you open your fridge & see this, wyd?

you open your fridge & see this, wyd?

250 Piece Survival Gear First Aid Kit

LifeStraw Water Filter for Hiking and Preparedness

250 Piece Survival Gear First Aid Kit

  1. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    boom splartch bleeaurg pffffssss

  2. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Eat it

  3. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I move it to the bottom shelve where the gayots are.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Calm down Jeff

  4. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Figure out a new way to stop those damn fridge gnomes since the claymore obviously didn't work

  5. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why would a claymore be in the fridge? It explicitly says not to eat it.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      They say every warning label has a story behind it...

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        When cordite was introduced they had a problem with soldiers pulling the strands out and eating them. The propellant had a sweet taste and nitroglycerine is a stimulant in small doses, so the enlisted men were treating it like candy. I wouldn't be surprised if there was a similar story involving plastic explosives.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I can believe it, but do you have a source for that? The forbidden vermicelli, it calls to me.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            https://pdfs.semanticscholar.org/abaf/009c8713aadd8accbb03b2b40a93b5c3c77a.pdf

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Amazing

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Amazing

              https://i.imgur.com/lkExjzt.jpeg

              Ingesting cordite also made you juuuuuuuust sick enough to get out of duty without causing real damage. It was perfect for malingerers.

              As prior enlisted, this would 100% happen still to this day.
              I miss trashcan jousting

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I don't think enlisted men have changed since the days of the Roman legions.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I guarantee even in the ungabunga times we were still sack tapping eachother on hunting patrols
                I'm pretty sure fricking with stuff/eachother is just hardcoded in our dna.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Even gorillas show behaviors of laughter to diffuse tense situations.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                people don't change.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >oi mate let me just pack my pipe with some cordite, that stuff hits hard

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I recall it was soldiers breaking open the mines to get C-4 which they would break, really more of a rip, to use as a heater for food.
          This could also just be fuddlord

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Ingesting cordite also made you juuuuuuuust sick enough to get out of duty without causing real damage. It was perfect for malingerers.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            And even after the effects wore off and you were back to feeling more or less normal, you still *looked* sick for a few days. The assassin in Day of the Jackal uses cordite to appear like a much older wounded veteran.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >The propellant had a sweet taste
          The city I went to college in had their hazmat team respond to the college science labs one evening when some dumbass managed to spill something that was apparently pretty nasty. They ended up doing a controlled demo of it. I was at least 100 yards away from the building, but afterwords the air smelled absolutely delightful for a while. Always wondered about that.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        so thats why my soda bottle says "do not stick in ass"

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Yes, that unfortunate incident in the Balkans that led to a slight genocide.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Vending machines with the tipping warning? Yeah. morona be tipping them over trying to get the goodies. Some died. Some injuried.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        When cordite was introduced they had a problem with soldiers pulling the strands out and eating them. The propellant had a sweet taste and nitroglycerine is a stimulant in small doses, so the enlisted men were treating it like candy. I wouldn't be surprised if there was a similar story involving plastic explosives.

        I recall it was soldiers breaking open the mines to get C-4 which they would break, really more of a rip, to use as a heater for food.
        This could also just be fuddlord

        iirc there used to be rumors in the military that you could get high from eating C-4. From what I've heard it's not true but idk.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      When cordite was introduced they had a problem with soldiers pulling the strands out and eating them. The propellant had a sweet taste and nitroglycerine is a stimulant in small doses, so the enlisted men were treating it like candy. I wouldn't be surprised if there was a similar story involving plastic explosives.

      During the Vietnam War, the VC melted down explosive from dud bombs and put the filler in coke cans to make grenades. They also burned pieces of c4 as fuel for campfire and cooking. Supposedly it causes diarrhea if you ate it, emergency laxative?

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Explosive diarrhea?

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Carlos!

  6. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Die.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >admitting you're a homosexual

  7. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >leave demilled weapo under your pillow
    >/k/ fairy leaves an explosive in your fridge

  8. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    grab the milk carton and close my fridge.

  9. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >american soldiers need "Front toward enemy" to know how to place the mine
    LOL

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Dummy proofing equipment is bad

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >natural selection is bad

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The problem with high explosives is that it's not just the dummy who gets selected, it's also everyone around the dummy.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          yeah actually. I'd like to keep the dumb soldiers too. it means more soldiers.
          if you want to whittle your army down to only the smartest 10% by all means do that but I don't think you'll find it a good strategy

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          the best doctors in the world still wright
          >THIS LEG
          >NOT THIS LEG
          when they go to do amputations. making equipment easier to use is smart because it reduces attention required to do it right, which leaves more attention for other things.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I thought they had the patient write that on their leg? I read a story once about someone getting surgery who wrote "THIS LEG" and a bunch of silly nonsense and doodles and stuff on the other leg while waiting for the doc/nurse whoever

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              They do that now because quite a lot of doctors aren't actually that smart and would sometimes incorrectly mark and then chop off healthy limbs (meaning the patient loses both).

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I've been a mechanic my whole adult life, and there is considerable room for confusion between what the customer tells the service advisor, and what the service advisor writes up regarding "left" or "right" side of the vehicle (which matters depending on whether you're looking at it from the front or from behind). We're supposed to only use "driver" and "passenger" but dumb stuff still filters through all the time. I could imagine a similar thing, doctor's perspective of the "left" leg standing before the patient vs the leg owner's perspective of the "left" leg

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I just had eye surgery and they stuck a piece of tape over the correct eye

  10. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >you open your fridge & see this, wyd?
    I'm a heterosexual chad so I'd scoot it to the side in order to grab the leftover chinese food behind it.

  11. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    cut the tripwire and start eating

  12. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Relax, because I'm not OP and it can't hurt me.

  13. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    1.Duck and jump aside, crawl towards safe and retrieve firearm
    2.Call out for wife
    3.Magdump rifle into wife
    4.Call the police

  14. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Turn 360 degrees and walk away.

  15. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  16. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Close the fridge and it can't hurt me.

  17. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Think "oh thank god it's finally over".

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >*CLICK* (confetti shoots out like those little party poppers)
      Sorry anon, your suffering continues

  18. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Lokk overto see if the Sunny-D is behind it.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Ok, we got some soda. OJ. Purple stuff. A directional mine. Oh, Sunny Delight!

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I take my lunch out and close the door, then I rearm the mine. That'll teach my coworkers to steal my meal

        Kek!

  19. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Instantly realize those weren't empty threats my roommate gave me if I continued to drink from his milk carton,

  20. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >you open your fridge & see this, wyd?
    say good morning hope you had a good time last night and offer it a coffee

  21. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Dummy mine in the fridge?

    B A C K W A S H
    A
    C
    K
    W
    A
    S
    H

  22. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'd tell OP to get down!

  23. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I have been deemed the enemy, and resign myself to death by 1000 pellets.

  24. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Enjoyed the carnage

    %3D

  25. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >wyd
    grab another cold one and close the door

  26. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I take my lunch out and close the door, then I rearm the mine. That'll teach my coworkers to steal my meal

  27. 2 weeks ago
    12-B

    It's not even fused, call a platoon meeting and instruct joe on how to properly emplace an M18.

  28. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Well that depends
    >Scenario 1: it detonates
    I think about how much I love brown women and grilled cheese as 800 steel balls shred both me and anything else behind me. I hope none of my family members/pets get hurt or killed.
    >Scenario 2: it does not explode
    I now have a Claymore, I’am now content and happy with my very own directional mine.

  29. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Stare for a couple minutes, sigh heavily, and say, "Am I really hungry, or am I just bored?" out loud.

  30. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    If you actually get to see it, it wasn't wired properly.

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