In my country owning guns for self defense is illegal and killing a perpetrator with a gun in self defense Carries a sentence of at least 1 year in federal prison. Pepper spray is illegal for self defense for some fucking reason, and using a knife to defend yourself will land you with a prison sentence because of a “mutilation and attempted murder charge”. With all of these how can I defend myself? I have a metal baseball bat but I doubt I can defend myself well against a burglar or hoodlum that is armed with a knife or gun very well. There has been an immense increase of violent acts in areas near my neighborhood.
Insurrection
Napalm
moving out
nukes
Juicy liquid napalm made from gasoline congealed with wild hog's blood, loaded on a self-destructing kamikaze quadcopter. Piloted from a remote hidden trailer in the woods via relay, crashing into a decripit abandoned slave plantation mansion, ablaze in the swamp in the cool dead of night. Reach into mini fridge, grab a Dr. Pepper, crack it open, call it a night.
Bubbafied machine shop IEDs strapped to a quadcopter and piloted on a tablet from inside a pickup truck by a fella named Steve. Destroying jets on tarmac and platoons of armored vehicles worth millions, occupying and oppressing the people under martial law.
Platoons of guerrilla snipers with high powered ARs, leaf suits, and thermal blocking carrying out devastating ambushes on fascist lockdown checkpoints, forward counter-insurgency camps, and armored patrols.
One-on-one underground battles in caves in tunnels over guerrilla bases with regular patrols, some rigged with traps and others rigged as decoys. No air support, in the dark, even hand-to-hand with knives and fists.
A protracted counter-insurgency an attempt to suppress popular revolt and insurrection that results in total overthrow and abolishment of the zionist occupied federal government of the United States of America once and for all. The establishment of a new government, a nation and a republic restored. Hope, peace, and prosperity. A leadership that cares and invests in our long-term future.
You get my vote anon.
What do the Criminals get for their crimes, A nice stay in a comfy hotel?
Essentially which they’re fine with because they’re disgusting criminals but me as a person with a job and career and social life to think of i don’t want to spend even a day in a jail no matter how “nice” it is since I don’t want my freedom taken away because I tried to defend myself
Somewhere in Scandinavia?
If someone is trying to murder you or someone else, just shoot them. Kill them by whatever means you have available. Don't worry about the consequences, just preserve life. It's that simple.
depends on the complexion of the criminal and the crime. are you a somali who raped a little girl? are you a Syrian or a Turk who raped a German girl? Both get a slap on the wrist, a box of chocolates, and get released the same day. Are you a fairer complexioned native inhabitant of either Germany or Sweden who violently defended themselves from violence committed by said Somalis, Syrians, and Turks? Well you’re gonna have to be put in prison for a decade for defending yourself and rustling a hair on an upper caste members head. Meanwhile the assailants again get a slap on the wrist and a box of chocolates.
Get into crime and attack all potential robbers and burglars first to establish dominance
Literally the best defense is to move. Clearly self defense is considered a crime where you live so what kind of advice can I give you? Learn martial arts? Fucking move.
If only that were so simple I can’t just fucking move because 1. I would have to sell my house which nobody is going to fucking buy and 2. The only people I know and love live in my area and 3. Moving to another country is not that fucking easy, granted I do have a swiss citizenship but I would be leaving behind everything I love for nothing more than just a bit of safety.
Ok then sit at home like a scared woman clutching a bat or move.
How close will "everything you love" be while you're in prison? I'm hoping you'll at least get conjugal visits.
Unironically your best bet might be a riveted male shirt, some gloves and a poleaxe.
You can get that shit on in like 4 seconds and It’s not hard to poke and chop a guy if all he has is a knife and you’re aggressive about it.
Gun would be better though.
Now that sounds like a proper self Defense
>using a knife to defend yourself will land you with a prison sentence because of a “mutilation and attempted murder charge”
Now imagine what kind of sentence the judge will throw at him over a lance/battle axe. OP lives in a country that has told him "you WILL let yourself be killed by foreigners or you WILL go to jail" and he has come to accept that because he has friends and a shitty house in a state that is cucked beyond belief.
