You are given a turf and 50 million yen in cash by your boss in Osaka, who tells you to start a yakuza family in Tokyo. How do you equip and train your men so that some random person can't just waltz in and shoot you to death?
You are given a turf and 50 million yen in cash by your boss in Osaka, who tells you to start a yakuza family in Tokyo. How do you equip and train your men so that some random person can't just waltz in and shoot you to death?
Just take the money, and have Beat Takeshi help me start a Yakuza version of Takeshi's Castle.
Based painful eliminations of the day enjoyer.
I see you're people of culture as well
>Trying to get into your HQ is so much fun hitmen who pass it will intentionally miss with all their shots so they have to do it over again after they get more ammo
>Then whoops haha wrong ammo for this gun I guess I gotta do it again!
live by the sword
Isn’t that like twelve dollars
it's like $340k
divide yen by 100 and you have a guestimate
Why bother? Kiryu will just beat me up and then piss off back to his orphanage no matter what I try.
What's the Yakuza scene like in Osaka?
I'm pretty sure it's yakuza central. My gramps ended up owing them money for banging a hooker there.
So I've not dealt with yaks directly, but my wife has had to (her mother was a gokutsuma, a Japanese gun moll, for a time). Believe me or don't I don't care, but this is all stuff I've heard from her and her mother.
Yakuza are fucked. After the wars of the 1980s and the Kyushu boys wilin' out too much, the police have far greater powers to investigate, and financial institutions who deal with them can get fucked in the ass for even letting a known Yakuza member get a bank account. Extortion (mikajime and soukaiya) is dying out and they focus more on fraud, scams, and trafficking now. They're increasingly old and desperate and from what I understand the younger ones are increasingly either just thieves or fraud/cyber criminals. Yakuza in the entertainment industry is also pretty much dead now. A lot of the porno industry is increasingly legit, owned by large corporations.
>and 50 million yen in cash by your boss
Chump change for Osaka but doable. Their buildings are quite small but they are often quite security hardened. Armored doors, many camera systems. A typical attack is lobbing a grenade through an open window or a driveby.
Yakuza activity is down everywhere. Regardless, Osaka was always a hotspot. Yamaguchigumi fragmenting means that are likely opportunities there. Dwindling ones but nonetheless.
>buying off state assets with that little money while you can't even get a legit bank account due to the laws
Yeah nah
Yeah you can. It's not the 80s anymore. Still, not enough for any kind of grand headquarters.
Anyway. This is a weapons board. You'll get guns through corrupt contacts in Vladivostok, straw purchases in the USA, and backyard Filipino gunsmiths. The "Dosu" (tanto) is the signature Yakuza weapon, but sword control law makes them hard to come by nowadays if you're not a legit collector, so I imagine a lot will be using knockoffs. Maybe some yaks are making "Yamagami specials" now. Who knows?
idk I guess a bunch of baseball bats and swords
I respectfully tell my boss that I appreciate the faith and esteem he has in me and I appreciate the opportunity he's giving me, but I don't know the first thing about running an organized crime ring and I think someone else should be in charge.
But if it's "just do it or I'll cut your pinky finger off." I'm going to show nippon the wonders of leather jackets, switchblades and greased hair. They've already got rock n' roll so that's one less item to crowbar in.
tape a bunch of glocks under the table so Omar Epps and I can shoot the mexicans
Buy off a JSDF facility in the middle of nowher Gifu prefecture. Run a legitimate business in Tokyo and do all my hoodrat shit out in the countryside.
3D print a bunch of FGC-9s and arm my men with them. Also give them cut resistant shirts. That will automatically give my men a huge advantage over other Yakuza families. Most of them don't use guns, or if they do they are used very sparingly.
Better yet; destabilize yakuza rule by printing up as many of these as you can and start introducing them to zed tier criminals in the districts controlled by rival gangs. Bonus points if you can start funneling in fent, too.
Standing out like that sounds like a great way to make everyone, including the authorities, gang up to hammer you down.
Yakuza rule is already destabilized, and fading fast. Membership numbers are in hard decline, and as recruitment in particular is suffering really bad (the bosozoku "nursery" is basically just flat out gone for example) the average age of those who remain is starting to get outright geriatric.
Trying to get all of that with ~50 000 USD and your resort will likely end up being more Fyre than Epstein, etc.
They really need to get with the times. Yeah the old-school biker gang doesn't exist anymore but there are still plenty of disillusioned youth with shitty future prospects, no father figure in their life, etc, which have traditionally been the source of young recruits for the yakuza. The difference is today those people can be found online rather than hanging around in public. The customer base for the Yakuza--people who want sex, gambling, drugs, loans, etc, is only growing.
