Have you actually planned what to do in the event of a zombie apocalypse? I have. There's a security company down the road from where I live. I plan to go there stock up on weapons and get one of their armored trucks. Then I'll go to a mall and lock everything up. What about you, anons? Did you make plans for a zombie apocalypse?
rape
Including the zombies?
The zombies will take care of them.
So you'll just roam around?
>So you’ll just roam around
No I would go to a distribution center and just load up as much food (if not stay there) as I could
and hold up somewhere low key until shit calmed down
>The zombies will take care of them.
The equipment didn't save them but it'll save you?
>Including the zombies
especially the zombies
>The zombies will take care of them.
if they'll take care of the guys who are already equipped, what do you think will happen to you before then?
>The zombies will take care of the people with weapons and armored trucks so I can get their weapons and an armored truck
Fantastic plan moron
You'd become a zombie day 1
How are you going to get those things from the people who are already there? You would get killed trying to take them.
This
Your plan is fricking stupid and every idiot like you in the area will have the same idea. Theyre not gonna give that stuff away and Theyre not gonna let you in. Youll be one of the first to die
Yes I would kill ever woke tard I could find
And creat an ear necklace
A treasured memento
>rc helicopter or drone
>attach remote controlled sound emitter
>fly it near a group of zombies
>lead them away
>move while the coast is clear
That's a great idea. Thanks, anon.
So you've identified a place to do this?
>battery life: 15 minutes
Just buy chink commercial drones they use for war like dji mavic pro
frick zombies
listen here
you get a drone prefereably a couple
you attach speakers to it
you fly them out to sentinal island
then you blast the cavemen with crazy frog 24/7
within 3 days they drop their sharade
>fly my bigger and better rc heli/drone above you
>start blasting rick assley
>laugh my ass off while you sperging, cursing and running from zombies while you crash you own rc hrli/drone
>I will loot your body afterwards
Heck yeah
Climb up ladder
Remove ladder
Sit back and wait for it to all blow over
better go to The Winchester
>Go to the mall
This is such a meme
Obviously one of those distribution centers would be the chad move as they would have a shit tone of food and generator backed up refrigeraton
Also less likely to attract attention
>distribution centers
Do you mean where stocks are kept before they're distributed to the stores? I don't know where they are in my city though and I'm not sure they're all-concrete with those metal things that drop down.
>those metal things that drop down
Doors?
Anon there would be no time to worry about music.
anon if you can't rock some sick beats while surviving the zombie apocalypse then whats the point?
I appreciate your 80's/90's sitcom humor, anon.
I'd learn to shoot so I can do this.
Not just getting the axe and smashing the slow zombie's heads, why?
He was injured and couldn't even get that zombie off of him.
In what season of Justified did they start having zombies?
This show keeps impressing me. Each season, it enters undiscovered countries of shitty tv.
I still have no clue why this was needed.
The entire time he could have ran up and killed those zombies. There was an axe right there.
what the frick is cricket from it's always sunny doing in a zombie apocalypse?
Why not just run up and bash the two, spread apart slow moving creatures in the head?
because the ep was about that character being a trick shooter so he did a trick shot at the end the scene itself however made no sense
the only way this would have made sense is if there was some kind of gap or river preventing him from reaching dwight in time
This is a comedy, right?
unintentional comedy yes
I don't believe that someone sat down and wrote this scene, thinking people would take it seriously.
I already explained
the scene itself was the fault of the director, a split shot is far from impossible but the entire setup and situation is ludicrous
I've seen this before, and it's the most Indian clip I've ever witnessed in a (presumably) Hollywood production
If they wanted to show this guy being an impressive marksman, and take out two zombies with one bullet, why not just have him position himself precisely so he lines up the zombies in front of him and pierces through one head to hit the one behind it. Achieves the exact same thing as this completely moronic scene and it's perfectly possible.
because the director of this ep is an idiot, he could also have done a ricochet shot thats also a professional trick shooter can do, and the split the bullet thing is something they can do but not like that dwights axe would be moving and would move the moment the bullet hit it fricking up the shot you cannot do that its not even remotely possible hence why the scene is memed its really stupid
I would just go get bitten ASAP and enjoy being immortal
I live in an island so assumedly the virus won't even reach us, however we would all slowly starve.