The difference being a knife is registered with the police whereas a recreation of what is essentially a historical weapon would be argued as an ornament and not a weapon. The law is fucked. Also yes of course it’s just because I have a couple of friend not because I have spent my entire life in this nation and I have a family that I care for and abandoning them isn’t really something I can do maybe a PrepHole homosexual like you is completely fine with abandoning loved ones if you even have any considering they fact that you’re most likely a giant retard.
>knife is registered with the police
OP must be in bongland or some shit, maybe germany. Christ.
>maybe germany.
Germany doesn't have a registry for knives. Some types you are not allowed to carry openly, others are best left at home, everything that can be argued as a tool is at worst taken to the police station and you need to pick it up there with an appropriate bag (e.g. one that can be locked for transport).
And speaking of self defense in Germany: You can do whatever the fuck you want. There is no such thing as "using too much force" - if you think whatever you used was the means of least force to stop whatever crime was happening it was not too much.
There will be a police investigation and you should let your lawyer do the talking, as with every interaction with the police, but the moment a judge rules that you acted in self defense whatever you did becomes lawful (for this specific situation). And if you acted lawfully you can't be punished for whatever you did.
There are some nuances to that (e.g. using your illegal fire arm still gets you in hot water for owning an illegal fire arm; provoking the other guy to "act in self defense" once he snaps won't work) but that is best handled by shutting the fuck up and letting a lawyer do the talking.
t. German that drank a lot with law students during my studies.
Bierjunge
Would deadly force on a burglar who does not physically threaten/attack you (but is in your house) be accepted? It does mention property as a reason, but the last sentence in 34 StGB does seem to require some form of proportionality in averting the "danger", but I could be wrong.
Dead men tell no tales, shoot to kill.
>i wont sacrifice myself for my family which i love
>i will allow them to be subjected to violent crime because i am afraid of a 6 month stay in a cushy euro jailcell where i will only get ps4 and not ps5
I ask for help and use my statement as a way of finding some way I can Loophole my way out of going to jail and finding a way to legally defend myself effectively. This doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t fucking risk jail time by killing someone who is trying to harm anyone I care about you fucking idiot
>finding some way I can Loophole my way out of going to jail
Maybe start by telling which country you live in.
Norway. I don’t see how this is exactly going to help seeing as I’ve stated the relevant parameters and the law is pretty strict
Just kill any intruders with a strategically placed decorative harpoon, and claim that you had mistaken the burglar for a whale
https://www.spyshop.no/swedish-body-armour-forsvarsspray.html
Also it looks pretty easy to get a gun in Norway, idk
When you buy a firearm or a “self defense weapon” the authorities are informed of your purchase and if you use it in self defense they will investigate you and pretty easily be able to charge you. specifically if you want to own a gun at all you have to get permission from the police and in certain cases if you have to be an active member of a shooting club to legally be even considered to be allowed to own one.
Hunting license
Huh, Wikipedia said that sprays were illegal, but if not, get one to go with your halberd.
So you get fucked by the duty to retreat (from within your own house nonetheless), not necessarily by your ownership laws for weapons: Getting a hunting license seems doable, it's just that the gun safe might make it difficult to get to in time. You also can't use the 'classical' loophole of antique guns, since those are actually *harder* to get there.
Your goal should be then to deter and/or cause maximum pain without permanent damage. Normally bear mace would be an option, but that's illegal there apparently, so going fucking medieval with a polearm might be the way to go.
Alternatively get the gun anyway and just shoot the fucker and take the minimum prison sentence if it's a life or death situation.
Sorry you're getting screwed over, you need to do some deep thinking about when you're willing to have to go on trial vs risk dying.
This. You have an advantage over almost all other melee weapons, and not many intruders would risk charging at someone armed with fucking poleaxe.
And, in case you stab some retard that didn't get the memo, you can go for "it's just some old ass decorative peace that I grabbed to defend myself because it was the only thing nearby"
What country
I guarantee you that no actual jury in the west, regardless of the letter of the law, would actually convict you for reasonable self defense against people trying to kill you
I’m my country 2 years ago a 75 year old man was sentenced to 1 year in prison for killing two intruders who had the intent of murdering him. And my country doesn’t have a jury system.