The disillusioned youth of today don't want to start doing household chores at the arse end of the strict yakuza hierarchy. Especially since the yakuza's loss of visibility, prestige and youth has taken a lot of shine out of the supposed reward at the other end of the heyazumi and shatei hustle. And the executives aren't going to make any real changes to that, they didn't suffer through being at the bottom to not getting to enjoy the newcomer's subservience now that they're on top.
While it has made crime a lot more off the books, informal and underground, that also means crime has gotten a lot less, well, yakuza.
>Membership numbers
It's all off the books stuff anon. They have official offices and whatnot, but the anti yakuza laws have just made things less publicized and more underground.
what are we doing as yakuza?
Selling drugs? Astroturfing "Idol" singers? Strong-arming businesses? Smuggling weapons? Filming JAV and recruiting young women to the adult industry?
It really fucking depends because some require you to have control over warehouses and ports, therefore surveillance and guns and armor to use against hard targets.
others require you to have a presence in town and around shopping districts and schools, so bats, knives, rope and chains, lots of chains, to use on softer targets
and some require you to force your way into recruitment for business, scalp employees from other firms, network with foreign companies, and most of your money goes into shell companies, taxes, fees, office space, and all that bullshit to cover your tracks and seem like a legitimate business
If its just your weeb anime bullshit yakuza i'd just get everyone a helmet, a motorcycle, a revolver, and we'd rob cars and bystanders while ambushing cops until the money runs dry
If it's uncensored porn, 50 million yen starting cash ain't cutting it, since IIRC you have to produce it outside Japan via a non-Japanese shell company, so you'll need to fly to a foreign location, plus all the ancillary admin staff hires.
Uncensored hanime may be easier to pull off, but I think it still has to be done via a shell company, and, of course, the potential profit is lower (unless it's phenomenally-well made hanime, we're talking Bible Black/La Blue Girl/Urotsukidouji golden-age-of-hanime-tier story and production values, which don't come cheap).
>you have to produce it outside Japan via a non-Japanese shell company, so you'll need to fly to a foreign location, plus all the ancillary admin staff hires
They just use Hong Kong where it's all legal and wages are still pretty low.
>since IIRC you have to produce it outside Japan
If you were following the law, yeah. But it's not like the Yakuza is known for that.
>potential profit from hanime
I doubt that even the high-dollar productions pay off. The last super-high-budget H anime I can think of was Front Innocent and it wasn't exactly a cash cow.
Does all uncensored JAV have to be filmed outside Japan? I'm pretty sure companies the big companies that make uncensored JAV film in Japan.
God why do the Jap's hate porn so much. It's like their number one cultural export.
Imagine if Americans hated hamburgers this much.
>God why do the Jap's hate porn so much. It's like their number one cultural export.
They don't want to be known for that. It's why the one-piece mizugi isn't used in Japanese high schools anymore: perverts exploited that one particular design.
Most countries would kill for that level of soft power man. Don't you think that Sudan would rather be known for its porn than its poverty and infighting?
I say lean into your strengths man.
>50 million yen
You can't even buy a half-decent middle class cuckshed in Tokyo for that you idiot.
I don't train anyone. I hire already seasoned professionals.
Well it’s japan so the cops literally wouldn’t shoot you unless you are actively in the middle of killing someone. There’s not much to worry about.
OP is either a Zoomer who just played Yakuza 0. Or a Baby Boomer/GenXr who's been living under a rock since the late 80s, and didn't know about the Japanese Crash of the 90s until now.
The yakuza is actually very limited in its firepower.
I bring Detroit-style gang on gang brutality to the table and drag anybody who gets in my way into a basement wet-room.
kek imagine dropping American moron gangs in Japan and letting them run wild against the Yakuza. I don't even have an idea what would happen but shit would be funny.
I hope, really hope that the Japs would fuck them up, kill them all, every single one. Asians are pragmatic, they know a cancer when they see one, and I'm sure they'd act accordingly.
Take a shower, Rupert
The Yakuza actually scoop up most of the mixed race kids in Japan. This is why you play as Ichiban in Yakuza: Like a Dragon, a half-black half-japanese man who is the son of a prostitute and a random john raised in a soapland until he dropped out of middle-school.
The Yakuza series in particular tends to take a magnifying glass to the sections of Japanese society that they like to pretend doesn't exist, like the Chinese-Japanese, or Korean-Japanese, sex workers, the homeless, etc.
Same reason organized crime happens in every country. Ethnic minorities are deprived of societal acceptment and advancement, so they band together and set up informal (ie illegal) economies to earn a paycheck.
Second response meant for
Ichiban isn't half black wtf
They talk about it in the first hour of the game. Did you think he was just a tan japanese guy with funky hair?
