I'm not sure that spending a third of the military budget on GROND was such a good idea.
I'm not sure that spending a third of the military budget on GROND was such a good idea.
I'm not sure that spending a third of the military budget on GROND was such a good idea.
GROND GROND GROND GROND
Fpgp
>muh GROND
Literal redditBlack person meme; you need to go back and stay back
Elvish hands typed this
Post Bow
post sword
post axe!
Whining about reddit is peak newbie behavior, nobody seethed about reddit 15yrs ago on this bengali curtain-weaving forum.
you have a short and moronic memory
Yes; Elf Lives Matter
What is the GROND equivalent IRL?
Capital equipment for defeating fixed fortifications? strike aircraft
Enormously large singular weapons operated by orcs? Admiral Kuznetzov
I'd say Schwerer Gustav and similar siege artillery. Strike aircraft are intended for mobile targets.
I hate this depiction, it should've been a hammer like its namesake
>"and in its midst was a huge ram, great as a forest-tree a hundred feet in length, swinging on mighty chains. Long had it been forging in the dark smithies of Mordor, and its hideous head, founded of black steel was shaped in the likeness of a ravening wolf; on it spells of ruin lay. Grond they named it, in memory of the hammer of the Underworld of old."
It was named in memory, not named because it was a copy of.
the books are not canon
Gave me a hearty chuckle, here's your (you)
>it should've been a hammer like its namesake
Not a wolf like in the book?
The original Grond was hammer wielded by Morgoth...the name "Grond" meant "hammer of the underworld"
Are you mad that Sherman tanks look like a tank and not like a Sherman?
You say that, but I've heard the Australian Sentinel tank looks exactly like its designer's, that is Bruce Sentinel's, penis.
Yes but in both the books and the film, the ram is shaped like a wolf.
What else should Sauron have spent it on? More personal equipment for the orcniks? Aid to Isengard?
Literally just spam more Oliphants and Nazghul.
>doomstack brainlet
.t fights battles the 'honorable' way instead of the efficient way
More Olyphants would be a great idea
>Not enough Vespene Gas
>hmmmm yes surely this 50lb short bow is strong enough to penetrate this thing's hide, let alone its skull
Legolas' bow was at least magical, and had effects in excess of any bow ever made by a factor of ten.
How did a few Gondorians mog these guys but 8000 Rohirrim got rekt instantly?
You'd think the Rohirrim would instantly switch to horse archery and pelt them from afar since their horses are faster.
>How did a few Gondorians mog these guys
ambush far behind enemy lines, and focus firing the one or two Oliphaunts present
>8000 Rohirrim got rekt
only initially, then they did manage to down quite a few and hold the Oliphaunts at bay
An actual screening force to detect the GIANT FRICKING CAVALRY ARMY thats threatening his flank. Larger catapults, siegeladders, armored siegetowers, etc.
There are a lot of things that couldve been done instead
>screening force
>catapults
>etc and sundry
Yes but my counterpoint
GROND GROND GROND GROND
Just a reminder that Sauron loses literally every battle in the trilogy. As a military commander he was fricking moronic.
he wins both battles of osgiliath bozo
NTA been too lazy to read the books but doesn’t Sauron just rely on meat waves in basically every battle
You know you are trash when even demons such as Jahy have scored more victories than you.
Her defeating Kyoko through positioning, resource management and sheer determination shows she is better commander than Sauron will ever be.
Sauron is so bad at winning he got his ass kicked by a literal dog.
We'd comment on your favorite show but unfortunately the rest of us aren't trans.
>liking women is trans
sounds like an awful lot of projection anon.
>liking women is trans
Trannies often have weird obsessions with feminine imagery, I'd call that a core part of the psychosis.
I guess every heterosexual man is trans then. Good thing that excludes you.
looking at boobs is not a weird obsession. Getting really into animes/mangas where all the main characters are female as a man is pretty fricking strange, definitely borders on troonism. Same with playing as a female character in a RPG, very sus.
>he doesn't want to admire the female body as he's hacking and slashing through dozens of RPG mooks
How homosexual.
The israelite fears the homosexual. Women like dick and that's gay. I hate women, that's the only reason why I frick them.
>anon never learned what the "RP" in RPG stands for
nta but roleplaying as a girl is a little sus
Very sus. I've heard all of this before when I confront men that play as women in roleplaying games. It's always met with the same defensiveness and gaslighting and has done nothing to convince me I'm wrong, quite the opposite.
you just sound like a gay tbhfamalam
why is what other people do important to you?
If I'm going to be grinding levels for 100+ hours I want to look at a form that appeals to me. Not everyone has to mentally identify with their character to have a fun time.
