>walk into picrel
>wagie asks what I need
>toilet flapper
>wagies tells me location
>thank the wagie, proceed to location
>overhear wagie call out on radio, customer needs toiler flapper
>goddamnmt.jpg
>another wagie waiting by the isle
>here are the flappers sir, do you need help finding a flapper sir, just let me know sir
>grab flapper and thank the wagie
>another wagie pops out of the backroom
>sir did you have any issues finding the flapper sir
>clearly carrying the damn flapper thank the wagie and tell him I'm fine
>half way to register, old santa looking motherfricker wagie pops up, sir did you find the flapper
>yes santa, I have the fricking flapper you can see me carrying it, thank you for keeping me on the good boy list
>at the register
>sir did you find the flapper you were looking for sir?
>holy shit clearly I have found the flapper you already scanned
Why are they like this anons? I know wagies probably find this even stupider than I do and it's management making them do it.
They probably thought you had Down Syndrome or some other disability and wanted to make sure you didn't get lost. Did they offer you a sucker?
>about to end shift at ACE when alert 37 is sent to all employees
>alert 37 basically means "He's back, get to your station"
>entire staff swings into action, dropping equipment and pausing discussions in mid sentence
>I'm notified that OP needs a toilet flapper so i rush to aisle 14 to wait
>pic related shows up and I successfully negotiate the transfer as trained
>weeks of intensive training pay off and OP is on his way in less than one hour
>I receive $50 bonus on payday for "calm professional behavior under extreme stress"
>Alert 37
Should have been either 47 or 21.
*21-3
I first read it as "He's black, get to your station."
They use the shvoogie buzzer for that code.
>OP
and everyone clapped
THE END
but seriously they are a bit overly helpful, but I have never had them be like your cute fan fiction.
go to home depot if you don't want help.
>and everyone clapped
Go back: www.reddit.com
you seem obsessed with this "reddit" maybe you should go there. since I most certainly do not.
Ace is the place where they help the tard, where folks?
I'd take this any day of the week over Home Depot (or as I call it, Home Sleep-o) and the 3 employees they have scattered over their stadium sized store and who are either faded out of their head on nitrous oxide or can't speak English.
if you knew what you were doing you wouldn't need their help. The hands of a high maintenance tool queen wrote your post
Finding a 1/4 inch cork plug in a non-specified aisle in a 100,000 square ft. warehouse is a little hard.
Just google it. Heard of homedepot.com?
>right this way sir
>we have a large selection of flappers to choose from
>Pic implies that the hardware store employee thinks "flapper" is the customer's childish description of a toilet seat
O I am laffin
KEK
Clearly you are not of British descent
no human I've ever known of is
>by the isle
>isle
was he on a boat?
>venetian hardware store
>all aisles are canals
>Why are they like this anons?
A lot of these stores barely get any foot traffic so every customer that walks in is an event.
>Why are they like this anons? I know wagies probably find this even stupider than I do and it's management making them do it.
That is literally ACE's gimmick
"ACE is the place with the helpful hardware man" remember.
You walk into ACE when you want every single employee to ask you multiple times if you need help during your trip.
If you want completely ignored you go to home depot or lowes, wagies hide from you there.
I went to a small hardware store once to get some screws and washers, an old man with shaky hands was there to help me. So bothersome, i can just grab what i see. It felt like such a made up job.
My grandmother is a widow, she loves Ace. She piles up bigger tasks for me when I visit, but for smaller stuff she walks into Ace, asks then to hand her the correct item and will do the fix herself.
She refuses to walk into Lowes or Home Depot, will pay the extra every time
bet you would have hated it back when full service gas stations were a thing.
There's one really close to me. The only one I've ever seen.
You have an actual full service station (and you don't live in oregon or new jersey)? I haven't seen one anywhere (outside those 2 states) in about 40 years.
they pump your gas, check your oil, and tires, and clean your windshield?
>check your oil, and tires
No the frick they don't, would not want them too anyway
>clean your windshield
Debatable, usually they just spray it with soapy water and squeegee it and usually they're going too fast to do a half decent job.
then it's not a full service station because they did ALL those things.
>~~*full service*~~
step away from the dipstick please
well dipstick (can I call you dipstick?) great.
well dipstick. the reason they did all that stuff was because cars back then were one step away from crap. the best tires you could get lasted 10,000 miles (my dad had to replace them every year). they burned oil, you had to lube all chassis, they had multiple belts, they dripped and leaked. so they checked all that stuff to catch it before shit broke.