Can't you plant stuff, raise chickens etc?
No
Do it you lazy fricker
How?
Doesnt take much room to do it
You can get compact planters for potatoes that simplify the process significantly.
Yeah you can get them for like 20 bucks off the internet, and improvising them is also not difficult. Grow potatoes on your patio.
>world has gone to shit
>just use amazon bro
I'm saying buy them NOW idiot.
I don't want potatoes. I just want sex.
But you can have both. b***hes love potatoes.
>chad is fricking stacy in a mall somewhere
>potato boy over here attracts the hambeasts who observed him planting stuff on his porch
pottery
Why
>grows 18 golf ball sized potatoes in 6 months
Yeah just magically get some chickens and land while you share space with 90 thousand other people
Do you live on a prison island? Is it so cramped you can't find a little room for plants and a chicken coop?
If there aren't zombies they're still going to try and act like there is law and for several months
How does that stop anyone from planting potatoes etc?
Don't own the land
Use a barrel. Youtube vids teach you how to do it
Yeah I'll just find a magic barrel
Buy, trade, barter, steal one if you must
I'll got to prison
Just do it bc cheeky Nandos won't be an option
How can I find out who owns a barrel when Internet is down
Form a group and/or go to a supply store
It doesn't have to be magical.
How do I grow a barrel?
he probably thinks you live in tahiti or some other kino island with emerald green waters and white sand, coconuts and fish everywhere
The only island that seems to crowded to plant stuff is the capital of the Maldives and even there there's probably some available patch of land
Potato loicense.
You can't just plant potatoes lol. The ones you buy from the shops are sterilised and won't grow. You need seed potatoes. 90% of you morons will starve to death waiting months for plants that won't grow or produce anything lol.
Objectively wrong
yes you can wtf? get some potatos go chuck them in a compost heap or anywhere really, come but in 3 months, you will have more, same works for onions they are ridiculously east to grow
What kind of shitty island is this? Do you live on a barren rock in the middle of the ocean?
Nice try zombie.
Yes. I'm going to encase my head in concrete with embedded sharp spikes. Then after it sets I'm gonna get bit and become a sub-boss.
>dies of brain starvation
some boss
if it’s the walking dead rules he would become one anyways
hmm, if you use too much concrete your head might just tear off under the weight though
ur zombie limbs would just be cut off or smashed apart dummy
you'd have to wear body armor if you don't want to become a zombie cripple
Great shit.
>can’t bite anyone
you would be harmless
Depending on how much effort it would take to survive, I would probably just get it over with and die. Maybe get bitten or whatever.
Zombies don't scare me. Lack of comforts scare me.
>My plan is to walk unarmed in lair of the high trust gun enjoyers gang who have a thousands of guns and need someone to do the women
I'm a type 1 diabetic. I don't think insulin can be stockpiled. It's perishable. I bet those vials sitting in some pharmaceutical warehouse will be worthless after a year.
And good luck making it myself. I heard it's produced by some type of bacteria. I'd have to culture that bacteria in some lab. C'mon now.
I think you could just make your own if you tried anon, it really isn't that hard
After running around to survive for hundreds of miles your fat ass will shed the weight and you’ll be naturally cured of your diabetes.
he's type 1
Is that the good diabetes?
No. Type 2 is the one you can live with by just stop eating sugar.
>I plan to go there stock up on weapons and get one of their armored trucks.
you can make insulin ouit of sheep
>how
I don't know I never asked because my pancreas is good and works properly
but you can do it
I'd find my brother and stick with him, no matter what.
kill myself
My plan is taking all your shit.
hi negan
I live somewhere hot so they'd all get eaten by maggots or burn up from constant daytime sun
I live out in the sticks and I could probably survive here indefinitely. I think I'd just wait it out, do some gardening, maybe go in with some of the boys to get supplies we can't produce here periodically.
Honestly I don't see zombie apocalypses as being really daunting unless they're like the fast-zombie kind. Seems like a city-folk kind of concern.
