GIMME YO SHET!

Oh shit all those training videos you watched are about to come out. What are you doing?

250 Piece Survival Gear First Aid Kit

LifeStraw Water Filter for Hiking and Preparedness

250 Piece Survival Gear First Aid Kit

  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >N-No.
    >turn 360 degrees and moonwalk away

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Get shot.
      Feel my fingers in your pockets as you fade out.
      I kick you on the ground for good measure.
      Now what?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        die, probably

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        if I'm gonna get shot anyway, imma pull my pants down first and air out the boys.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >ANON DOOD!
        >WAT NOU

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >You shoot
        >Ackwardly do the michael kick with my level IV armor soles
        >deflect the round
        >Perform the flip from the music video Smooth Criminal
        >Send your soul to be raped for being ignorant

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Shoot him with 9mm
        >He is on the ground... laughing at you
        >Emotional Damage
        >You have a nice day
        >9mm bounces off your face

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        do i have to get shot before or after you feel me up?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Feel my fingers in your
        Kinda gay

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Laugh as you touch my wiener while fingering my pockets because I cut those out of every pair of pants I own so I can jerk off in public. Then with my dying breath" homie, you gay"

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >What are you doing?
        I throw my box of Hornets at him (never leave home with out them), while he is distracted I run away so I don’t get stung too.

        >Now what?
        I hope that he grabs either the Centipede in my pocket or jabs himself on the needles I found at the park (hopefully one of them was used by a AIDS sufferer)

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Get shot.
      Feel my fingers in your pockets as you fade out.
      I kick you on the ground for good measure.
      Now what?

      Honestly when I was younger and dumb and selling weed, I had a guy basically do this to me when I went to drop off an ounce of dro (430 bucks back in the day that’s wild when I think about it)
      I literally just did a 180 and walked off and nothing happened.

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I turn 360° and walk away

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I rum towards him shooting one handed with my eyes closed, thrusting my arm forward to make the bullets go faster, like 90% of civilian self defense videos. You'll 007s might as well just carry a noisemaker to scare the monkeys off.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This guy and the one in the Subway that shot the two robbers are the GOATs of defensive shooting videos.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Anon I posted this as a terrible example of what to do in a defensive situation lmao, you really are 007s

        Rate this one...

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          That old man gentrified the frick out of those crime-doers huh.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The gold standard 10/10

          >Tactical boomer waddle to close distance to target
          >wrist firmly supported on follow-up shots
          >hand jabbing forward on final shot for extra velocity

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >stop a robbery/ potential murder
          >somehow they failed at defending themselves
          Were you expecting them to pop the melon of each future doctor in less than a second?

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Hickok45 goes west

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Holy frick I’m 21 and dress just like that boomer

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous
    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      At moment that the driver ran after the robbers, would that still classified as self-defenses? He's still inside his garage.
      I'm not against it but after apple river incident I have a harder time understand this type of situation.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Apple river guy was fricked because he lied to the police and the jury could infer mea culpa, that the defendant knew what he did was wrong. I think a reasonable person could have found the old man being attacked as self defense absent tge lying.
        If you actually defended yourself then you had better make a small statement to the police, something to the effect of "I was attacked and defendes myself." then shut up and assert your right to counsel.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        100% self defense. He doesn’t know if they have guns themselves they are still a threat and on his property.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        my dad tells a story about how one night in his 20's he woke up to his car alarm going off, and some doctor or lawyer was pulling the radio out of his car. he chased the guy down the street and shot at him a couple times before realizing he'd probably be fricked if he hit the guy.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      At moment that the driver ran after the robbers, would that still classified as self-defenses? He's still inside his garage.
      I'm not against it but after apple river incident I have a harder time understand this type of situation.

      YES. How does he know they are not just taking cover to regroup and continue the crime?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      9mm strikes again

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >There was a gunfight

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    If he's further away and alone, I just toss my wallet to the ground and kill him while he picks it up. If not, I hand him my stuff, pretend to leave, then come back and kill him.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >and kill him while he picks it up.
      You will be sentenced for murder if you do that btw. Because he is no longer a threat and you can just leave.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Then I kill myself too homosexual.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Does he still have a gun drawn while committing a crime against me? Sounds like a threat to me.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >You will be sentenced for murder if you do that btw.
        No you won't.
        >Because he is no longer a threat and you can just leave.
        He's absolutely a threat who may or may not let you leave. He's also still a threat to my property and committing a felony. Perfectly good shoot. Stand your ground.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        That's for a jury to decide Black person

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      https://i.imgur.com/SxHRPUH.png

      >and kill him while he picks it up.
      You will be sentenced for murder if you do that btw. Because he is no longer a threat and you can just leave.

