Zelensky has traveled to Japan and obtained the Kusanagi no Tsurugi, "the sword that cuts destiny".

Zelensky has traveled to Japan and obtained the Kusanagi no Tsurugi, "the sword that cuts destiny". With the Orb of Pisskey, he now holds two of the three artefacts of the progenitor race of mankind. What is the final artefact?

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  1. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Tap Water of 50 Cent to finally sway the pro-Russian Thirdies

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Does he speak English?

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        some people speak The Queen's English. he speaks Queens English.

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        This guy’s tongue is Shakespeare compared to current Ebonic vernacular spoken by modern youths.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      The sword will be merged with the orb to create the ultimate weapon, it will then be placed within a holy bath and submerged with 50 cent tap water and left to marinate for 24 hours, the final product will be a glorious weapon of unknown properties.

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        +1 to contraction of venereal disease, chance to spread on hit.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      >water to grow the wheat
      >sun to mature it
      >blade to harvest it
      >he who holds all three shall reap the world
      I sure hope those watermelons are worth it.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      The sword will be merged with the orb to create the ultimate weapon, it will then be placed within a holy bath and submerged with 50 cent tap water and left to marinate for 24 hours, the final product will be a glorious weapon of unknown properties.

      It will be VitaminWater™.

  2. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    He went to Japan to buy this.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Why would he need gastrointestinal pills?

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Hoppe's No.. 9? can't he get that from Europe?

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Bruh that's Chinese xd

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        No it's not. Seirogan is "defeat Russia pill." It's mostly wood creosote and good for constipation. It smells like death. (I have used it. It works but good God does it stink.)

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      More appropriate than you think. 正露丸's original name was 征露丸.
      Literally translates to "Pills for War-against-Russia".

      It was originally formulated during Russo-Japanese war, when Japanese soldiers at the frontline were suffering from serious health issues from poorly preserved rations and underprepared local foods.

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        It's pretty hardcore that they still sell those. Should be provided to Ukraine.

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        These are sold all over Asia, under the currently more political correct name of course.

        It's not exactly good for you though. It stops diarrhea and gut ache almost immediately, but it does so by kills everything alive in your gut. You'll have to rebuilt your probiotic gut flora from scratch since the pill basically rendered it barren. Taking it for prolong period of time will also inevitably damage your gut lining.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Lmao you need a Chinese speaker to decode this meme for you.

  3. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Golden balls of Genghis khan a.k.a "eggs of faith" It is believed that whoever is in possession of these balls obtains the national resources and riches of his lands and they multiply and never end. Golden balls of genghis khan is the reason empire known as Golden Hoard existed in modern Russias territory.
    Unfortunately Putin himself or some oligarch in his circle is holding on to this balls.
    I expect Ukrainian military expedition to try and capture this artifact.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      The balls are actually currently transplanted into xi jinpings testicles

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Didn't work out for spain many hundreds of years ago

  4. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    The third one is the first he actual acquired. The Treasury of America.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      try again

  5. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    A piece of the True Cross.

    Turns out, Ukraine already holds that ... in the burned out hull of the Moskva on the bottom of the Black Sea.

    > t. A piece of the True Cross cannot be destroyed. I wouldn't worry about it ... having been incinerated.

  6. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >What is the final artefact?
    The Fisherman's Ring, still on the Papal digit, severed and rammed down a blunderbuss whose barrel was cast from bronze from the First Tabernacle and stocked with wood from the True Cross.

  7. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    If I was a vatnik and saw Zelensky get such a warm welcome from the land of my waifu's I dont know how bad I'd feel.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      I'd shoot up some krokodil to calm my nerves

  8. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Kusanagi no Tsurugi
    Lost at sea, the current one is a replica

  9. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Japanese insider here, Zeleńsky was actually poisoned by fugu fish dinner by a samurai posing as a chef at 3:AM.

    Every zelensky you see after tonight is not the real zelensky

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Ukraine insider here, we know he's not "real". We're on our sixth Zelensky.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      >tfw all slavic leaders are just clones

  10. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Nice cope but none of this shit matters if he can't take them inside the Soledar salt mine crypt

  11. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Japan's biggest artefact is a fricking mass produced Chinese bronze sword of the warring state era
    >something every chinese peasant digs up every year when he tilts his field.

    poor fricking civilization.

  12. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    YOU DENY YOUR WEAPON ITS PURPOSE

  13. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    An antidote for botulism. It will undo all of Putin's botox and he will instantly age 700 years and turn into a pile of dust.

  14. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >The Orb of Pisskey
    >The CZ 75 of Order of the White Lion
    > Kusanagi no Tsurugi, "the sword that cuts destiny"

    Zelesky is on a quest to collect legendary artifacts. Soon he will have a complete set and be unstoppable on the battlefield

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