Lots of zombie fiction seems to have them eventually leaving cities when they are at max numbers. It's delaying the attack in a sense
>flee to rural/remote place
>1000 other city people have same idea
>guaranteed a couple of them are already infected
you've either got to become a nomad or go somewhere nobody else is which would have to be longer than the infection period away from major travel hubs or infected areas. Also factoring in the zombie natural wandering.
People don't like inconvience so head into mountains or areas cars cannot safely travel.
Or just stay in my house and do whatever it is I want to do with the 9 months of water and food and try not to go crazy and THEN go outside. I guess I'd have time to kit out my greenhouse and I'd probably have to try and figure out a water solution though, for sustainability. I don't really see anyone trying to break in, I'm not remote but I'm not in a super dense area, and I'd just shoot them before they saw me anyway. Even if it's a group, a semi auto rifle moves faster than they can react, guaranteed. They'd have to know I was there and plan on it.
So you would just murder women?
Yes.
>Look outside, see young woman fricking with my gate 120ish feet away
Enjoy hell, stupid, see ya!
>BANG
I don't want to clean up the body though
Bro you don't kill women, period.
I would kill a woman on her period, sure. What does that have to do with anything? The zombies probably smell the blood anyway.
This.
You have to go your own way. Give it a few weeks before you start looting etc.
i live so far out in the sticks my little shithole town is sub 200 people, maybe sub 100. i am pretty safe out here
Do you have fast internet?
Go to the pub, grab a pint and wait for all of it to blow over
Cheers, mate
Wear Knight's armor and duct tape a massive zweihander to my hands then fight until I get infected. When I turn I'll be a legendary zombie all the survivors talk about
bullets would go right through easy peasy dumb anon
no they wouldn't this has been proven over and over and over again, not him but properly made plate armor is bullet proof, or even shittily made armor see NED FRICKING KELLY you idiot
>it was bulletproof in 1880
Right obviously nothing has changed in 140ish years.
moron.
that anon said "wear knights armor" he didn't say wear some shitty modern knock off
Fine.
Obviously nothing has changed in 500ish years.
Giant moron.
you lost accept it, plate armor is 100% bullet proof deal and move on
What made you think I was trying to change your mind?
Colossal moron.
deal with your error and move on
Deal with your moronation.
Knights armor however is not.
which knight from what century?
>trip you
>laugh as you flop around like a turtle on its back
>wait for military blockades to get overrun
>lots of armored cars and tanks and guns just sitting around
>become a warlord
>cannibalism just for the lols
>invent some new blood god that everyone in my society has to pray for and make sacrifices to
>capture slaves and make them grow crops for me
>make a colosseum and have gladiator fights
Yeah it will be based
just for the lols
If you're lucky you won't get prion sickness. There are some humans who've actually evolved for eating other humans
Bro everyone knows you don’t eat the brain of a human and you don’t eat the liver of a polar bear that’s basic knowledge
What’s the deal with polar bear liver - mercury?
Vitamin A overdose. It's lethal in even very small amounts
Thanks. Stocking that one away for my Arctic Adventure arc.
Venmo me 25$ and I’ll spoonfeed you for 5 minutes
I'm pretty sure you can get prion sickness from eating any part of the human body
Also I'm pretty sure that's eating uncooked brain
Also I think the polar bear thing is a toxicity thing
Please look all this up for me
I have looked it up anon, you can only get prion disease and kuru from eating brains and it takes 20-50 years to manifest. Additionally I have l learned that you can't get any diseases or sicknesses that the human you had assuming you fully cook the human meat. Furthermore, it seems human meat is, in theory of course, very nutritional.
So tl;dr:
Don't eat brain, cook your humans well done.
>t. Mexican
>Go the the Winchester and wait for it to blow over
Every woman on Tinder response this standard question they have on their site for some reason.
Or could be Bumble I cant remember it I deleted it.
Yes there are even some of them in this very thread
simple. I would hire an exorcist.
This book is a good read if you like fantasy survival shit.
There was a part I remember :
As the survivors, you can go in the back of a moving truck with spears and make noise. The horde will follow you if you go slowly enough over a long road, and you can destroy their brain with the spears and "clean" a good amount of infected that way. There are a lot of fun ideas like that in the book.