      i asked bing and it said you can slot the guy no problem

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >What are you doing?
    A 360 and walking away

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'm thinking how much worse things have got here in my country over the last 20 years, to the point I don;t even recognize it. None of the people on the streets I see were born here or their parents, none of them share my families history here, or religion, or accent. I am discriminated against by employment policies which reserve quotas for none nations and people from ethic groups that are not mine. I consider my anger and rage and raise my left hand amd move it slowly to the left causing his vision to track the motion and without removing it from my coat pockert shoot this man in the face with the 44 mag snub nose in my right hand. I then fire again twice into his sternum and withdraw the pistol and stamp repeatedly on his smashed face until it is not recognizable any more . Take his gun and his wallet and balaclava and walk quickly away. When I have walked three KM and walked through enough grass and dirt to cover the blood on my feet I head to wards the nearest public transport and pay cash for the furthest destination.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Why haven't you left LA/NYC yet?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Maybe I did.Maybe I got a bus.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      not reading all that shit
      nice demoralization post Black person

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    "Heh, looks like this fool chose the wrong guy to mug"
    *sprints and closes the distance between me and him before he can react*
    *controls the muzzle of his gun*
    *uses 2 fingers to twist his gun 180 degrees, breaking his wrist in the process*
    "Well well we'll, looks like the would be mugger is now the muggee heh. Now I could threaten you with your own weapon, but doing so would tarnish my honor and honestly is beneath a gentleman like me"
    *quickly disassembles the gun quicker than a united states marine could*
    "now, I can either kick your ass and make you wait for the police, or you can sit there peacefully and wait, your choice"
    *ends up on the front page of youtube because the entire encounter was captured on a Ring(TM) doorbell camera*
    *has to make an update video explaining my thoughts and feelings during the encounter, plus the subsequent stardom, plus all the ladies*

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Nice dude. Could i get your sloppy seconds, or at least watch?

  8. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Look over his shoulder and say "Oh, Hello Officer!" Then as he looks away in panic, shoot him in the groin with my handloaded 12 gauge "Semen Demon" and "Fermented Herring" . loads, while cackling gleefully.

  9. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Get my wallet out
    Just kidding it's a gun lol

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That would actually work with this maybe? IS THAT WHAT ITS INTENDED FOR? OMG MIND FREAK!

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        No dumbass, I'll just use a real gun, not a fricking Transformer that I have to put together before I can shoot two rounds of .22LR

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Your old boomer hands would probably turn into dust trying to open a fricking paper weight 22lr wallet sized gun, my bad I forgot.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I carry a full size Jericho, monkey

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              What's a Jericho?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                a type of wall

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                have a nice day

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        That’s a tool for a hit man.

        Concealed in the hand and used to pop two pills into the back of some goombah’s head on the QT.

        You then fold it back up, slide it into your pocket and scram while the bunny does the “bunny run” with his legs while doing the “T-Rex” with his arms and hands.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous
          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            That would work, but too loud if you want to pop him on the street.

            Better to use a .22 Short with the muzzle pressed right at the back of his skull angled up.

            You can use any number of rods if you don’t care about the noise and drawing attention to your work.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >Better to use a .22 Short with the muzzle pressed right at the back of his skull angled up.

              >t. picrel

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                That’s usually a good sign especially if it’s accompanied by the same bloody brain snot flowing out of the ears and from under the eyelids.

                Means you’ve generated enough hydraulic shock inside the cranium to rupture the weak points and his CS fluid is leaking out.

                That’s not gonna get better on it’s own.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            gon

  10. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Say:

    “Okay, dude, cool out. Let me get my wallet out!”

    …while putting my left hand, palm out, in front of his face to obscure his view of me. Be reaching around like I’m going for my wallet.

    Draw my piece, slap at his gun hand while dropping into a sitting position and bringing my piece out and up.

    When it’s at his dick level, I start shooting and keep pulling trigger riding the recoil up until Im at his head.
    I “Homeboy Hold” because ai carry DA/SA semiautos and this have the longer stiffer trigger pull on the first shot, and if Im going to “pull” a shot while yanking that trigger, Im pulling upwards from his dick and toward his liver, heart, aorta, throat and head, (and the spine behind it).

    Second option, (lower percentage than the first), is start the same with the hand jive, but when my ironclears leather , I slap his hand away, put my head down and charge him, sticking my muzzle into his belly angled upwards and start yanking the trigger.

    It’s a crap-shoot either way. if I’m in range of some character in this getup, my SA has let me down already, and it’s all in Lord Jesus’ hands who is gonna die.

