is best girl
sensei ends up fricking sensei
Hikari needed a good dicking
I volunteer
No anon, spare yourself. I shall undertake this peril
A wedding ring.
>come into thread to save cute and funny vampires
>have spiritual journey instead where I discover that Buddhism is cringe doomerpilled “existence is pain Jerry” nihilism
My belief in the permanence of the soul, and of an afterlife where you get reincarnated into a parallel multiverse is firmer than ever now
Just needs a little Wood
Underrated movie.
>cunning
UOOOOOOOOOOH
vampire
Sex. If that doesn't work, keep applying sex until it does.
I seduce the vampire
Matador fired in HESH mode
>bu-but muh immortal vampire
Doesn't matter when a blob of molten copper has just blasted an 18 inch hole through your chest
>What kind of weapons would you use to defeat a vampire?
plastic bags full of piss. you don't frick with that if you are undead
Is it rape if she's a vampire AND an elf?
Japanese vampires just have long ears.
Neither of those things have anything to do with justifying rape, and the fact that you would even ask is proof that we are right to avoid contact with humans
Rape would be unnecessary if you would only have sex with us humans voluntarily.
>we
Bloodsucker detected
>we
You will be the one getting raped.
Muh Dik
Anal raep with my expandable wooden stake
.50 Beowulf custom HE rounds. I just need a live in armorer/gunsmith to load rounds in my cool vampire hunter bunker.
nuclear weapons
vampires are weak to the sun (a star)
nuclear weapons create the same phenomena, briefly
They're weak to the Sun because the Sun represents God. Same deal with holy water. Same deal with holy crosses.
Not sure about the garlic, though.
Yahweh is a storm god, not a sun god.
That has nothing to do with vampires.
it kinda does - vampires in modern folklore are essentially a Christian monster. ironically for a Christian monster, they actually aren't strongly associated with demonic/satanic possessions or soul bargains - even the more superstitious treatments were more like something weird (but dangerous to the living) that sometimes happens to corpses and have to be returned to the grave.
interestingly, the soul's status was never all that important - a dead body moving around when it shouldn't be was the main problem.
back on topic, vulnerability to sunlight wasn't even culturally solidified with vampires until the 1800s
ah, and given the thread's content, it should be noted that stories about vampire sex have been around for CENTURIES
I love her so much
Test
sex with vampire
If I can pick anything then
>sun making device aka hydrogen bomb
>burry it in the basement or conceal it in any other way
>lure her inside or if not possible at least in 1km to 10km proximity
>parry this you filthy casuall
>praise the sun.png
>try regeneating from being vaporized
Job done. Hey if it would be possible I wouldn't mind marrying her and making bunch of cute brats. Make love not war anons.
>sun making device aka hydrogen bomb
Please call it bottled sunshine or star in a box.
>parry this you filthy casuall
It's casull.
breediing
wood stake
holy water
cross
I want to make a cross with Yupiel and have her cover my wood stake with her holy water if you know what I mean
And a wedding ring, right?
a small pocket knife.
based tsuhikime enjoyer
kill the moronic vampire girl, then seduce her, and have loving sex
it was probably the most based series of events ive seen
Making an impossibly powerful woman fall in love with you and become your loyal wife is maximally based and hugely underappreciated. I hate when people think I'm some kinda sub or something when they find out I like a strong anime girl, or when that's refuted think I have some kind of domination/subjugation fetish.
Well, do you?
No, I'm dominant but I'm a pretty soft dom and want a girl to submit because she wants to, not because I force her to.
So you're in denial.
>Ask of me, and I shall give thee the heathen for thine inheritance, and for thy possession, the ends of the earth. Thou shalt break them with a rod of iron. Thou shalt dash them in pieces, like a potters vessel. Be wise now therefore, ye kings. Be admonished, ye judges of the earth. Serve the Lord with fear, and rejoice with trembling. Kiss the son lest he be angry, and ye perish in the way, though his wrath be kindled but a little
Lmg with silver core bullets
I find the movement restrictions and compulsory aspects of vampires more interesting than 'they are super fast and super strong and blah blah blah'.
Like they can't enter a home unless invited. They can't cross flowing water, which then makes it interesting what is considered crossing and what counts as flowing water. They have to rest in a coffin with earth from their homeland if I remember right. Sunlight hurts them. They have to count certain things when encountered. There is so much that restricts where they can go and forces them to certain behaviours. It's really interesting to learn what basis those myths have, like I think the silver thing is cause silver reacts with certain poisons and thus can be used to identify poison in the food, thus its considered a purifying material.
The flowing water thing is probably my favourite cause it produces a random barrier for them that they can't willingly cross over. And probably the wording is important. In Hellsing Seras is too weak to cross flowing water, so they put her in a coffin and thus I guess she gets transported instead of crossing. In Touhou during the weather incident Remilias weather was rain so she was stuck in the mansion. Often it gets misinterpretated as flowing water weakening Vampires, but Remilia goes out during the day with just an umbrella and avoiding rain is easier than sunlight. So if rain is a hindrance then it must be cause its a compelling barrier.
What do ancient e-girl vampires smell like?
Ever been to a nursing home?
Kind of like that.
>e-girl hag with Alzheimer's
>calls you constantly because she forgot you visited already
>gives you hard candy and calls you handsome
I want this.
>Verification not required.
In this world there are grannies and there are e-girls, but there are no e-girlbabas. It's fricked up, if you ask me.
I remember that doujin.
I don't. Help me remember.
https://nhentai.net/g/254022/
oh I thought you meant the other one
The line is literally from the doujin I linked
Source.
nah you don't want it
BROTHER, I NEED IT!
https://exhentai.org/g/1133705/9ca21b6112/
You know how to sadpanda, right?
Don't remember if I've read that particular piece but it looks like Yam's art to me
Frick, I just read this while talking to my friend, who's the closest thing I've ever encountered to a real life e-girlbaba, for the first time in months. Really didn't need that right now kek.
Sounds a bit gay.
Ojibaba.
Female friend (male), I presume?
Nah, female. I was actually worried she might be a trap when we first met but that's since been conclusively disproven.
just get some of your guys and sharpen some sticks and get in a formation. what is the vampire gonna do? if it gets close just poke its heart out
I'm told gas was rather effective against cunning bloodsuckers in WWII.
... Oh, COME ON, guys! My millenial ass shouldn't be posting this!
Is this a fitting punishment for vampires that have terrorized mankind for centuries?
Too kind. On top of being preggo 24/7 she needs bake duck loads of bread and pastries to give to the peasant folk, and use her magic blood to cure the sick.
You want thousands of peasants to turn into ghouls dominated by her?
Is that such a bad fate???? She can help the community and mend ties
What if it's a Soviet vampire?
Kill her with gabidalism :DD
throw her a loaf of bread, that will give you a few seconds to chop off the head
fuzzy water and ice skating
They'd do it and then use some terrorist group nobody cares about as a scapegoat. You think there are orphan sources and missing nukes by mistake? Plausible deniability when something needs to go.
Steel-toed boots
Garlic essential oil vaporizer, flash bangs/ flairs, silver plated buck shot, and holy water mixed with silver nitrate in a super soaker for good mesure.
This thread was fun. Let's do it again sometime.
Silver #4 buckshot in a 10 gauge 3" semi-auto. Then stake the remains through the heart.
Unless it's pic-related, in which case I find a means to become an incubus or something else that can't have his soul eaten. Then frick her into a stupor and carry her off.
A big net soaked in holy water and a wench on my truck to drag it outside into the sunlight.
submachine gun
with bullets melted down from a blessed silver cross of a cathedral hollow tips blessed oil expolsive tips