What do you do if the truck runs out of gas or overturns?
The nerd who wrote the book has never been outside so he can’t answer that
You're fricked, obviously. This specific example is in the aftermath part of the book, where survivors are organized enough to start taking back land from the infected, so they're supposed to have good equipment.
I doubt thrusting through human skulls with (most likely) wooden spears is as easy as that book makes it sound.
That's a rotten human skull, basically a tomato.
At that point wouldn't the zombies be crumpling down and breaking apart under their own weight anyways?
I also remember that when you die your bones instantly turn to jelly
again this is later once you are organized and equipped, scrap metal is readily available even now, after their would be so much you'd be using aluminum spear shafts with steel heads easy
He addressed in World War Z that a lot of ideas were dumb because he assumed everyone lived in America, and as such had an easy access to firearms
>Have
No
Why would a security company have guns there? Security guards have to buy their own guns.
zombies aren't ever going to be a problem but there's a very close equivalent. they aren't dead but were flown in force to every first world country.
I live in an apartment building in Tokyo. No garden, no chance of getting out of the city to somewhere rural and of course no weapons more threatening than a kitchen knife.
I'd just ration out the food in my apartment to try to survive for as long as possible and hold out in the hope that the government came to sort things out. Not much else I could do since the number of zombies would be hopelessly high.
maybe you'd get luck and most others would abandon the apartment complex leaving the whole building to you, you could potentially last a long time in those circumstances, make sure to fill up every bath in every apartment before the mains are cut
Fricking idiot, just go to any highshool and let the katana wielding cuties take care of the zambies.
No high schools nearby.
Would an elementary school do?
I'll have to research more anime to be sure.
Simple.
Rappel down the building WWZ style
practical infowar technique - find out who's screeching about the apocalypse online and who're near you.
they're likely to have plenty of food and weaponry stockpiled and you can take it from them trivially by pretending to be a moron that they can use for heavy labor(all of these types have a savior complex if they talk about themselves online)
i own a remote mountain cabin with a nearby lake, so i'll probably head out there and just ride it out
what will you eat?
fish, deer various berries
my dad took me hunting and fishing since i was 9 so i have no issues living self sufficiently
you need more veg then, a man cannot live on protein and berries alone also vitamin supplements would be a good move
thanks for the tip, will raid some stores and pharmacies on the 8 hour drive up there
good man
My dad was an opiate addict who died when i was 9. Let me guess, you think you're a self made man.
Minge
I'll take it from you
yeah ill get on a roof with some molotovs and wait for them to mass up and then chuck one from time to time
no because if corpses were to reanimate they dont have any muscles to move anyways. yeah ill go pee in their zombie faces while they sit there unable to move
you must be fun at parties
I have am wearing a motorcross armor covered in ducktape and wielding makeshift blunt objects to smash zombies heads in like watermelons.
you better be somewhere cold or will quickly succumb to heat exhaustion
If by zombie apocalypse you mean global Black person chimpout then yea, i have a few plans. they only involve going innawoods after all hope is lost at my own home. i have a few locations picked out already and i always keep enough gasoline in gas cans at my house so i can have enough fuel to bug out if i need to.
i wouldn't use a motorcycle though, a mob could easily knock you off it and kill you, much rather be in a car or a truck then you can plow your way through.
I think a wetsuit would be the best way of not getting bitten. also hiking boots, gloves a rugby helmet and some kind of plastic facemask.
goddamn you would look weird though.
If the military and riot police were somehow unable to deal with a bunch of shambling morons i don't think I'd be able to either.
guys just find the hottest zombie girl you can and make here your sex slave
>kill or a cat or dog and use it's brain for bait
>wearing gloves and protective clothes then tie her up
>use pillers to remove teeth and nails
>rip off a finger and rub it on some pets rats and wait a week to see if they turn, if not, rape away
there you got a hot ass zombie gf
also for the lolz make "bugout bags" duffels I write "bugout bag" on. I fill them with flying roachs and roach food I buy online,so when surviors open them a million roachs scare them.
Lots of ropes and ladders. Will live/travel on roofs and use ropes to get shit from bellow. Using ladders as makeshift bridges.