That's wrong because my pappy always tells me new cars are junk and that they don't make em like they used to
that's because your pappy was probably a real man and could fix old cars. people who can fix things don't think things are junk, and they probably are right.
most new cars I have owned are a pain in the ass to work on.
people don't realize that old tube radios and TV's broke all the time, but they were super simple to fix.
My grandfather owned one till he shut it down in the early 90s, it was the last full service gas station in the area.
>random screws and other hardware
This is Ace's best attribute along with being about 2.5 blocks away from any location in the US. Otherwise they're overpriced and spotty with their knowledge. Sometimes they can staff a few people who actually know what they're doing and their inventory, other times you can't get a gallon of paint mixed.
>being about 2.5 blocks away from any location in the US
ACE hardware shill pls lv
that's what you get for living in swamp ass NC.
everywhere I have lived has been within 2 miles of one.
I live 90 miles away from you
I live 9498 miles away from either of you.
Damn I'd love to rent this place as an air bnb for the backwoods experience
Just go to the lowes in Roxboro, I'll hook you up
>Otherwise they're overpriced and spotty with their knowledge.
Overpriced yes. But I believe they are still franchises, not big box corporate like Lowes or HD. So their cost is going to be more.
My experience is they're usually more knowledgeable than the big box places. As long as there's an old guy working there. I'll take the old guy at an Ace over anyone at a HD. And he's quicker to find.
Best place if you need some quick key dups made, hands down.
Ace is a COOP not a franchise. Each store doesnt buy rights to use the name, they're part owners of the name.
>You walk into ACE when you want every single employee to ask you multiple times if you need help during your trip.
>If you want completely ignored you go to home depot or lowes, wagies hide from you there.
That feeling when you live in podunk nowhere and Ace is the only hardware store around. Nearest lowes or home depot is 3 hours away.
Only time I hate living in a small town is when I have to go to Ace because it's an emergency repair.
I live with in a mile of a home depot, and an ACE.
I go to home depot for super common crap that everyone has, and ACE for all the crap which home depot does not (which is a lot for a large store).
I grew up in a small town, it was TruValue with old retired men who hawk over you, or drive a good 2 hours to somewhere else.
I made me a hoarder and impulsive "just in case" buyer, it still plagues me to this day. I live 10 minutes from hardware stores now but the bad habits still remain.
About 15 years ago I was in Home Depot with a couple friends trying to make something to smoke weed out of. Visibly autistic man asks us if we needed help 7 times over the course of a few minutes.
Yea u can check the inventory there moron, or get it shipped you fricking homosexual. You like that you corkscrew loving b***h boy?
No you can't. You're lying, you sound insane.
shit
the last time I went to ace, I was on my way to a hippie fest and I wanted to grab some coleman fuel.
the wagie had no idea there was such a thing and couldn't even point me in the direction of were to get it.
the wagie looked 17
>go to Ace
>have a decent experience
>pay a little bit more for the convenience
>Isle
Why does your ace hardware have small islands in it
>go to Home Depot
>looking for long brass punch to remove stearing stem bearings on motorcycle
>nothing long enough
>old guy employee strolls up
>"can I help you"
>explain to old guy but looks like he doesn't understand
>"when I was young we used copper grounding rods"
>"We have some over in the commercial electrical"
I always talk to the older guys.
The rods are normally plated steel and good for many things. Cutting at a slight angle makes them good bearing drifts. Another way is weld some scrap across the inside of very stuck races then use your long drift to beat those out.
Old guys at home depot are the best. young zoomers at menards don't even know where stuff in the store is, let alone help with a project.
or just get brass rods.
>I always talk to the older guys.
Whenever I send the wife to the hardware store, she knows to only ask the grey- or white-haired guys for help.
>Lots of Black folk near Raleigh?
Most of the Raleigh area is cool, except for uncontrolled growth for decades leading to horrible traffic on I40 and some other spots.
Pic related is where you go to get enriched by the wonders of diversity.
>go to Home Depot
>teeming with 15 year old Mexican girls and 80 year old boomers
>find what I need in 2 minutes
>get sidetracked looking at tools for 30 minutes
>push entire cart of merchandise out of the front entrance for the 5th time this week
I really don’t see why people shop anywhere else
I used to be like that, I've got like eight multimeters and two label makers that I use like twice a year.
>virgin moronic ace customer