>Spending 100 hours pretending you're a girl isn't something trannies do
>when a number of the main characters in anime/manga are female, he worries the drawings will give him cooties
>he wants the ass he views for hours in an RPG's third person mode to look as masculine as possible
Why are incels like this?
>I can only relate to characters that look exactly like me and are literally me
Groid spotted
you seem strangely insecure
As a heterosexual man is there anything more heterosexual than appreciating the female form?
bump
>Sauron is so bad at winning he got his ass kicked by a literal dog.
He did sieze the tower and land (i forget the original name) but was called "the isle of werewolfs" that the battle between him and Huan fought
...so thats one win 🙂
Oh they had a screening force watching the roads from Rohan
Emphasis on the had
>Show up
>Offer to help the Rohirrim through the forest
>Just asks to be left the frick alone forever after that
>Fulfill their pledge
>Disappear into the woods, never to be seen again
Wild Men were based, but yeah, I can kinda understand cutting them out of the film.
While I understand, I won't forgive them for cutting out Tom Bombadil and replacing Glorfindel with Arwen.
Why are the orcs digging trenches in the Mordor Exclusion Zone?
no, and you should read the books.
there were plenty of human allies with Sauron. Plus, remember Sauron interned under Aule, the sort-of archangel of smithing, plus many of Sauron's servants were Black Numenoreans who were pretty smart.
This seems like something I'd read in Polygon or Salon.
Well, good thing its in Tolkien's letters instead.
>I won't forgive them for cutting out Tom Bombadil
>be me
>constantly hear people b***h about Tom Bombadil not being in the movies
>think he must be some really important character
>finally get around to reading the books
>he's present for like two chapters of the first book
>saves the hobbits twice and then does literally nothing of importance for the rest of the story
>apparently he's the most powerful being on the planet but uses all that power to sit around in a forest doing frick all
I really don't get the fanboy obsession with Tom Bombadil. He's a character that only appeals to the losers who say shit like "Oh I'm actually really smart, I just didn't apply myself in school". Cutting him out of the movies was absolutely the correct decision and I will not pretend otherwise.
It's just that the fellowship of the ring is a constant slide from fairytale fantasy towards darker fantasy.
Tom is just a part of that whimsical fairytale part of the early book, who then gets contrasted by and replaced by some horrors like the ringwraiths, the watcher in the dark and balrog.
>be powerful, wise ancient being
>do nothing but fish and pound water nymph pussy
He had it all figured out
^
A being who found true contentment. I'd tell the rest of the world to get fricked, too.
Seriously, bombadil stans are morons.
Imagine if you befriended an ant hill, and they were at war with some other ants. Sure their battle is beneath you, and you're so powerful compared to the ants that it's incomprehensible. That doesn't change the fact that you did befriend those ants, and if they were able to communicate with you their issues, you'd take the 30 seconds to just go over and stomp their enemies and lazer a few with a magnifying glass. Bombadil was a fricking homosexual and people who liked him in the story were even bigger homosexuals.
Bombadil was a nature spirit, he didn't command armies nor wield the kind of sorcery that would defeat Sauron. Read the book a bit more carefully and pay attention to what Gandalf says about him.
You mean the bit where he was able to handle the ring, make it disappear and reappear and give it back to Frodo? That book? You want me to read that one?
Oh no, no army? So what? He's canonically immeasurably powerful. To go back into my example with ants, you're basically saying that because I don't have an ant army, I could never defeat the enemy ants on behalf of my friend ants. You fricking dunce.
You're applying a false analogy, Bombadil never had the power to destroy the ring (making it "disappear" is just a parlor trick, it wasn't actually destroyed) nor does he have the power to crush Sauron's armies like a vengeful God from on-high. I think you're simply misunderstanding the nature of the character. Yes, he's a flighty nature spirit who doesn't care about mortal affairs. No, he doesn't have the power to simply snap his fingers and defeat Sauron.
>He's canonically immeasurably powerful.
>-t. materialistic sauronmind
No, he's a different category of mythological being. He can't exercise power over others and in consequence they can't exercise power over him. He's a prelapsarian nature spirit, basically the innocent pagan version of what Shelob is on the Lovecratian spectrum, he represents the inconsistencies every realistic mythology inherits from the previous ones.
Thanks, I think you explain it better than I did because yeah, the really esoteric shit isn't really my bag.
You could've just stopped at
>he's a nature spirit
He's like an even more powerful Fangorn. Doesn't give a shit, so he could easily lose the Ring eventually. As I understand it, Tolkien wrote him to represent well-meaning pacifists. The "good men who do nothing", so to speak.