Weapons are for idiots. Noise will bring hordes to you. You may survive a week, but when there's 500 frickers that your gun noises in a now noiseless world as attracted to you, you're fricking fricked. Same with cars. If you use one, you'll have to keep moving all the time. When you stop your car the noise you made 10 seconds before stopping your car won't magically stop zombies from converging on the last place they heard a noise from.
Anyone got a young daughter to trade me for a gun and some ammo?
I already have chickens, quail, a large pond with tons of fish, plenty of trees, and a garden. Plus stored food and lots of guns and ammunition. I'd be set for about a week until someone figures out I have all that, then Im fricked.
>I'd be set for about a week until someone figures out I have all that, then Im fricked.
It's refreshing to see someone acknowledge that this is the case, everyone always thinks they're going to be a fricking warlord because they prepped a bit
Who gives a shit about becoming a warlord? No one who comes here could ever be a warlord. If you live in a remote area and have never told anyone about how well prepared you are, you will be fine. Honestly it will be the boredom that will get to most of us.
I think I remember the gunslinger from that walking dead axe gif having a similar situation until some blonde qt floated down the river to his cabin.
Zombie Crows will get ya.
I find this man and ask him to save me
>Stabs you to death
>Says "nice hiss" as your last breath leaves your body
mre jesus would never do something like that
Then he'll make canned meat out of you
no he has all the equipment to make his own mres now, I am unfortunately going to become a freeze-dried casserole, I hope I make a nice hiss
Nice
Is it too hard to grab HD picture off Google images?
A bicycle is probably the best method of single person travel in a Zombie apocalypse. Self propelled, low on sound. As long as they are just walkers and you avoid any big groupings you should be fine
>low on sound
when was the last time you cycled fatty, you're telling me the zombies are gonna ignore you huffing and puffing, the chain rattling, the whole frame jangling as you hit a bump or even a rock?
even the fanciest carbon fiber light as air bikes have these issues
he said low on sound, not soundless. Besides kayaks gliding downstream, what is a soundless option?
I'm just going to skip out on the whole rigamarole and kill myself.
>I'm just going to skip out on the whole rigamarole and kill myself.
This. I barely manage to get out of bed despite mom making me tendies every day and a computer with access to all the kino on earth. Take that from me and I don't really see the point any more
I would continue living for as long as I can just to see the world in its new form
the idea of everything going to shit and actual freedom becoming available is exciting to me
>Have you actually planned what to do in the event of a zombie apocalypse?
im not a redditor circa 2008
I would kill myself as humanely as possible (opiates carbon monoxide sleeping pills etc)
Adding a failsafe post-mortem brain destruction device if it's that kind of zombies
Reditgay detected.
you'd be the guy who gets bit by a zombie and purposely walks into a maternity ward before dying
I’d be like Colombus from Zombieland, but with more autism. I’d also pick an AR-15 or pump action shotgun over a double barrel break action.
yea with all his autism why did he never get a better weapon, unless something about the break action makes it super reliable with easy to find ammo or something
>super reliable
It is, and some people are real fast at reloading it.
ok fair enough, still only 2 bullets what about a lever action? better /k/gay yes?
I've never seen a lever action shotgun in person.
the autist in zombiland isn't using a shotgun either
Yeah, I'd die.
I'd try to start some large fire, blast loud noises to attract as many zombies as I could. Maybe I'd try to use my houses gas as a final ka-boom.
What is there to plan? Zombies are the lamest of all movie monsters. They're just slower, dumber versions of normal humans.
What if they were speedy ones
Lone wolf it.
Live like Rambo.