    If it’s him, the last thing he sees on this earth will be my dIck, passing into his fricking face and nostrils and gasping mouth.

    Goodbye, homosexual! Come and get him, Satan! A fresh soul for you to roast in Hell forever!

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >sticking my muzzle into his belly angled upwards

      >Out of battery
      >Click Click Click

      >Revolver smiles

  11. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    I'm a genius boy with a loving adoptive family? I'll take it. Steve is going to be a success.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Would you really have taken Laura over Myra? I know Myra was crazy, but damn, girl..

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Hell no, but Steve is pure, and I'm not that good.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Woman had a real pair of cannons. RIP

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Lord A’mighty! Look what I done found out in the melon patch!

          Serious bedwench material.

  12. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    I find that interesting because you could not be more wrong but also to have such imagery in your head I can only assume you are a homosexual and a racial minority, certainly brown.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It’s not entirely Gay to want to sodomize Urkel.

      It’s about 99% Gay, but not entirely.
      He may just be the 1% who just like to buck-break nerdy Black folks because he’s racist.

      Just sayin’

  13. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    That's why I carry a dummy wallet with goatse printed on a business card. But the smart thing to do is put prop cards in it with airtag sewed in and help cops find him.

  14. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Everyone in this thread must post their gun or GTFO
    The dubs have spoken

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Dammit

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      re rolling for anon

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I bear .45 caliber Witness to My Lord and My God.

      Hear me O Lord, in my time of need!

      Behold His Justice and despair, O wicked ones, for this day hath His righteous judgment been passed upon yo’ ass!

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You specifically are why I said post guns
        You're cringy as hell and you're either using ChatGPT or you're literally mentally moronic

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          You ever been in a shooting incident and survived it, anon?
          If you have, you realize that your life was in God’s hands. A guy can only prepare so much and for only so many possibilities.

          When you come down to brass tacks, the Lord lets you live or He doesn’t.
          I lived.

          I can’t speak for everyone, but for me they were a spiritual awakening.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Hitler had a lot of bad ideas
            Aktion T4 wasn't one of them

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              He got in late on the eugenics train.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              You sure about that, anon?

              Your homosexual autistic ass would have been wearing a diaper and giving a blow-job to a diesel engine, y’know?
              Swatting at things with your little handbag because of your “feelz”.
              Yeah, delicate little “sensitive” types like yourself were not their cup of tea at all.

              Poor Kraut Downsies being exterminated for being born with an extra chromosome…like they could help that.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                That is so hateful Anon. I mean really, I am insulted and concerned for you.

                What is this unabashed loathing you have, that would cause you to project a picture of a poor, helpless Diesel-cycle engine being abused in such a manner?
                Have you no concern for the plight of the helpless engine?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Stop using ChatGPT

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I assure you, that is hand typed.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Lol u used a - for blowjob. What a dork

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It’s spelled different in KrautLand, you ignorant frick.

                And blow-jobs were banned because Hitler wanted all Aryan sperm swimming inside Aryan Fallopian Tubes to produce good little future Aryan soldiers.

                (And instead we got Anna-Frijd from ABBA…oh well!)

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I got stabbed in the buttcheeks one time by a skinny Black person behind a bar. True story guys. My buddy knocked him out and the guys mom dragged him to their car. I was really drunk and making fun of him for selling crack

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I’m truly at a loss to how to respond to your fascinating tale, anon.

              Is there a deeper meaning that I’m missing here?
              His momma was supervising him selling the crack in an alley behind a bar?
              That’s some Grade “A” parenting, right there.

              Did your buddy pay her to suck his dick before he allowed her to collect her pickaninny?

              “Yeah…frick him, he can wait. You wanna make a quick Lincoln or what?”

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Sure, pick one.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Lick my taint

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Who do you main in siege?

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I don't play R6 Siege at all

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            A likely story, I'm keeping an eye on you.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        what furniture is on that?

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          https://www.kpykusa.com/

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Rollin

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Pull out wallet
      >"Take it, I don't want any trouble"
      >I throw it at him
      >Accidentally throw it past him because I have a terrible throwing arm
      >He turns around and bends down to pick it up
      >Pull out pic rel
      >Pull back hammer and take aim
      >Pause because shooting a man in the back is unsporting, even if he is a scoundrel
      >"Hey, [insert appropriate racial slur for his ethnicity]"
      >He turns around
      >I shoot
      >Massive cloud of white Pyrodex smoke fills the space between us
      >Nearby car alarms going off, muffled by the ringing in my ears
      >"Shit, I forgot my ramrod."
      >30 seconds later, the smoke finally clears
      >Mugger is dead from .50 caliber wound
      >Grab my wallet, his wallet, and his gun
      >Make a run for it
      >No one can prove I shot him because my gun doesn't even have a spent case to leave behind and the bullet blew completely through him
      Just as the founding fathers intended.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      since when is it a requirement to own guns in order to post on the u/k/raine war board???

