Why I never enlisted

Why I never enlisted

  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Dehydrated piss or blood?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      i hope it's rust stains

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The blood mushroom tried to escape.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >blood mushroom
        You are gentleman and a scholar, anon

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Thanks for reminding me guy. It’s not like purposely forgot about the navy guy.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          QRD?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous
            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >Smells like ass sweat

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              how can you be an adult and think stomp tampons down a drain is a good idea

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Women aren't adults

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Surely this isn't a military-only problem? There's adults out there stomping shit down drains, not wiping right and generally folks lacking common sense in the civilian sector as well....right?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Churkas after they are done rampaging through the mobik barracks

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      What animal pisses in the shower?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Someone who gets in the shower and then has to piss?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          me

          >he doesn't piss in the shower
          you don't know the first thing about efficiency anon

          piss in the sink. shit in the shower. you filthy savages.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >shit in the shower.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I sneezed one time on the boat in the shower, and I shit out a small turd. That was the last bodily product I had go down the drain.
              I felt bad because even after it was down the drain, it smelled like shit.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Koreans. And they choose a shower stall next to someone and piss all over your feet.
          >t. never be in a dorm with Korean guys

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >they choose a shower stall next to someone and piss all over your feet
            Based

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              that's gross but at least he wasn't going in the closet or something.
              no damage done.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        me

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >he doesn't piss in the shower
        you don't know the first thing about efficiency anon

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Someone who gets in the shower and then has to piss?

        me

        >he doesn't piss in the shower
        you don't know the first thing about efficiency anon

        Do you boys ever clean your teeth while having a wee? I found it very convenient. You can just spit the paste right into the bowel!

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I do sometimes yeah but normally when I have to piss doesn't align exactly with when I brush my teeth. I usually do it right after or right before.
          Also I use charcoal to brush with so I also dont want my toiled bowl looking like a lovecraftian monster died in it.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I do this sometimes
          You always finish the piss first, so there's plenty of time for the final drops to leave your cock and not stain your underwear
          the brushing motion also helps with this

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Usually when the water warms up in the shower. Then I shave and piss in there. Sometimes shit first too, but I have a bidet so I don't NEED to shit before showering to have a clean ass.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I pee into the shower while I wait for it to warm up. Saves water and time when I am actually in the shower.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >while I wait for it to warm up
          That's like 5 seconds.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I've had a shower take up to a minute to warm up. Depends how far away it is from your water heater. Our water heater was across the garage across a three bedroom house + kitchen + living room.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Not when the fucking contractors bury uninsulated copper pipe in concrete.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        women

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Me.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Lord have mercy

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          SOVL

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Imagine that hair all over your feet, feeling it tangle up in your toes, hnnnng I'm gonna bust.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Just be happy that no one pisses on you while showering

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        question is who doesnt

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      could just be some kind of mineral like iron or something

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >could just be some kind of mineral like iron or something
        Can confirm
        >t. contractor who gets paid $52,000/yr to go around to all the basic training showers nationwide and dump ziploc bags of iron oxide powder onto the wet floors in one spot.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Fucking military spending

          Got any other good grifts?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          so is she the unit fleshlight or what?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The recruit that causes the most problems for everybody else gets the golden shower treatment. That spot is the firing range.

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    sorry meps denied you bro

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Fucking MEPS
      Assholes medically DQ'd me because of my thyroid.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        like it was in your records or they checked your levels?

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You get over it pretty quickly.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Bloody anal rape?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      sorry meps denied you bro

      you get used to rape? Or get used to being a welfare queen? Or both?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Never been raped.
        Military paid for my schooling to be 01 sparky.
        Now I make almost 70 an hour in the Seattle area (I dont live in the shit city)

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Just don't drop the soap, pretty boy

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    in my experience everyone was very positive and life affirming during your mandatory daily penis inspections

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >in my experience everyone was very positive and life affirming during your mandatory daily penis inspections
      "Beautiful piece of equipment Jerome, did I ever tell you that?"