>Did you think he was just a tan japanese guy with funky hair?
His barber fucked up his hairstyle, because nobody knows how to do it anymore.
Yeah, cause she's never worked with black people hair, she even mentions that 'I've never worked with your kind of hair before' when she apologizes for the bad haircut.
He's not biracial. The only other times characters have been non-Japanese or half-Japanese, they always made a big song and dance about it, like the black kid at the orphanage or all the Chinese or all the Chinese or Korean characters who mention it all the time.
The stylist fucked up his hairstyle because he wanted a punch perm (popular before he went to prison) and they had never done it before (it's out of fashion nowadays).
This moron either never finished the game or is just fucking with you. Stop falling for the bait.
>deprived of societal acceptment
>illegal economies to earn a paycheck
Fuck that, low IQ coupled with abuse within families makes horrible and violent people predisposed to crime.
Right. Cause we all know the Italians are genetically low IQ. Hence the crime.
Italian doctors, lawyers, teachers, engineers didn't flock to America, the low skilled, low class, poorly educated did, and believe it or not social class is a very good indicator of IQ.
Yeah I'm not a classist.
Point being the Italians formed gangs alongside the Irish and other immigrant populations back when they were put into the slums of the big cities. But once they started making middle class lifestyles as the anti-immigrant fervor of the day subsided, the power of those mobs dissapated and went away (at least in the US).
Same is true of every community. People only turn to crime cause they're poor. Or rather if they're rich, they do rich-people crime like trying to sell NFT's.
>Italian organized crime dissipated
Given the cultural background a lot of them came from, it's no surprise that their criminal activities have persisted. It may surprise you to know that Italy also has a problem with organized crime.
Well yeah. I would assume Italy isn't a utopian country where no italians do any crimes in Italy.
It may surprise you to know this, but there are Americans in America who do crime, and Chinese in China who do crime.
Crime isn't something genetic unless you wanna say '100% of crime on earth is done by human beings' in which case, yeah I suppose it is genetic then. Like driving cars.
There is a considerable cultural element to it, and not all poor people just do a crime to get by. There is a subset of particularly nasty people who are inclined toward it, and they tend not to be very bright and also rather violent.
Maybe. And I agree most criminals tend to be dumb- most people think past step one and figure they're likely to be caught if they commit a crime.
But that sort of opportunistic crime is very different from the phenomena of organized crime- which I maintain is largely economic in function. After all, why work the same job for the same pay, but one job means the Cops are much more likely to arrest you? Unless crime pays more than an honest days work? Does anyone ever do crime because it'll pay worse than a 9-5?
>low skilled, low class, poorly educated did
(You) are not low skilled, low class or poorly educated, because of your IQ, (You) are low skilled, low class and poorly educated because your parents are.
I give him a confused face because all of my anime training hasnt prepared me to understand the Kansai dialect
The greatest romance anime of all time is in Kansai-ben
Sorry I didnt watch Boku no Pico
Fist of the North Star?
U are already dead
NANI
Bicycles and energy drinks.
>50 million yen in cash by your boss in Osaka, who
That's like $3000 in real money.
>How do you equip and train your men
Random black market weapons
Airsoft games but the team that loses gets water boarded so they feel the adrenaline while shooting each other
There is likely severe competition in Tokyo already, and that's only about $340k USD. Instead, I use the money to put the men through police training, so they gain firearms training, employment, and connections as police officers. The gang can then securely operate in jurisdictions where police surveillance is done by covert gang members.
Forgot to ask, does it have to be current-day, or can we choose the time period this takes place in?
I start a junior idols studio
33-34 years ago, if you were yakuza, you could just produce soft pizza and camouflage it as "art photo books".
Trick question, Japan has some of the most strict gun control laws in the world so I'm completely safe 🙂
Armies of lawyers, politicians, locksmiths, cops, judges, dockworkers and warehouse personnel on my payroll.
Also, a private resort on an island where I invite VIPs, CEOs etc to spend some quality time with top-tier hookers, some who are considerably under 18yrs-old, with everything being secretly recorded of course
Outrage 1 and 2 were boring by-the-numbers gangster movies and I'm tired of pretending otherwise
Well first of all. I don't advertise my family's location by putting the name of the gang in big fucking letters over some office building. We go underground like triads or traditional mafias do. We don't wear pins with our gang symbol or dress like typical gangsters. We run the "head office" out of a traditional square business like a restaurant or something. No easy target. Then I fly them to Okinawa and pay off some sleazebag marines to sell them weapons and training. Simple as
I kill myself immediately
Do something to exploit the manlet status of your rivals
Yakuza are almost all zainichis especially at the boss levels
change my identity and run away with the money. Thats what you get for trusting yakuza oyabun