Actually, on the whole Valar, maiar all that shit…
power scale, where does he rank?
I'm not sure it was ever exactly elaborated but I'd guess somewhere above Gandalf and other Maiar but below the full-fledged Valar and maybe below Sauron himself who was very powerful for his type.
I'm a huge Tolkien nerd but going as far as relative power-levels is a bit too far even for me. It's not like Tolkien wrote these types of stats down RPG-style. After all, this is a fairy tale.
>Oh I'm actually really smart, I just didn't apply myself in school
Literally me. I wish someone would cut me out.
Tom fans are moronic yes.
But Pelennor Fields battle was handled like shit in movies. Deus ex machina ghosts instead of based Grey Company. Also prince Imrahil was the biggest gigachad in the entire trilogy.
What annoys me most is that they're filmed in a modern wild meadow
Gondor is a huge city and Tolkien quite specifically describes all the fields and orchards around it to feed the population
But in the movie it's just pic related
budget
it should really be a bunch of hamlets and manorial fields
Tom bombadil was an annoying autistic frick who could have just destroyed the ring himself. Arwen was great fap material and the more she was in it the better. I get it, you like seeing those elf twinks, but you can just go on /gif/ to see chicks with dicks, no need to ruin movies.
>Tom bombadil was an annoying autistic frick who could have just destroyed the ring himself.
That's not what the book said. It more or less said he could keep the ring but that would still be only a temporary solution, because the ring would still exist and Sauron's power would continue to grow. Nowhere was it suggested that he had the power to destroy it.
>An actual screening force to detect the GIANT FRICKING CAVALRY ARMY thats threatening his flank.
He did in the book, and it never said he didnt in the movie.
The problem is that Rohan horses which can ride "Three days gallop" without stopping (which would kill any real horse 100 times over) could easily overtake any scouts you had, meaning they'd arrive before your messengers even if they didn't kill them.
>Larger catapults,
In the book, their siege weapons were largely ineffective, and there is a critical size past which any seige engine cannot be scaled upwards with the same materials.
In the film, the catapults were something like 200 times more powerful than any catapult ever built.
>siegeladders, armored siegetowers
He didn't run out of either of these, and if he doesnt want his seige towers moving at a snails pace compared to their already slow pace, he's limited in their number by the number of magical beasts he has, he cant print off more trolls like in an RTS.
They would have never punched through the gate or outer wall, and never would have been able to deploy their greatest advantage in an open melee, the trolls. They would have bogged down on the first level for days, giving extra time for reinforcements not only from Rohan but everywhere else. Gondor is a Kingdom, not a city.
In the book he did have a force to block reinforcements from Rohan. Sauron was not stupid in a strategic or tactical sense. He was only stupid in that he saw things only through the lens of power and the desire for it. This made him a great statesman, but with a very narrow and cynical view of the world. As a general he was clever and thought ahead. Easterlings to besiege Erebor and destroy Dale. Orcs from Dol Guldur to keep Lothlorien in check. Saruman to tie up the Rohirrim (and Sauron saw through Saruman's bullshit immediately because in him he had a kindred spirit). That left Gondor isolated while he mind-raped their ruler through the Palantir. Even had the one ring been dropped into the ocean, he still would have won through sheer military might.
As a politician, he was highly capable, and he was somewhat vindicated in his disbelief that anyone could actually destroy the ring willfully when Frodo succumbed to its temptation. It was the mode in which Sauron thrived (violence, greed and deceit) that led to the ring's destruction, not selfless altruism. And that is just how Tolkien saw evil, that of being wasteful and self-destructive, out of which greater goods can be acquired.
>Even had the one ring been dropped into the ocean, he still would have won through sheer military might
This is what people tend to forget, I think the movies didn't harp on it enough. Sauron was gonna win a conventional war, destroying the Ring before that happens was the only hail-mary play they had left
Wasn't it implied that he would eventually win if the ring wasn't destroyed, as he could just send endless meat waves at his enemies, even after losing major battles? I mean, a major theme in the books is that it's not just the heroes and that great battles that decide the fate of the world, but also the actions of the small and seemingly insignificant, which in LOTR is represented by the hobbits and Gollum.
Yeah in the books or was said that he was about to simply roll over the West with military force. All of the armies and forces seen in the three books were only a fraction of the might Sauron had amassed behind the black gate and was about to unleash.