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Went to the oldest barracks at Benning for basic and we still had individual shower bays

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      but what will you do during deployment

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Individual showers there too. Bagram barracks on Disney had shower bays with curtains, my other postings were all SOF shit so life was good

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          even COPs had single bay showers. even the ODA OPs i worked at had single bay showers.

          sounds comfy

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            US deployments are generally epic comfy compared to rest of world, but PTSD is real.

            My tent's heat pump malfunctioned just before I went on shift and the horror of contemplating the possibility of nocturnal sweating scarred my soul. Fortunately Prime Beef peeps replaced it before end of day shift so I was not physically inconvenienced, but the pain remains for life.

            War is hell, broskis.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              lucky guy you

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Thank you for your service.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              thank you for your service.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              dank u fo u servizza

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        even COPs had single bay showers. even the ODA OPs i worked at had single bay showers.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        When I was deployed in the sandbox we had individual shower stalls. Didn't always have hot water though. Had marines show up to our tiny little base and immediately they all started shitting in the showers. That surprised me because 82nd Airborne is the one with the reputation for waffle stomping on deployment.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >immediately they all started shitting in the showers
          Why?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            marines are retarded gays thats why

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Were you at the one with the big rock, right at sand hill? I did mine there in 09, we were one of the last cycles that weren't allowed nightly cell phones and got to experience the veg omelet. We were blessed.
      Rock stready dril saant

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Of all the shit vets warn you about to convince you from not joining up, and this is what you focus on?
    > Not the dead end contracting or security gigs filled with 11Bs with 0 other civilian prospects
    > Not the randon outbursts of grief over dead friends triggered by the most obscure shit imaginable
    > Not the busted knees, the alcoholism, the anger issues, the risk seeking behaviors

    Nope, instead you never got over having to shower in athletics and you're still scared someone will look at your ding-a-ling and laugh. Come on, man.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Yes, some lines can't be crossed.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >alcoholism, the anger issues, the risk seeking behaviors

      thats just you meighty

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      For me, it's that I don't want to have to have a buzzcut or deal with woke office politics and "inclusiveness" seminars except I can't just quit like at a civilian job

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >doesn't run naked into battle, wearing nothing but the blood of his enemies, terrifying them to the core with his massive dong, engorged with bloodlust
    Lemme guess, you're a grower?

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    that pic is so comfy and it takes me back to the 90s

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Wtf what if someone sees my pee pee? Could I shower in some shorts?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Could I shower in some shorts?
      In basic/OSUT probably not, it's up to the command to allow it which they won't because they want you to not be a bitch. After that though, you can shower however you like they're not micromanaging you that hard in the operational army.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      If you're actually that sensitive and weak you need to force yourself to unass that shit, especially before the mandatory dedovschina.

      True warriors regard being spitroasted as a profound bonding experience and the subsequent geyser of bloody santorum a badge of honor.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        How do I make myself sexy for the big night?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Just get liquored up

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      No, you have to be humiliated in order to be controlled like a good goy

  11. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The only place I've seen that has group showers is a National Guard barracks I went to for RSP. They got rid of them pretty much everywhere else. Even so man up, group showers aren't that bad.

  12. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You wouldn't be able to resist looking at dicks, huh?

  13. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Wtf is that the shower in a submarine? what's with the periscopes

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Hark at Little Lord fucking Fauntleroy.

  15. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    S M A L L D I C K

  16. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Imagine dropping the soap

  17. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Complaining about three months worth of public shower bays
    That’s why you wear shower shoes.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >That’s why you wear shower shoes.
      Switching to sandals for my footwear is one of my best decisions.

  18. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Worried they'd see your erection?

  19. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What am I supposed to be looking at here besides the rust stain on the floor?

  20. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    A quick G.I. party would clean that up in a couple of hours. Where is that from?

  21. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Didn't want anyone to see your little dick, huh?

  22. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why I never enlisted

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That pattern sucked. The Army paid billions of dollars only to get their own soldiers killed due to how shitty it was.

  23. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Imagine not slapping your boys' asses and helicoptering your dick for amusement, pathetic.

  24. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    How do you hide your boner?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You don't! Why would you? Hang a wet towel on it. Be proud.

  25. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    just how many millions we talking here chaim.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Shame on you

  26. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    But these are comfy, anon.

