Your plane is shot down flying over darkest Africa. You are the only survivor.

Your plane is shot down flying over darkest Africa. You are the only survivor. Rescued from the wreckage by a local tribe you are brought before their chief. He admires your physical physique (you are working out, right anon?) and tells you that you have two choices. You can be ritually sacrificed to the gods by means of an incredibly painful process. Or you can marry his daughter (pic related) and become a general and use your Western military training (you did serve, right?) to command his men in their fight to wipe out the Watoombas (we spit on their name, ptooh).
What do you do?

  1. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Be the general long enough to try to get some white bitches in there. I don't understand this jungle fever shit.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I used to think the same until I got a blowjob from a black girl

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        how does it differ from a regular blowjob

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          1,500% increased chance of AIDS. Some people like the risk/thrill

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          When you come to, your wallet and keys are gone.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          How would he know?

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          they break out the grapefruit

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Sorry about the AIDS

  2. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Find where out where the chinks are and go raid me some qt chinkfus

  3. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >and tells you
    He speaks English?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The last missionary they ate was very well educated.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        1,500% increased chance of AIDS. Some people like the risk/thrill

        When you come to, your wallet and keys are gone.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        what is this magical power of absorbing the knowledge of your food? and how do i learn and master it?

  4. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Request military and industrial help from the chinks at the cost of half of the national resources for 500 years

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This but also tell the chinks I'm going to need $50m for myself to sweeten the deal.

  5. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    My jungle fever finally pays off. I'm gonna gift the chief so many grandsons he could make an army out of them

  6. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I fuck moron bitches for free and never got any sort of army or ability to freely kill Africans. How is this even a question?

  7. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Take stock of weapon caches, ammunition, transportation, and food
    >begin training troops on how to fight and perform first aid
    >run scouting missions for reconnaissance
    >after a while I have my wife poison the chieftain and declare myself chief
    >kill the other tribe in Decisive Tang victory.
    >find chinks and sell land and people for safe passage and millions
    >die from Superaids and Malaria in a western hospital

  8. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    post more tribal qts

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      go to /s/ you coomer

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous
      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous
        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous
          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous
          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            https://i.imgur.com/ksqcaaP.jpg

            What's the story behind the pic? Who whipped her?

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I did.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              some tribal tradition where you get hit with sticks

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Probably slavers, Africans are still very busy enslaving each other

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I whipped her with my long, thin penis

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Males and females undergo ritual whipping in multiple African cultures. Scarring and circumcision are also widely practiced for various religious and.magical reasons. Plus traditional societies apply physical discipline in case of some transgression or fuckup.
              https://africa.cgtn.com/2017/05/11/brutal-tribal-ceremony-in-ethiopia-sees-females-lashed-to-demonstrate-dedication-to-their-men/

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >No access to antibiotics at all
                >Let's give ourselves a bunch of open wounds for shits and gigs
                Why fore

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >survive this wacky test to prove your immune system is stronger than the rest so you deserve to have children
                ez

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >>No access to antibiotics at all

                You should unironically trust the (black) science.

                https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7699609/table/antibiotics-09-00830-t001/?report=objectonly

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Holy shit, that stuff actually works?

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Males and females undergo ritual whipping in multiple African cultures. Scarring and circumcision are also widely practiced for various religious and.magical reasons. Plus traditional societies apply physical discipline in case of some transgression or fuckup.
                After thousands of years i think they know how to discipline their fellow Black folks better than Whites can discipline their dogs.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It’s not a fetish it’s tradition we swear.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              She back talked and got the moron Whipper 5000

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It's 9,000, dummy.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                WHAT 9000??

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          https://i.imgur.com/uaGJ38h.jpg

          The scars are fucking metal and her skin is otherwise super nice

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        W-what's that third disk for?

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          for your pee hole

  9. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Show them the power of the Maxim gun. By using it on the Watoombas of course, I am desperately lonely and need a wife.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      What ever happens, you have got
      A Maxim gun, and they have not

  10. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Can I just use her as a political marriage and take a consort we kidnap off a yacht or something?

  11. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >command their warriors
    >finally get to start my conquest of the African continent
    Deal

  12. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >What do you do?
    Die from injuries sustained in the crash, or die for lack of medications I need that they can't get, or be murdered by a rival faction, or something like that.

  13. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I slaughter the entire village for being morons.

  14. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I go fuck up some Watoombas.

  15. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >accept and creampie his daughter repeatedly (her ass looks great in doggy style)
    >make contact with westerners with the premise of buying arms from them
    >travel to another part of africa to secure the deal
    >establish contact with home and get picked up the by un or something, brought back to Europe where I can make it back to the usa
    >leave my little niglet babies in africa
    >never go anywhere near that continent ever again

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You're already a war criminal in the UN's eyes mate. Even if you didn't actually do anything you're such a novelty the old Bush Telegraph has carried stories of your atrocities and the western press has leaped all over it because a white man commanding black tribes to commit atrocities is a perfect story.
      The only place you're going when you leave Africa is to the Hague.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >turning yourself in to the UN of all people
      finna get sent to the Hague m80

  16. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >tell my new wife I can take her to a magical place with running water and central heating
    >go home

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      what are you r kelly?