To add to these
Sauron did not originally plan to attack Minas Tirith when he did. He was quite content to wait and continue massing his forces, knowing that with time his enemies declined and his forces grew more powerful and numerous. That changed when Aragorn challenged him through the Palantir (which happens before he takes the Paths of the Dead in the books). Sauron mistakenly believes that Aragorn has come into position of the ring. Since he is the heir of Elendil, and has a powerful enough will to best Sauron's control over the Palantir, he grows very concerned that Aragorn has the ability to master the ring (given enough time). He also believes that his enemy is underestimating him, since Aragorn reveals himself before mastering the ring. So he moves the timetable forward with the dual aim of reclaiming the ring for himself and defeating Gondor before its king can turn Sauron's ultimate weapon against him. The same thing happens again after Pelennor Fields. When the forces of the West march on the Black Gate, Sauron thinks they have completely underestimated him (thinking they've spent all his forces), and thus happily accepts battle rather than simply wait them out.
Long story short, Sauron the great deceiver is defeated by deception (that, humility, the perseverance of two Hobbits, and an act of God).
He really wasn't though, because despite all the forces the two hobbits had to sneak through to get there, the actual access point to Mt. Doom had zero guard presence. In what fricking universe would anyone with the tiniest modicum of common sense not have a fortified garrison of hundreds of orcs directly on top of every single opening that led to the mountain's interior? He also had access to a fairly robust industrial base and could have, I don't know, built a fricking giant steel door over the fricking top of the lava. Even if he didn't know the ring's exact location, why the FRICK was it even possible for anyone to gain access to the place it could be destroyed? That whole area for miles in every direction should have been under 24/7 surveillance, it shouldn't have even been possible to sneak through.
I think that just proves the anon's point about Evil being high on its own supply of arrogance and deception. Sauron couldn't imagine that they'd undertake some mission to destroy the ring, rather, they'd claim it for themselves to fight Sauron
That is itself an excellent point, but what if one considers
GROND GROND GROND GROND
>In what fricking universe would anyone with the tiniest modicum of common sense not have a fortified garrison of hundreds of orcs directly on top of every single opening that led to the mountain's interior?
Have you read the books? The one and only way through the mountains was gaurded by fully garrisoned tower (Cirith Ungol)...and to even get thst far you had to get through Shelobs lair
wildmen that live in the mountain passes ambushed and yeeted the screening force iirc
These are both excellent points IMHO. Hm.
/mulls it over
They came out of a forest that was infested by tribals that killed intruders on sight. His forces were more spread out than the films would indicate also meaning they could isolate large groups.
Minas Tiriths gates weren't magic, they were steel and wood. They were in fact made stronger after the war using Mithril. The walls were magic of the early age though, making the gate the weakness.
>The Death Star returned to Kuat under its own power
t. had his family blown up
lmao! sheev did nothing wrong
It busted the gate, didn't it? also
>GRAD
>GRAD
>GRAD
This, where would they be without the grond? Outside.
Are you people moronic? Did you people think Grond was a wasteful ego project or something? The Great Gate of Minas Tirith were made from some ancient lost super engineering art and guarded an archway which no enemy had ever passed. It was a HARD defensive point. Grond was needed to do the job. Even with the Witch-King providing magic buffs it took 4 strokes to do it; a common siege engine probably would have been useless.
>3019 years into the three day special operation
>Mordor still hasn't taken Minas Tirith
>Rohirrim still keeping Saruman's forces tied down in Helmstal
>It took Saruman 2 years to take the hamlet of Piskburg which is 5 miles from Isengard
Osgiliath status?
>To the dung-pit with those fools who seek to block the Reform of Mordor! P'Yeer Spreygh of Haradwaith has been granted imperium by Sauron himself to purge the inefficiency and budgetary overruns that have held back the orcs. Cavalry is outmoded, and simple, reliable ramming technology is innately superior to the overly complicated and costly trebuchets of nations of Man!
>GROND GROND GROND
It worked. Money well spent. No one could have foreseen the use of ghosts. They needed a bigger budget for nulls.
While it did work pretty well I feel like the Troll shock troopers standing right outside the gate could have bashed a hole in the gate themselves in the time it took to drag Grond up to the walls.
I seem to recall that in the books the gate was far more impressive, however. That and I guess you probably want your shock troopers to be as rested as possible before the push instead of tiring themselves out smashing a gate open.
The contrarian part of me wonders why Sauron didn't just have Sauronman make him a few more of those frickhuge bombs used at Helm's Deep, but I guess Sauronman probably kept his trade secrets close.
>While it did work pretty well I feel like the Troll shock troopers standing right outside the gate could have bashed a hole in the gate themselves in the time it took to drag Grond up to the walls.
Well, you'd be wrong.
