This girl at work I've been trying to have sexual intercourse with for the past few months is really into hiking and camping and invited me to go on a 2 day trip with her and told me not to worry about a tent since hers is big enough, but asked me to get a sleeping bag. I assume we'll be doing the deed that night. My question is, is it a good idea? After walking all day in the woods wouldn't she get too stinky down there? Also how does pooping work in the outdoors? I'm scared, bros.
savor the flavor anon. You're going to enjoy the freedom of fricking as loud and hard as you want in isolated nature. you either dig a hole or just go squat somewhere away from camp to shit and walk away
enjoy the pheromones and to poo just dig a hole and squat
Speaking of pheromones, is it true bleeding women and fricking women attract aggressive bears?
idk but period blood tastes alright.
Yes but lucky for you the bears have no interest in women. Men, on the other hand….
No.
Yes. That's part of what got Treadwell killed.
Yeah it's not the part where he deliberately set up his camp over of a well used grizzly bear trail strategically placed so that the bears had to go through instead of around, and during a time where food was scarce.
also sharks, dont let your guard down, you never know when they'll jump from the bushes
Nice quads and no it's not true
Lemme stop ya right there https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Timothy_Treadwell
I had a buddy who took a girl PrepHole who he had been trying to bang for a few weeks or so. Asian chick. REALLY asian chick. The kind that owned a big stir fry wok and cooked with bok choy. This guy somehow convinces her to go camping with him, knowing she'd be scared shitless and therefore highly frickable. Long story short, he tells me they were going at it, loud as a pair of monkeys, when he notices deep grunting ("not hers!" He said, funny guy) he sheepishly unzipps the tent and counts 3 black bears in a sort of triangle about 9 yards out. Ruined their escapade but somehow he scored her later anyway. I told him it was probably just her stinky chink food fumes (she brought the fricking wok) but he said they hung their trash up a tree down path.
tldr: IDK i'd say OP is good as long as she's not chinese. lol.
Did you go to a special school to be stupid or did it come naturally?
You mad these white chads are slamming your b***hes with their hot beef and blasting their sweet and sour sauce on their ovaries, Chang?
I like the way you tell a tale anon
Why wouldn't he just keep railing her?
I too enjoy the way you tell a tale
>Hey guys I just wanted to come on here and tell you I'm going to have sex.
hes gonna fail miserably and its going to be 2 days of nervewrecking awkwardness and you know it
This, she's probably open to sex but obviously not 100% planning on it if she had him bring a sleeping bag. Op will frick it up and regret it for the rest of his life.
I mean he's going to need one regardless even if he fricks.
>2 people in 1 sleeping bag
Tell me you've never been PrepHole without telling me you've never been PrepHole
OP, you can google for specific precautions for fricking in the wild. Like, yeah, you'll both be sweaty, so maybe don't go down on her, and yeah, you might have poo particles smudged between your unwashed asscheeks, so maybe don't spread 'em too wide, y'know? Cavemen didn't wash but still managed to do the hanky panky, otherwise we wouldn't be here. Also the sleeping pads supposedly don't bounce as much as a bed, so something like missionary can apparently feel awkward. Doggy or having her bend over steadying her hands on a tree or something and you going from behind i supposedly a better position. But what would I know, I'm just an /PrepHole/ incel trying to hike his depression away.
It's another /PrepHole/ incel fantasy thread. Just report and move on
>I post in every single new thread complaining about the new thread but I never make threads myself. I am, turbohomosexual.
OP get drunk with her, enjoy it, don't stress out it's fun. Fricking in the bush is intense.
The smell alone is enough to make me diamonds Tbh.
A girl doesn't randomly invite someone out camping with no one else unless she wants some balls deep action.
Same thing has happened to me, before I knew it only my fat hairy nuts were hanging out of her.
I wouldn't worry about smells, wet wipes are a thing.
Unlike you
perhaps she wants a spare sleeping bag that hasnt been fricked in
anon i'm sorry but she's going to say you're a great friend
On every other board I've seen destroyed over the past few years the raiding trannies used the same tactic, they spammed tons and tons of these threads like
>what books should I read to impress this qt girl
It seems candid but there's a strategy, they're posting as much off topic shit as possible until the board accepts to have 75% off topic threads, and everyone who is actually interested in the subject has left. I've seen entire small imageboards destroyed like this. Always report and hide or at least ignore these threads if you care about this environment.
And remember, it goes in all fields
MODDDDSSSSSSSSS
Haha, seggs.
If this is real she def wants to frick.
She probably expects to be split in half and do it hella nasty.
She’s into you, but don’t be a moron. Go for a day hike first to make sure you don’t spill all your spaghetti. Then a car camp, THEN a backpack. Backpacking frick is pretty strong for a first date, and I assume you are a sperg that will drop meatballs all over the place, so go slow.
Easy don't worry too much about anything.
At most make sure you have a big thick towel.
I walked my friend chick down a trail away from onlookers.
In a bush with good sun exposure, slope and clean, make sure no ants or such.
Lay towel down and make out and soon you'll both be naked and getting all that solar sun energy up your butthole chakra.
She orgasmed so hard her legs were having seizures and I had to wait for her to get up.
Doing it in the open air is better, otherwise your sleeping bag and her tent will smell like ass and coom. Do it on the towel so you can wipe her and yourself off after and hang it somewhere away to dry and air out.
A bear might come and eat both of you for stinking up his woods if you do it in tent and the air gets stale
But surprisingly alot of the girls I have known seem to enjoy having funky cum and shiid vag smells on them for a day or two and don't wash well.
Myself I wash off at the first chance I get. I don't mind being dirty or sweaty but I don't like women squid smells on me.
>doesnt know how to poop in the woods
>doesnt know how to frick in the woods
>the WOMAN asks him on a date
Shes ugly, youre an incel, and a larper. Reported.
I have contacted s.w.a.t.
son, she thinks you are gay.
Well oppie?
Shitting in the woods is easy. Make her lay down with her shirt off. Then poop on her breasts. If you want to frick, dig a hole and lay down and stick your dick in it. Easy.
Unless you're going to brown town it won't be any different than regular ole at home vegana
They're self cleaning and regulating anon, stench don't grow too much and if it is in fact unbearable it is because it is unbearable regardless.
>im scared bros
you are def not getting the puss my friend
did you do a sexo anon?
don't b***h out bro. I haven't had sex in over 5 years. DO IT! but wear protection. the smell won't be as bad as you're making it be. unless she's fat.
It will smell like the floor of an Intercity bus.
nah I've camped with girls before. they still smell good. not sure about their vegana so probably don't eat the puss.
>not sure about their vegana
It will smell like the floor of an Intercity bus.
Good god this woman deserves better.
> how does pooping work in the outdoors?
Get a trowel, the one called The Deuce will earn you extra points. Dig a cathole hole at least 6 inches deep, 200 ft from any water source, and poop. Look up "backcountry bidet" and do that after.
Leave no trace.
You will be miserable and look like a whiny douchebag in front of this QT. Enjoy the sights, the exercise, don't get snippy with her when your little baby self gets tired, and enjoy having shot so far out of your league you're basically in space.
Don't forget to bring a toothbrush.
I hope this trip is more than a week away. Unironically go read the entire Ultralight reddit right now.
>go to reddit
I think you need to follow your own advice there, senpai. This is the wrong website for someone of your sensibilities.