  17. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >become white genghis khan
    >wipe out the watoombas
    >create an entirely new blue eyed african ethnic group through sexo

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >fucking so many africans that their genes get watered down and africans now only consist of 1% african DNA and 99% anon
      >turning africa into a white continent
      based

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Its a tough job, but somebody’s got to do it. Maybe I’ll pull a John Wayne and do pic related for keks, showing up to UN assemblies to talk about how I am totally improving the region and not building a giant tribal army state.
        >also gib malaria meds pls

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Just be careful you don’t get galdaffi’ed when your war crimes against the watoombahs surface.
          You’d be better becoming a resource baron and conglomerating the neighboring tribes.
          Then once you’ve accrued enough land and population, start your own currency and a syncretic religion based upon your allies’ faith. Grow larger with vassal state neighbors and play games between China and the U.S. government for weapons and further resources.
          Such is Roma Africanus.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >be careful you don’t get galdaffi’ed when your war crimes against the watoombahs surface.
            Lol, as long as you don't threaten the petrodollar or directly undermine any local governments (or at least only the ones none of the big boys like or care about) you're golden my dude. Nobody cares about one tribe.
            Rest of the plan is solid, as long as you don't get a big head and a big mouth it can all be done. If you do become cocky and loudmouthed about all the shit you've done and are doing, then you get droned probably.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              petrodollar is on the way out anyway. not to say dollar itself is on the way out or anything, but petro is just becoming less and less desirable to back your currency against.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >petrodollar is on the way out anyway. not to say dollar itself is on the way out
                No, they're pretty closely tied so that's more or less the same thing. Unless they find a way to dump all that overseas oil USD into something else, it comes right back home and suddenly it takes a truck full of bills to buy a day's worth of food.
                Fiat currency: not even once.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        So i would just turn Africa into Italy then?

  18. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Leave them and join the Watoombas because they are probably less of an asshole

  19. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    Similar happened to my friends grandfather in Burma, told to man an adhoc door gun on a C-47 and ambushed by zeros, only survivor of crew and rescued by tribal people, spent 4 months ambushing Japanese with them before finding proper allied forces

  20. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Lol most soldiers arent capable of commanding their fucking stripper whore wives or their damned personal lives lmao. What a fucking idiot. Take it easy on your knees dude.

  21. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I mean i don't really wanna but i guess ill choose the wife and kill other ooga boogas as oppose to being tortured to death and maybe i will find a way to escape without getting aids

  22. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >. Or you can marry his daughter (pic related) and become a general and use your Western military training (you did serve, right?) to command his men in their fight to wipe out the Watoombas (we spit on their name, ptooh).
    I will lead them on a exodus to Israel as a new home

  23. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Ask them to bring me to the embassy.

  24. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'd take the job I've read this book so I should be able to conquer half the continent I a few years

  25. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    would

  26. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Ask him if he has any son's I can buck break instead.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Ask him if he has any son's I can buck break instead.
      This

  27. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    *Grabs her ass*

    Those Watoombas morons are as good as dead, moron

  28. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would shave my hair down, dye it pink, and be the Grand Italian wop bastard that unites all the tribes that I was destined to be!

  29. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >become general
    >coup d'etat
    >¿¿¿¿
    >start plantation

  30. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I read that novella as a kid. “Home” by Robert Muchamore. Was good shit.

  31. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Mating press her out of politeness and then explain that my western military master-plan will require them giving me the keys to the village Toyota and directions to the nearest town.

  32. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I stay and bid my time. Using my far advanced modern military knowledge I shall conquer the surrounding tribes under this new banner. And when the chieftain eventually passes, I shall take over and mold this untainted people to my image. I will create the only functioning modern nation on the continent. It will be the crown garden gnomeel of the new African union, with outdated superstitions purged and uncorrupted by western wokism. Along with the untapped natural resources in abundance, it will be the proverbial shining city on the hill, where people of all color will want to immigrate to. After two generations, we're now a nation of oddly attractive model-esq caramel people.

    A statue of me will be erect at the grant hall of the assembly building, with my right arm raised toward the sky, but my face obstructed from view. No one needs to remember what I look like or even what race I was. Just know that we're now the fairest of all people, and that I alone was the father of this grant project.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Sounds unironically like Rwanda

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Thirty years later:
      >GREAT LEADER IS DEAD. SOLO NOBRE MUST BE LIBERATED BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY TONIGHT.
      >EXXON-MOBILE HAS PREPARED YOUR CONTRACT.
      >WELCOME, BRIGADOR.

  33. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Western military training
    If this is Africa wouldn't it be considered northern military training?

  34. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    All cats are grey in the dark.

  35. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Ask to use the restroom, smear my shit all over myself, and walk away disguised amongst them.

  36. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    There is no more painful process than living with morons so I'm gonna have to go with execution.

  37. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >He admires your physical physique
    Doubt
    >use your Western military training
    I was in the US navy so we're gonna clean all fucking day interspersed with death by PowerPoint. Oh and make sure we recall the entire command on a Saturday when some kid gets a DUI the night before.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      ...
      Get into the pot.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Be careful Mobutu, he said he was in the Navy. Might have AIDS.

  38. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Beautiful work when you can get it. And just imagine how generation after generation of young boys and old men sitting at fireside will talk about the big "Nasara" in his short shorts eating fire and standing firm to the devil himself. Blood red as the ground his feet silently tread upon. Strong as the odor of death and destruction he left behind. Spirt as loud as his bellowing voice. Quiet as the evil resting in his soul. Timeless.

    You all should try it while you can. There is nothing left at home. One way ticket. Be him.

  39. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    balls
    deep
    cream
    pie

    And then go shoot some tribal fuzzy wuzzies or whatever, seems like a good time while you wait for rescue.

  40. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    are you sure Im not actually dead and in paradise with all the ebony honeys? Because this scenario for sufe seems like it.

  41. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Sacrifice me daddy

  42. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >given the opportunity to wage war
    shit yeah lets GOOOOOOOOO

  43. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    nyet

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