>I seem to recall that in the books the gate was far more impressive, however. That and I guess you probably want your shock troopers to be as rested as possible before the push instead of tiring themselves out smashing a gate open.
Nothing in the movie suggests it isnt as strong as in the book. The orcs have been hammering it with a conventional ram for so long there's a growing pile of their bodies on the ground and they haven't made a single scratch in it.
In the book, the walls and towers of Gondor were made by ancient Numenoreans, which means they were practically invulnerable. The walls and towers in the book didn't just collapse like legos when hit, like in the movies, they stood strong. In fact, the orc's were actually smart and their strategy was to make really huge trebuchets that outranged Minis Tirith's tower defenses, and they perlted inside the city with fire bombs that set fire to the lower levels.
Also, I think Sauron already distrusted Saruman's true intentions and he turned out to be right.
>like in the movies
The only thing that broke when hit in the movies was the actual buildings on the walls.
There were iirc a few frames where you can see the top parts of the walls break off after getting hit.
It got the job done. Errbody wants to complain about MIC corruption but do they ever admit when MIC gear just werks? No! it's an Elvish plot I tell ye.
Do orcs rape in Tolkien universe ? Ain't gonna believe they didn't enjoyed at least some of those tight elven pussies in like 9'000+ years
Likely had no reproductive organs, considering they don't actually reproduce.
there are orc women, tolkien himself said so.
It's very likely the half orcs described in various passages are the results of rape.
Elrond's wife Celebrian might've been raped by orcs.
penus is a very useful appendage for creatures of evil and malice. Not having one would be very limiting.
They "breed in the manner of men" according to tolkien. Being an anglo he could barely bring himself to talk about sex at the best of times. We're lucky he was Catholic, otherwise there would have been no women in the entire series and new men would have just sprung out of holes in the ground.
In the films, we see Uruk Hai emerging from pits in the ground full grown, but they're stated to be the children of Orcs and Men. The idea the filmmakers had was that Saruman rapidly grew them by placing them as newborns into a kind of magical earth-womb.
>We're lucky he was Catholic, otherwise there would have been no women in the entire series and new men would have just sprung out of holes in the ground.
You're saying that LotR could have been even better?
easily
>but they're stated to be the children of Orcs and Men
who the frick has sex with orcs? is that why they import Haradrim? they're the only race willing to have sex with orc women?
Maybe it's like an overexaggeration of the slav cliche. The guys are violent drunks and pretty uggo while the girls look hot and are nihilistic cynics.
>he needs it spelled out
Rape
>who the frick has sex with orcs?
Female leads in Japanese hentai comics.
In both the films and the books, the implication is that Saruman's human forces (The Dundelings of Dunland and the Hillmen of Rhudaur) are their "willing" parents, whether through their own degeneracy or Saruman's magical domination. Remember that when Tolkien says "men" he means "Human". He never refers to male orcs or dwarves or whatever as "Men"
"But these creatures of Isengard, these half-orcs and goblin-men that the foul craft of Saruman has bred, they will not quail at the sun."
From Gamling
"It became clear in time that undoubted Men could under the domination of Morgoth or his agents in a few generations be reduced almost to the Orc-level of mind and habits; and then they would or could be made to mate with Orcs, producing new breeds, often larger and more cunning. There is no doubt that long afterwards, in the Third Age, Saruman rediscovered this, or learned of it in lore, and in his lust for mastery committed this, his wickedest deed: the interbreeding of Orcs and Men, producing both Men-orcs large and cunning, and Orc-men treacherous and vile."
>he wouldn't take a snaga warbride
Tolkien actually wrote down that if elves were about to be raped they would immediately choose to die from the sheer trauma (elven souls can seemingly leave their bodies if they deem corporeal life to be too burdensome, although they will eventually be re-embodied). Knowing orcs however, I don't doubt that a mere corpse would somehow deter them.
Tolkiens cope
Yes, heavily
what if they lust for boc?
Truly my lord? For me?
Elves canonically don't lust period. They are pure, which is exactly why Japanese hentai writers like them. Japs have a cultural fetish for defiling purity, which is why grown as women squeal like little girls in JAV.
Tolkien's Anglo nature and Catholic nature forever grappling in eternal combat as he tries to write about healthy men and women engaged in the biological imperative necessary for life itself.
>write about
he's Catholic and Victorian, he doesn't write about sex, period
AITOO however who actually enjoyed the bit where Eowyn and Faramir hook up?
>mad "I can fix her" vibes
>he's Catholic
That would suggest he'd be all about the sex, not against it. Catholics are breeders, which is why the English are so against it.