Totes. I live two blocks from the friendly neighborhood completely decriminalized marijuana distributor. The local heads and I will rondezvous there and take over, since they have a pretty high tech security system that should be plenty good enough to keep zombies out. So we're locked all snugly in with a mondo stash of numerous kinds of weed to keep us calm throughout the crisis. Plus they have an on site ATM, so we can just order Ubereats or whatevs when we need food. I'm tellin' ya. I'll be living large come the ZA, compadres. Looking forward to it.
not exactly but i live by 3 or 4 huge supermarkets, so i'd rush the local police station and grab as many guns and ammo as i could and then i'd try to bunker in one of them and shoot dead anyone who came near, living or undead, the first few weeks would be critical as i'd imagine lots of people would try to raid it for supplies but it'd get easier as time went by and normies got filtered by the elements
>so i'd rush the local police station and grab as many guns and ammo as i could
You'd get shot by a cop or someone else with the same idea
>I'll just waltz slowly into the empty police station and use all the supplies that are still there
moron
I did in my teenage years. Nowadays I have a bug out plan to a remote property, which mostly covers the same essentials as a zombie plan. Right now, Zombie is more like an emergency what if protocol to consider when the bug out happens. Slow zombies don't change much, fast zombies requires a bit more finesse, smart zombies I pray to the good Lord.
Why not just go to deserts, the hot or cold kind?
rotting flesh wont do good in either i reckon
i'll go the wandering samurai route
weapon: katana
transportation: bicycle
Planning for a zombie apocalypse is cope for non-participation in your own life.
You desire a swift and sudden release from the internalized emotional and social pressures you feel but in a way that requires no willpower on your own part. You wish to keep your victimhood while being liberated from its consequences.
The reason you chose such an impossible and unlikely scenario is that it allows you the comfort of perpetually putting it in a hypothetical future, unlike a mass power outage or nuclear war; which would actually make life quite bleak and likely only increase your burdens and strengthen the bonds between you and those you feel controlled by.
If one day you should separate yourself from these pressures you will find the fantasy completely ridiculous and absurd, and hopefully learn that there is nothing which exists today that would be made better by a horde of slow moving brain eaters who fortunately have consumed everyone but you and presumably a few people who would consider you to be some kind of authority for no presentable reason.
Keep moving, travel light, keep hair short, clothing tight. Best method of transport will be silent so probably a bicycle. Head north.
This is assuming they're regular zombies and not like 28days later rage virus "zombies" in that situation I and most everyone else are fricked
I'd probably just die.
No survival skills, can't shoot, only mildly in shape.
People all think they're going to be the Rick Grimes of the zombie apocalypse, but in reality 99% of the population gonna be gone pretty quick. Unless you're an unironic prepper with a bu kernel and a stash lf supplies, you should probably just throw in the towel.
I'm a security patrolman so I have keys to shopping complexes, stadiums, factories etc.
Always figured I'd go to work and take keys then go set up wherever.
Taking a shit at a bowls club atm, its got a broken fence, but there is heaps of food and drink inside, I note that down mentally.
Since I go inside these places to reset alarms or escort staff, I know their layouts and I'm pretty sure I could survive for years on all these places I can get access too without breaking in.
Some long-term storage facilities are already fortresses.
>There's a security company down the road from where I live. I plan to go there stock up on weapons and get one of their armored trucks. Then I'll go to a mall and lock everything up.
Everyone is gonna go there you idiot and how are you gonna get in?
>i was watching the walking dead and then i was like 'woah dude, what if this was like real life though'
being moronic may be a big disadvantage in the fallout wet-dream video game future you're all fantasizing about.
>DUDE WE NEED A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE TO THIN OUT THE HUMAN POPULATION, THERES TOO MANY HUMANS ON EARTH
>completely ignores current birth rate demographics
why?
>gather enough food to last me for years
>hide out in a room with the only way out being a very narrow passageway that only one walker can go through at a time
>if a walker approaches me i’ll just stab it in the eye
ez pz
Zombies aren't real and even the more realistic SHTF preppers are moronic, so no. I do have emergency food, water and first aid supplies that I cycle out as needed. I have lots of outdoor stuff and go on week long hunting trips every few years, but I live in the city, and if any sudden civilization destroying event occurs, no amount of prepping outside basic emergency preparedness will significantly increase any city dweller's chances.
>zombies aren't real
you are fricking kidding me really?
Just build a tree house and shoot shit. Zombies cant climb trees.
What makes you think you'll be able to break into a fricking security company you mongolian.