  27. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >PrepHole full of fags worrying about seeing their little peepees
    >me remembering being part of full platoon trains on thai hookers multiple times
    How the fuck do any of you exist in the real world?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Behold, the e-8 in his natural habitat. If left to his own devices, he will continously destroy any marriage into which he enters.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >>me remembering being part of full platoon trains on thai hookers multiple times
      what was that like?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        ask your mom

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Considering that he's probably Navy his attention was more on the other sailors than the hookers.

  28. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >get done working out
    >go to bathroom to piss
    >glance at the shower
    >it's always a bunch of literal boomers all huddled around the showerheads in the nude

    What happened to cause this generation gap? Why are the older generations so comfortable with each others' benises? Some sort of sweeping change in the public education system?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      All raised in a nude vs non-nude family. Or just too damn old to give a shit.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      They were forced to get naked together for showers or swimming as kids so they quickly got over it. OP never has so it's alien and forbidden to him.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >forced
        Wtf why didn't they call their lawyer

  29. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    nobody's gonna rape you moron

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'd rape him, an exposed hole is a hole that needs to learn

  30. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You people are disgusting.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Oh I'm sorry were you expecting good hygiene from PrepHole users?

  31. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    So is it gay to wash your arse while surrounded by others? You know just quickly wipe in between your cheeks.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Nope, even a quick wipe is SUPER gay bro. Your assigned platoon sgt will let everyone know when it's their individual time to go butt wash.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Your assigned platoon sgt will let everyone know when it's their individual time to go butt wash.
        sounds about right for the military

  32. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    In basic at ft Jackson I had individual shower stalls with curtains. You're just a pussy

  33. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    What the fuck. Hope who ever did that is dead

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >who ever did that
      It's called corn-holing, son.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It's called small dick white boy shit

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Don't be mad the dildo isn't black.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Says the moron white-knighting for a dead animal.

  34. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What kind of man hasn't showered with other dudes by the time he enlists?
    It's like you're some kind of PrepHole nerd who didn't play sports or something.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >It's like you're some kind of PrepHole nerd who didn't play sports or something.

      Yeah, I am. By the time I enlisted, I had only ever worked in auto-tech and helped my dad work on cars. You know how bothered I was when I saw sixteen dicks in the showers? The first time I was a little unnerved, but I got over it because we were too busy hazing the guy that didn't want to shower.

  35. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Dumb question but somewhat on topic. How unconformable would to be to shower with a gay male with tits. Asking for myself.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Like, a chud, or just a really fat fag?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I'm on hrt so take a guess.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Very fucking uncomfortable then, trannies trigger a natural uncanny valley feeling in most normal people, 41% isn't high enough.

  36. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Imagine slipping on someone’s nut

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >yellow jelly
        That mental image

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        https://i.imgur.com/zKGE4Fy.png

        these two greentexts make me shudder to think of what its like inside a woman's prison. Imagine that but no one ever cleans it out.

  37. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    During the showers I saw a guy that had micropenis
    He was like 6’3” and was actually very confident and walked around naked all the time

  38. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Damn my reason for not enlisting is not wanting to obey the enemy but that is fucked, I've literally been in jails with better showers that had stalls and curtains, that's fucked right there.

  39. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Why I never enlisted

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'd liberate that gold any day

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Yes you would, because orders are orders, but you wouldnt get to keep any of it because it all belongs to J.P. Morgan now.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I don't think I'd really get a chance to take any to be honest. Hasn't there been numerous SOF guys getting caught taking funds meant to "persuade" local militias?

  40. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    We had individual showers in basic, granted they were fairly new barracks. That was back in 2021

  41. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Why I never enlisted

  42. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Where the fuck is that, doesn't look like any usmc or navy facility. Also you only use group showers during bootcamp

  43. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You don't want to bond with your buddies with some gay sex in the showers?

  44. 4 weeks ago
    Sage

    I never saw showers like this in the US Army. Every bathroom is scrubbed daily by locally stationed soldiers or thos on extra duty as punishment.
    This assuredly the bathroom of some 2nd world conscript nation.

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