Catholics literally believe sex for pleasure is a sin.
Sex *purely* for pleasure is a sin, there's a difference there.
so fricking stupid, cant believe people believe this kind of shit lmao
Do you not know that Catholics are literally famous around the world for having large families and have been famous for that for like four hundred years?
Do kids not know that cultural reference anymore?
Anon I’m Catholic and that’s just not true. Sex is awesome and that’s why Catholics are famous for having lots of kids.
you're thinking of protestants
and even if it was a sin, catholics also believe in forgiveness
You must be joking
Protestants are the liberals you idiot
>t.
>That would suggest he'd be all about the sex, not against it. Catholics are breeders
Only because they're moronic about the hurr durr contraception horseshit
>Only because they're moronic about the hurr durr contraception horseshit
Reminder Sex Ed is and always has been a disaster that not only had the exact opposite effect of every single one of it's stated goals, but also has destroyed western demographics, and that the sexual revolution will be remembered for hundreds of years as a crippling blow to human culture.
Obviously the libdems are perverting it their way, yes
But our problem is that we didn't offer a viable alternative. Still don't - the GOP pretends that we can still live in a world where ZERO sex ed is the norm, and that's equally moronic
>Obviously the libdems are perverting it their way, yes
>But our problem is that we didn't offer a viable alternative.
Our enemy proposes giving everyone AIDS, but the REAL problem is we don't offer mandatory HIV to people ourselves.
>the GOP pretends that we can still live in a world where ZERO sex ed is the norm, and that's equally moronic
We did for all of human history, and will again. Anon there's no "good version" of a society with common contraceptives and sex ed taught in school. EVERY version of that society turns into dick-chopping cults and mass immigration within a hundred years.
Once a generation of girls is inducted into the cult of the birth control pill, you're hard-locked onto the "no more power grid mass starvation skull pyramids" ending for your civilization.
or, hear me out, teach kids that tab A goes into slot B and it's fun but don't encourage teenage pregnancy and sleeping around
there IS a middle ground between Dem and GOP talking points, you know
>or, hear me out, teach kids that tab A goes into slot B and it's fun
>just a little bit of aids, hear me out, I dont want to infect all your blood, just a little.
There was no fricking problem, you invented a "solution" to a mythological problem that has actually created an almost infinite number of real problems since the day it was first implemented, for absolutely no gain.
>there IS a middle ground between Dem and GOP talking points, you know
There literally isn't. There's correct, and there's various stages of degeneracy intentionally designed and laid out to give way to further degeneracy each generation.
>Elves canonically don't lust period
How come Aragorn had a kid with Arwen ? Did he raped her or what ?
Women actually don't have to feel any sexual attraction or desire to have sex. Or even to be good at it.
Orcs find elves and everything made by elves completely repulsive.
I find black women repulsive. That's why I enjoy fricking and humiliating them.
Orcs aren't brutish savages. They are as intelligent as men and skilled craftsmen. They also consistently show more restraint than humans.
Literal lookism on your part.
Tolkien Orcs are Germans. They rape the German way.
Tolkien orcs are Mongols and Turks
>t. someone who reads
Tolkien famously hated allegory so no, he wouldn't make them look like any irl races
Also, this is something the Poles should know because they shit up every Youtube video of the Pelennor fields and Helms Deep battle with how Tolkien wrote the Rohirrim's charge after the charge of the Winged Hussars in Vienna.
>Tolkien famously hated allegory
The full quote is a little more nuanced than that:
>"I cordially dislike allegory in all its manifestations, and always have done so since I grew old and wary enough to detect its presence. I much prefer history – true or feigned– with its varied applicability to the thought and experience of readers. I think that many confuse applicability with allegory, but the one resides in the freedom of the reader, and the other in the purposed domination of the author."
It's a very fine distinction, arguably not even very distinct. Tolkien is basically saying "you can read it that way if you like or you can read it another way, it's up to you". That doesn't mean there ISN'T an allegorical parallel, Tolkien just fancies that the way he writes it, it can be applied to more than one relationship.
That's not what an allegory is you fricking stupid moron.
Tolkien himself makes the comparison, too.
>"squat, broad, flat-nosed, sallow-skinned, with wide mouths and slant eyes; in fact degraded and repulsive versions of the (to Europeans) least lovely Mongol-types"
Hrm...
Tolkien was no fool, no post modernist, no atheist. He understood that everything had a pattern, that there were going to be echoes of real peoples, real battles, real events, in anything he wrote, and he didn't arrogantly steer away from it, he just accepted it with humility and did not believe it should ever be a goal.