>no jury system
Uh, hmm. Singapore, South Africa, India, Japan?
>No peppers spray
Canada, Japan, India? This is a fun challenge. I'm guessing India.
Canada still has strong self defense laws and court precedent, though the crown prosecutors will drastically misrepresent what happened to try and get a conviction. They will also drag their feet and try to turn the process into a punishment. While pepper spray for humans is illegal, bear spray isn't. It's completely weak sauce though, since environmentalists don't want the Grizzly eating your face to be harmed.
>just lay down and die so others won’t be inconvenienced
what an assbackwards world we live in. everything is completely inverted.
They certainly tried with Kyle Rittenhouse.
Who is that
A good sized metal pole, think broomstick sized, but you want something tough.
Emigrate at all costs.
My country this, muh country that. If you don’t name the fucking country nobody can help you.
This, OP, laws in each country are REALLY specific, we can't do anything to help you without knowing the country.
Get a big meat grinder
>There has been an immense increase of violent acts in areas near my neighborhood.
Migrants eh?
this is what op is afraid of ending up in lmao
Youre forgetting that i Will most likely lose my job and you know HAVE A MURDER CHARGE on me after I get out. Also I don’t know if you truly understand this but prison no matter how nice it may seem it is not a place of comfort since you are kept to a strict schedule and you are watched 24/7 and you’re also not allowed to leave you fucking retard. Also that is not what my country’s prison cells look like it’s probably what they look like for teenagers but not adults I have seen the inside of a local prison and the only luxury is an old ass windows computer and a mattress on a metal framed bed and the cells are pretty fucking small and disgusting.
So are you in Norway or what you fucking homosexual
If you're deathly afraid of jail time and cucked out of legal self defense then avoid having to defend yourself at all retard.
Move out of your shitty neighborhood.
If you're too poor for that then you need to make your home more annoying for criminals to deal with than other nearby houses. Get a dog. Install motion activated exterior lights and security cams. Get a stronger door and add additional locks. Secure your windows.
Make even the stupidest criminal look at your house and decide your neighbors will wake up and call the cops on them before they manage to get inside and grab anything valuable.
If you're too stupid and poor to do that just remember you're fighting on home turf. You know the layout of your house better than invaders. You have time to plan and prepare.
If they won't have guns you can defend a chokepoint like a hallway or doorway with staff or polearm, something with a reach advantage over a knife. Rig up loud alarms or sirens, something to wake up your neighbors and disorient the criminals (OODA loop). You live in a cucked country, remember the goal isn't to kill them, it's to make them decide leaving with what they got is a better choice than assaulting you to get the rest of your stuff, or to hold out until the cops show up.
If they will have guns forget about the chokepoint, barricade yourself in a room until the cops show up. You haven't mentioned dependents so I'm assuming you're a single homosexual, so just lock yourself in your bedroom and make sure they can't break down the door. The alarms are still a good idea, if they realize they're on a time limit it'll be less likely for them to waste time getting into your single room vs smashing and grabbing the rest of your house and fleeing.
Just googled Norway Prison and I'm genuinely depressed that this thread exists.
pneumatic speargun, barrel, bags of lye. don't call the police under any circumstance
Become a criminal, then you are untouchable
Kill them anyway by the highest means you have and dispose of the body. Fucking cucks I swear, you have to ask how to be violent and break bullshit rules put upon you by rich assholes. Just do what the fuck you need to do.
Tan lotion and use Ahmed as alias.
You know the rules, tell us the country so we can give you specific advice or we'll just assume you're an underage larping doomer homosexual.
shoot. shovel. shut up.
ideally make them do the digging.
Just get a gun for sports or hunting and use some necessity-related legal exception if shit hits the fan as your legal defense. Also, if you're really worried, find a good lawyer that actually worked a few self-defense cases. If your country doesn't recognize necessity as a legal defense, it's probably time to leave.