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I think it's safe to assume you don't own any

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          guns are for chuds???? i don't need a gun to make my loose wiener feel bigger

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You don't have a functioning penis either

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I’ll lift my shirt to show off my tummy so the robber is distracted then I’ll have time to draw this little guy

  15. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    So, you're calling me a wealthy black actor?
    Um, okay.
    Very odd insult.

  16. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    you see, in the blink of an eye i grab the gun and in 8 nanoseconds jam my pinky behind the trigger preventing you from firing a shot. what now?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I jam my thumbs in your eyes.

  17. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Alright man, I don't want any trouble.
    >Reach in pocket
    >Give him my hello kitty wallet
    >Robber looks down at it
    >Looks back up at me
    >Throws it at my feet
    >Give me your real fricking wallet right now!
    >Uh uhh
    >I reach into pocket
    >Pull out handful of spaghetti
    >It was my spaghetti pocket
    >He stares blankly at me
    >He facepalms and sighs
    >He opens his mouth like hes about to say something
    >Not a word just nods his head in disappointment
    >He puts his gun back in his pocket
    >Turns around and starts to walk away
    >I pull out my blued S&W Model 29 chambered in .44 Magnum with 8-3/8" barrel and put 6 rounds of Hornady XTP HPs perfectly in between his shoulder blades
    >Pick up my hello kitty wallet
    >turn 360 degree and get outta there
    >Tfw the 6 rounds of Hornady .44 HPs cost more than the cash I had on me
    >Tfw the hello kitty wallet was my real wallet

  18. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Politely comply until he makes a mistake and gives me an opening to draw from concealment and magdump.

    Only real choice you have in this situation unless you want to take your chances with a decoy wallet satisfying the mugger enough for him to frick off.

    Alternatively, shoot him with the unholstered pistol from within my hoodie pocket as I pretend to fumble around in there to get my wallet. They can't react to a draw if you shoot without drawing. Big brain move that necessitates pocket carrying a loaded and chambered gun with an unprotected trigger like an absolute gremlin. But it's a bad part of town, so you have to take risks to keep ahead of the street thugs.

    OR, just rush the fricker and tank the bullets. If you're not hit in the brain or heart, you have several minutes to kill him in a blind rage and maybe find a hospital afterward. Drugs recommended for this route. Again, bad part of town, necessary risks, etc.

  19. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Pretend to suck your dick
    Then kneecap you with a 32 and force you to suck mine

  20. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Shoot myself before he can shoot me

  21. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  22. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Give him the decoy wallet with a RFID fob.

  23. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >pull out heavy steel shitbrick of a gun
    >adrenaline pumping, cannot form words
    >cannot muster the brain cells to pull the trigger
    >beat you to death with it while screeching and hooting like a caveman
    >only notice I've been shot multiple times after coming down
    >die probably
    Someone better be filming my finest hour when it comes.

  24. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >*zip*
    >*psshhhhhhhhhhh*

  25. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >gimme yo shet
    >I return to monkey and throw my shit at him

  26. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    1. Give 'im mah shit
    2. Try not to cry.
    3. Cry a lot.

  27. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Give him a powerful stare while I shit myself in front of him.

  28. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Throw my car keys at his feet yelling, "take it, just don't hurt me!"
    Shoot him in the head when he stoops to pick them up.

  29. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Hand him my throwdown wallet that is fat Obama $3 bills, my fake Rolex that contains an Airtag, and my fake iPhone that is basically one big lithium battery that is rigged to start lithium fire when you plug it into a charger.

  30. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    *Ugh, call an ambulance, but not for me*

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I came here to post that.

  31. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >hand him my wallet
    >act defeated
    >he takes off
    >shoot him in the back
    >take both our wallets

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      But then he might shoot you after you give him your wallet and he still has the gun pointed at you

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        If he was going to do that why not just shoot me first and then take my wallet from my pocket?

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          If the gun is still in the robber's hand, then the threat is persistent. You can shoot anytime to stop that deadly force threat.

  32. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    toss a masson jar of silver fuminate

  33. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I put on my robe and wizard hat

  34. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  35. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I pull out my ar15 i've been concealed carrying the entire time and room clear the mugger

  36. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  37. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >give them my wallet
    >it's actually a decoy wallet
    >the second they open it, the striker from a confetti popper goes off, setting off all the gunpowder I've stuffed into it
    >take the wallet as punishment for falling for the oldest trick in the book

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