If you write about a foul, corrupted, degenerated race, you're going to see reflections, to various degrees, of every real people who have been made ugly in form and spirit.
If you write about sieges and victories and rescues and you're not an idiot, you're going to retread the past even if you DON'T know that's what you're doing.
In Tolkien's writing, Orcs are called "clever" craftsmen despite the crude and rough appearance of their gear. They are markedly weaker than ordinary humans, and shorter, basically splitting the difference between hobbit and man. The Uruk Hai, a huge improvement over regular orcs, were still smaller than the average human soldier.
In the films, Orcs are roughly the size of men, and appear to be similar strength on average, with some stronger, some weaker. Uruk hai are larger, and stronger than the average man.
Tolkien himself said Orcs were something like asiatic people but made horrifically ugly, so he couldn't have had the lowest opinion of Asiatics if he thought they had to be made *worse* to be an orc.
>orcs use state of the art ram
>humans use freshly cut wooden log
HMMMMM
Yeah, but what about the ghosts?
Literally nothing else could break the gate of Minas Tirith and the outer curtain walls were literally indestructible (made from same black stone as Isengard) and too high to scale with ladders. Grond was the only option, and even then not a single orc managed to cross the city gates.
gandalf should have teleported frodo into the magma
Aragorn wills his own death, you think the elves can't?
but it worked perfectly to do what it was designed for?
The question is, why did they bother to use the small one at first and not the one specifically designed for the task?
see
A hundred orcs or whatever is nothing. It's functionally zero cost.
Well, you're clearly not an orc, then.
The real issue is that they didn't bring it out immediately. They waste time and lives attacking the walls with small rams first, even thought this one was purpose built for the job and it's the only real fortress they have to content with.
It's the size of a skyscraper and would delay the attack by like a whole day, it would have been foolish of him to not at least test the defenses with his conventional weapons.
The morale bonus alone makes it worth it, and, in the end, it did it's job. The real question is what kind of tax policy was needed in subsiding to make it happen.
Sauron's Tax Policy is actually very progressive. He just glares at you and you willingly give him all of your money and resources to make him stop.
...These donations are then tax-deductible until next he feels like glaring at you.
GROND
nta, but Numenoreans were supposed to give up their kingship while they were old but still sound of mind/body and rather than letting themselves become "unmanned" with age, they would settle their affairs and willingly let themselves die. That stopped with Sauron's arrival, and ties in to the whole "restoring the holy lineage and customs to regenerate the people" bit Aragorn was doing.
It's in the Tale of Aragorn and Arwen in the appendices chapters of the ROTK, nobooks. He literally wills his body to die after giving the crown to his son, because without the will to accept death he will continue to linger on. Arwen goes on a grief-tour of the empty elven lands and then does the same.
Re: orcs and rape and elves in particular, Tolkien flip flopped on the subject in his notes and letters. Broadly he accepted that orcs probably had to breed conventionally (consensually or not), but didn't know how to fix that with his elven structure and toyed with the idea of elves dying if violated instantaneously (an idea revisited in an abandoned version of the Silmarillion where Morgoth tries to rape the Valar of the sun and her spirit departs in rage and leaves only her corpse as a burning but empty star). But as the other anon above said, Tolkien strongly implies that Elrond's wife was raped by orcs, thus her leaving for Amman for healing and her sons' serial killer tier hateboner for goblinkind
I'm Aldor son of Galdor from Anfalas Oblast. Denethor cannot rule and we must give up to Mordor and it's powerfull weapons. I am demoralised.
>Denethor has no projectiles and we must give up to Mordor
fixed
>Wood
While Mordor can build Lumber Mills, wood is not actually needed in producing the Mumakil unit. Only 1800 resources are required.
Sauron had access to a lot of lumber from Mirkwood and Rhun.
it is notably more efficient in design but held back in execution by incessant overengineering
it's funny because that's what Rammstein was accused of
GROND
Sauron wasn't the commander.
The commander of the orcs was GENERAL GOTHMOG.
He commanded everything on the ground. - excluding the ring wraiths.
>movie-only homosexual
OP posted a picture of the movie.
I don't get why so many people go so nuts over Lord of the Rings
I'm not saying you're required to enjoy it, I'm a contrarian myself but you really can't even understand why people like it? People credit Tolkien with redefining high fantasy single-handedly and if you don't understand why they say that look at the depth of his universe compared to the high fantasy/epic fantasy that came before him.
If you were white you'd understand
Lmfao, excellent reply.
Unironically the only real answer. It’s a white thing.
Rekt the dirty southron
I am white. I just cannot stand fantasy.