OP is a retard.
I'm also Norwegian.
I own Guns. Hunting license. Several Semi auto rifles and Shotguns. I am a paramedic, My wife is a lawyer and prosecutor for the state.(Rogaland) She used to be a cop. We have a 4 year old child. My wife and I have discussed self defense many times. Anyone enters our home and intends us bodily harm will get shot by me or her. Of course there will be an investigation, but we say the intruder threathened to kill us and our Child so we had to shoot him. We will not face charges, if we do we will beat the charges in court.
OP is a retard and a Fag.
Get licenced. Get Guns. Protect your family. Fuck naggers. Have a nice Day.
Also forgot to adress OPs lie about registering knives. WTF. There is no registration of knives. All knives are sold over the counter in Norway. Just like suppressors and brown cheese.
Maybe it's different in Oslo?
Your situation is different than OP’s. Need to defend your spouse or child lets you disregard duty to retreat in eyes of the law, same thing in Finland.
hopes and prayers
Slaves aren't allowed to defend themselves. Move.
a gun
1 year in prison > stabbed to death
I would have guessed Australia, here a home intruder can sue you if he trips over breaking into your house.
Anything used as a weapon is illegal, even if improvised.
You need photo ID to buy a knife, and you can't buy a packet of plastic butterknives if you're under 16.
A knife becomes illegal to own if you write a "threatening slogan" on it.
Forget guns. I got a friend in a shooting club, he had a weed bust, so they raided his house, took his gun collection, and one cop got in his face and told him "We're the only ones allowed to have guns, you cunt!"
He's been trying to get his licence back for years now.
Australia sounds like a hellscape, no offense given though.
>A knife becomes illegal to own if you write a "threatening slogan" on it.
Why would you write on your knife? That sounds like a BS law to stick more (or any one to begin with) charges on members of gangs and other undesirables you can't get off the street otherwise.
>Would deadly force on a burglar who does not physically threaten/attack you (but is in your house) be accepted?
Yes, there is no balancing of interest between the law that's being broken and how forceful you react to that. You should try other means before you start shooting (shouting/a warning shot) but it is accepted that if you find yourself in such a situation it can't be expected of you to do things by the book.
One really important part in German law is the concept of "gängige Rechtssprechung", meaning that the written law needs to be interpreted by the courts. They should take things like societal norms and intend of the lawmakers into consideration. Going back to self defense, the intend of the law is to prevent punishing citizens for upholding the law by force in a situation in which peaceful ways or waiting until the police arrives is not possible - upholding the order of law is deemed more important than protecting the rights of those that decided to go against the law (e.g. protection from bodily harm when you try to rob someone).
Self defense is regulated in § 32 StGB, § 34 StGB is only used if no other clause can be used. It's a catch all default case for those corner cases that can't be planned ahead for.
Here are some pdfs from a law professor that explain the differences, they are in German though, pushing them through deepl should give acceptable results:
https://litter.catbox.moe/i2ut0c.pdf (Overview for a better understanding)
https://litter.catbox.moe/ht5vcv.pdf § 32 StGB
https://litter.catbox.moe/fa69n5.pdf § 34 StGB
phrases deepl has it's problems with:
h.M. means "herrschende Meinung" "prevailing opinion"
str. means "strittig" "debatable"
It was the "Zombie Knife Law", and it was as bullshit as it sounds, but bullshit law is the law here.
https://www.police.nsw.gov.au/online_services/firearms/permits/zombie_knives_legislative_amendment/frequently_asked_questions_-_zombie_knives_legislative_amendment
I wish it was a joke. This is reality for us. Some cunt got payed to write this, some cunt made it a law, and there are IQ-capped pigs with guns to fucking enforce it. WE ARE IN HELL.
>live in communist state
>WTF why can't I defend myself
It's a mystery.