This is during the Boudicca revolt. The Britons were incensed beyond belief and mustered the largest army the warbands had ever seen, one of the largest ever rallied against Rome, the barbarian uprising that Rome had lived in terror of. The Britons were physically superior to the shorter Romans, their morale was sky-high, their combined military wisdom was unrivaled in their entire barbarian history, they had a superior lay of the land and were used to a more brutal style of warfare, and they marched to repel the invaders from their land.
The casualties were 200 to 1, with the permanent dissolution of the Barbarian morale as they were led to a slaughter in spite of their advantages. The Romans took position with their back to a narrow pass, negating Boudicca's ability to encircle and properly utilize her superior numbers. Moreover, the barbarians had trapped themselves with their carts, so their families could watch what was certain to be a glorious victory against Rome, and in doing so their retreat was slowed and prevented. The Romans waited for the barbarians to come close and let loose with javelins, then closed in a wedge formation and simply hacked them apart. The Roman auxiliaries took the flanks to expand the line, and the cavalry charged resolute bands when they reformed for another assault, shattering their spirits with lance and thundering hooves.
These were brave and strong men, with half a brain and weapon in hand, and they were put to rout and mercilessly hacked to pieces by nothing more than decent armor, intelligent planning, and iron-age shortswords. Remove the courage and strength, the intelligence and weapons, and enhance the armor, intelligence and weaponry of the Romans, and you'll see my general blueprint. Sickness is a worse concern than death in battle against a rotting corpse.
It was her turn you f*got chud
Imagine trusting Wikipedia ~~*they*~~ right the articles and not only that R*mans were just that eras j*wish golem. It didn't happen like that but even if it did you're celebrating j*wish subversion against Europeans
I'm fairly certain there were other israelites going around in that time, actually, anon
Ultimate woman moment
>the greatest trained military to ever exist so much so every single successful nation ever since has modeled themselves on them beat a horde of barbarians
this isn't news mate but well said regardless
Honestly, kill every liberal I find, because they will be the first people to turn their backs or betray everyone else in the group.
But won't you be pre-betraying them then?
>Gather vegetables, soil and planters we already have at home
>Stock up on food
>Climb up to the upper floor of my apartment block and clog the floor beneath us with big wooden, iron and plastic furniture. An entire hallway of it
>This ensures we have access to the upper elevator door even if the elevator itself is not working
>Invade the apartment upstairs, outnumber and kill whoever is inside (I think it is a single old man)
>Leave the tap running and fill up as many garbage bags with water as we can, maybe only halfway so the plastic doesn't tear due to the weight. Tie them up, try to store as much water as we can while the tap still works
>Charge all devices to max while we can. Download as much homesteading, DIY and general health information as I can
>Build raincatchers on the roof. Plant vegetables
>Live inside the isolated upper apartment and the roof for sunshine & air
>Figure out how to minimize food consumption by mastering fasting & hydration
>If the planters don't work and the food runs out, go scavenging by jumping on nearby rooftops (the whole street is pretty much connected)
>Hope to outlast the virus / get picked up by a helicopter
Roofchads. We won
2015 posting
>What about you, anons?
I will kill everybody I hate, which is to say, everybody.
>ends your zombie apocalypse
Nothing personnel yo
>runs out of fuel
>duck hunt for other survivors
Not a good plan
>>runs out of fuel
I guess I will have to return to my apocalyptic compound before I run out of fuel, moron.
>I took over your compound and fricked your slave gfs while you were out playing games
Nothing personnel kiddo. It's my compound now or what I call it: the cumpound.
>Ride loudest vehicle on earth
>Expect to both never get stuck and breakdown amidst thousand dead bodies roll
>Expect schizos who waited all their life for zombies to not kill him
Dumb Black person
*snipes u for waking me up*
I'm coming by your house with cheetos
Maggots will eat all the zombies in the planet in like 20 days anon
Better stock up on fly eggs and like, beer and pizza for 2 weeks and that's it
Holy crap I never thought about this. Zombies are not viable in any way fricking insects will deal with the problem in a couple weeks.
It's understandable that you are unable to understand why that is mathematically impossible because humans just can't properly conceptualise very large numbers.
I only started to work it out when working out how many tonnes of ash 6 million people would make.
How many?
An unhidable amount.