It's okay, not every white person can be born with a fully developed frontal lobe.
Is that why so many nerds gush over stupid fantasy races and gay spunding magic powers instead of finding more interesting things to do with their time?
Oh yeah because the brain drained autists that CANT participate in the most fundamental and ancient of humanity's traditions have turned out to be a real productive think tank.
Funny, my sword-and-sorcery-loving, DND-playing friends all have crippling ADHD, which is the exact opposite of a functioning front lobe.
>I am white. I just cannot stand fantasy.
I so wish we got to see what went on inside Barad-dur, its many courts and halls. Where Sauron would be holding councils with allied nations’ leaders and commanders, his general staff and lieutenants handling business, etc. I wonder if Sauron personally held court like Melkor had done, or if he was usually hanging around his pinnacle suites doing sorcery, far-sight, etc and let his staff handle everything else? Personally I think he would take after Melkor, especially if was starting to claim he was Melkor himself lol.
Also, let us look inside Minas Morgul ffs. Could Men even live in there or was it only orcs besides ghosts and whatever weird shit the Witch-King ruled over. Even after the fall of Sauron the place was ordered sealed so I bet there was some pretty heinous shit hanging around in there.
Man you people…where was it said that Bombadill was all-powerful? The Ring simply held no sway over him due to fundamental differences in his makeup vs Sauron’s. He held sway over a small realm, but it was directly stated that he would, eventually, fall to Sauron. Fall last as he is the first — but fall all the same. He didn’t have the strength to hold off Sauron forever, period.
Now, about Shelob. Where, exactly, did she COME from? Was she a distortion introduced into Arda by Melkor’s discordant notes? Another Maiar who went under the others’ radars? A being Melkor met in the void spaces and who smuggled her in?
> Now, about Shelob. Where, exactly, did she COME from?
She was a daughter of Ungoliant, who was basically Tolkien’s Cthulhu. An evil spirit that came from outside of the world and was so powerful that she almost killed Satan!Morgoth himself when he double crossed her.
>Tolkien’s Cthulhu
The frick was Tolkien's problem with spiders? They're based.
Spiders hands typed this post
Die you fricking monstruosity
But where are the arachne milkers?
the ones hiding in my shoes and door handles and sun visors are playing a dangerous game
where did we say that Bombadil was all-powerful?
Why can’t one of those magical beings in LOTR just conjure up a B-21 Raider armed with a neutron bomb and send it in the direction of Sauron?
How did GROND cross the river?
GROND GROND GROND GROND
>Saruman develops black powder and clearly his orcs are capable of some pretty large scale engineering projects (see: all that shit they did at Isengard)
>doesn't bother making firearms or even just loading trebuchets with his black powder explosives
To be fair, neither did Chinese until several centuries later when guns were introduced to them by the Euro's. b***hes literally used it only for smoke screens and give a slight boost to their arrows and sp00k some superstitious barbarian neighbors until the trick stopped working and moronic shit like that.
i'm not sure that building huge wooden siege towers was such a good idea when he had air superiority with the fellbeasts and could have just flattened all of his enemies using a ready supply of mined rocks.
although even with all that i wouldn't be surprised if he still allowed the ring to be destroyed.
>a man pretending to be a woman isn't troony behaviour
very sus indeed
The siege towers in the movie looked really impractical. They'd get stuck in the dirt really easily.
Charging the elephants was also dumb. Maybe Theoden thought they would get spooked, but even then, they'd be so dangerous to be around. Much better to just shoot them from afar.
He got rekt at Halms Deep then was stuck in his tower before the could share the tech with his boss. Plus he wanted to overthrow Sauron anyway so there was no point in helping him.
Religion is a mental illness.
A bridge
>Religion is a mental illness
Reminder that israelites and atheists vote identically on every issue, excepting where atheists vote further left. 92% of atheists, when polled, strongly support gay disease riddled pedo ass fricking (homosexuality).
The vast majority of atheists are anti gun, and vote anti gun with more consistency than any other group. If there was a race with that statistic /k/ would be calling for their genocide.
I guess, I am anti-gun. I don't think morons like you should be armed.
Grow up.
>99% of your people are robbers
>Das impossible cus I aint one.
>*BEEP*
Ah a wise man once said that if you talk about trends in a group, and someone feels compelled to talk about individual counter examples, you know you're talking to a merchant, a woman, a jogger, or someone so brain broken that they've started to resemble them.
what the frick are you even talking about schizo
>I guess, I am anti-gun
Get the frick out gay.
He breeched the gates of Gondor. He did his duty. Don't you dare diss my chad boy Grond!
Need HQ version