Get a bunch of the strongest peppers you can find and put them in a blender with water. Once you thoroughly pureed them, strain the mixture and keep the liquid. Get some kosher salt and dunk it in the chili water. Put it out in a baking sheet to dry and now you have chili salt that you can throw in your assailant's eyes. Just say it's a seasoning in court. Also, get one of those 6 cell maglites; you can cave the perp's skull in and dodge the weapons charges because you just happened to have the flashlight in hand when you discovered the intruder. Another possible weapon is a high powered laser (one that can light things on fire) to shine in the attacker's eyes. If these ideas sound retarded, it's because they are, but it doesn't seem like you have better options.
Get the most insanely bright flashlight you can, 1200+ lumens, make sure it's always charged. 1200 lumens is enough to blind someone in daylight.
The flashlight alone will probably deterrer them.
Get a blunt object that will work as a one handed club
-claw hammer (use it some so it looks like it was just your tool)
-larger wrench
etc., just make sure you can swing it one handed, and that it's a normal thing to own
Blind them with your flashlight in one hand, and bash their head with the blunt object you "just happen to have on hand".
and remember to workout, you are the weapon in the end
Ancient survivalist/martial arts nut here, from a hoplophobic gun-grabbing nannystate.
OP, what fucking country are you in. It's a simple fucking question and we could research your laws, we're good at that shit.
Generally, my advice is get a weight bench and a heavy bag, and review your home and vehicle security. Get security screen doors, a door chain, peephole, etc. Motion activated lights or cameras if you can afford them.
Get a tyre knocker for your car, a heavy chain and padlock for your bicycle that could smash a skull. A sparkplug wrench socket for a fistload, a plastic insert for your cap to protect your skull, steelcap sneakers, and a heavy walking stick. Consider a heavy maglite, or at least a flashlight with over 1000 lumens. Keep emergency services on speed-dial on your phone, consider a first aid course.
If you fish, get a fisherman's priest.
Maybe the motocross gloves with the plastic knuckles if you have a motorcycle or bicycle.
A money belt and a dummy wallet might be wise.
Defensive living
https://archive.org/details/Defensive_Living
Escape The Wolf by Clint Emerson
https://archive.org/details/EscapeTheWolf
The Art Of Shen Ku
https://archive.org/details/the-art-of-shen-ku-the-first-intergalactic-artform-of-the-entire-universe-pdfdrive
The Art Of Fighting Without Fighting (despite the miscataloguing, nothing to do with Aikido)
https://archive.org/details/pdfy-Nkgs9Wco_QtorhYo
Street E&E By Marc Macyoung
https://archive.org/details/Street_EE_By_Marc_Macyoung_Paladin_Press
Cheap Shots, Ambushes, and Other Lessons
https://archive.org/details/cheap-shots-ambushes-and-other-lessons-paladin-press
Barroom Brawling: The Art of Staying Alive...
https://archive.org/details/barroom-brawling
Surviving Edged Weapons
Marc Macyoung Winning A Street Knife Fight
Marc "Animal" MacYoung - Down But Not Out
>Norway
I can't believe what I just read. You can't use a gun for self-defense, because that would mean you're already anticipating a gun fight... Seriously? There's something seriously wrong with the lawmakers over there.
Yeah, initially i tought it was because of duty to retreat and laws about storage but it seems that using any kind of weapon for self defence means that in eyes of court you were anticipating confortation thus you are guilty of a crime.
>Seriously? There's something seriously wrong with the lawmakers over there.
Social democratic party
>duty to retreat
thank fuck I live in a stand your ground state
You've got a bat and you're worried about some dunce with a knife? How about try learning that blunt objects can still be used to thrust with. Even some light, cheap-ass aluminum bat is going to make someone double-over in pain if you jab them in the stomach with it. If you still need more range, find a good stick and bolt it to the end.
>Can't defend yourself
>won't move
>various Yuro cope and bitching
Learn to suck dick and carry some lube maybe they'll leave your stuff alone once the post nut clarity kicks in, you massive homo
You from denmark or something? guess the best you can do is kill the perp and hide the body, carry pepper spray regardless.
Unironically a bat and/or hammer
Convert to islam, turn yourself into the "minority".
Buy one of those trillion scoville hotsauces, mix with pure vinegar and put it into a good watergun.