Actually I heard they made soap out of it and snorted the rest believing it will give them unnatural fighting abilities. Get educated.
Steal a van, then go to the university so I can kidnap half a dozen or so young roasties who I will use to bargain for food/weapons etc while also raising a new generation of incels who will inherit the earth.
Frick zombdicky then kill myself
I'd secure my family's land, it is already fenced in. We have several tools and vehicles, the soil is the most fertile in the country. I would also learn to drive a motorcycle because no one can tell me what i'm doing is illegal. And I I would start growing a bunch of stuff. Like the devil's lettuce. I'd have good hunting grounds.
I'd make sure my senpai that we all collect at our land. Then we'd frick up anyone threatening us
>I would also learn to drive a motorcycle because no one can tell me what i'm doing is illegal
Why are zombies a threat? They are don't have self-preservation instinct and will follow in any trap like in Resident evil final chapter.
My plan is to go into my loft where all my supplies are, pull up the ladder, and sit quietly for a couple of weeks until the initial chaos is over, then see if I can make it to the river about 2 miles away, and take a boat out to the estuary, then look for a big boat before heading to an island I know about. Hopefully, it will be pretty empty because the owners are apparently Americans, so I doubt they will have made it there.
I live on a house boat so I'm already set.
>Have you actually planned what to do in the event of a zombie apocalypse?
Became Nemesis, kill all zombies all billions of them.
Every time I see a thread about this, some anon says "lmao just get a spears bro".
Why are spears so popular for zombie nuts?
Would they even be useful?
>can kill zombies from 6ft away
>stabby or slashy
>cross braces can hold them back
>nice for walking
spear + mace is peak, wear leather/kevlar and a helmet so they can't bite.
>gotta poke the fricker only on the head and through to the brain
>feels like spearing an olive with a toothpick that is 10 feet long
Only knife Chads and blunt force trauma bois thrive in the TWD world
Also, I would LARP a whole lot of stuff
I think the one assumption everyone always makes is that they're somehow going to be home or otherwise able to actually get out of wherever they are. What if you're at the store and zombies surround it? Or at a doctor's appointment?
In all likelihood most of us probably wouldn't even make it home to hunker down.
>Have you actually planned what to do in the event of a zombie apocalypse?
Wake up and go to work. We're all zombies already.
I've got 30 mags and about 3500 rounds just for my AR15, so I guess I'd just blast zombies till they stop coming then do whatever.
>all these crazy ideas
I would literally just lock myself at home for a few days and wait until all the zombies rotted away. The "apocalypse" would last for a week max. But imagine the smell afterwards lol
According to TWD, the only long term survivors will be psychopaths and dumbasses who can't even remember a week earlier that they saw zombies pick up their stuffed animals, use rocks to break glass, turn doorknobs, and climb fences. I wouldn't just casually walk/drive everywhere, forgetting about ambushes, said psychopaths, or that loud fricking motorcycles will call the zombies right to my house, either. Why prepare? I'm a goner.
The attack helicopter against zombies works pretty well
Starve to death hiding in my attic most likely
Hey hoarder/preppergays:
How you gonna stop me and 100 other raiders from banding together and taking all your shit?
Who wants to get shot first? After the first 5 or 6 houses you hit I expect your elan will be much depleted.
But nevermind that, why do you muh raider gays always assume like minded people won't organize in response? Or already be loosely organized as is while you'll have to come together as you go.
I assure you, if a couple hundred morons like you try to come down on my community those that survive will be hanged alongside the highway.
sorry me and my raiders beat you to the punch and are now raping all your female relatives and your dogs
B-but I'm a raider too! You can't do this!
stop trying to talk while my peter is in your mouth dude youre ruining this for both of us
>ez
>randomly bursts into flames
It's surrounded by water stupid I'll just splash some on it
Yes I have.
I figured I'd grab a bunch of frying pans as DIY maces. the handle is a hell of a weak point though, it'd probably need reinforcement. still, you can find them in any kitchen on the planet.
I'm just gonna stay home and UberEATS all my food
Just get a dozer or a snowplough and you're golden. Zombie apocalypse makes no sense they're literally moronic people that can be outsmarted in million different ways