Shoigu hires you to bail his ass out and salvage the Ukranian situation.

You will get 50 million dollars if you can pull it off.

Budget: 60 billion USD
Manpower: what remains of the Russian forces and anyone you can con or bribe into joining. No mobilization.
Objective: hold on to Kherson, Crimea, and Dontesk for 1 year (minimum), crush Ukraine (hard difficulty optional objective).

How do you handle it?

  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Like a true Russian, I will take 59.9 billion dollars for myself and use the remaining .1 to buy equipment that my subordinates will then sell.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      firsty besty this is the way

      https://i.imgur.com/GgnD2w7.jpg

      You will get 50 million dollars if you can pull it off.

      Budget: 60 billion USD
      Manpower: what remains of the Russian forces and anyone you can con or bribe into joining. No mobilization.
      Objective: hold on to Kherson, Crimea, and Dontesk for 1 year (minimum), crush Ukraine (hard difficulty optional objective).

      How do you handle it?

      fuck you general wood PrepHole is not helping save your ass

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Do you really believe that the Shlomo of the Ukrainian president doesn't pocket the make-a-wish foundation donations from the other countries?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        If Zelensky embezzled half the Lend Lease, that means Russia is losing to half the Lend Lease.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Russia losses to no lendlease actually, it's starting only in next month.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >whataboutinsm
        God, we fucked up when we didn't listen to Hitler. All he said was correct if applied to fucking russians.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        If Ukraine can easily fiddle Russian pussies in the North whilst embezzling all their aid then I kneel.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      actual russian answer

      I'd take 55bil same way and buy 5b worth of chinese drones with bombs

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Authentic answer

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >retreat from Ukraine
      >build giant wood versions of Ukrainian cities in Siberia
      >film our brave troops taking these cities
      >replace every map and globe inside the Kremlin with ones showing Ukraine as Russian

      I squat.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'd do this simply because the situation is completely unsalvageable, no matter how much money you throw at it. It'd take years before any reasonable plan could get up to speed.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Option 1: succeed and walk away with only $50,000,000
      >Option 2: fail and walk away with nothing but an execution waiting for you
      >Option 3: bail out with $59,000,000,000
      There is no other answer.

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I storm the Kremlin and execute all the maniacs who started this war and declare the warmongerers dead, allowing Russia to experience merely a 20 year setback rather than a 30 year one

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >causing a power vacuum in RUSSIA, where every time there is a power vacuum the government gets progressively more incompetent and filled with mafiosos

      Truly, what could go wrong.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >"no I totally don't work for the US state department"

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I will use the classic Russian strategy of pocketing as much of that 60 billion as I can.

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What's sadder is that Shoigu probably posted this thread himself.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This. Go to sleep shoigu, we're not doing your homework

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There’s no chance that Shoigu posts here, for tactical help or otherwise. I don’t even speak English.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        wait a sec

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        chotto matte kudasai

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        W.. wait a sec..

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Fuck off reddit frog poster

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >There’s no chance that Shoigu posts here
        He probably should. PrepHole said Izyum was going to get got back in April. He might have bothered to defend it if he has read it.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          God damn you anon I DO NOT HAVE A LATEX FETISH, DO YOU HEAR ME?
          I AM NOT ATTRACTED TO SKINNY LADIES IN SKIN TIGHT RUBBER SUITS. I DO NOT FIND THAT ATTRACTIVE. STOP TRYING CONFUSE ME

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >I AM NOT ATTRACTED TO SKINNY LADIES IN SKIN TIGHT RUBBER SUITS
            Why? You gay or something?

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              How does she put it on?
              And more importantly how does she take it off?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Lots of baby powder.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Post wood.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You seem trustworthy

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous
    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There's a test we can do. Post a picture of some wood and see if an anon comes angling round asking questions of where you found it. That's not an anon at all, that's Shoigu.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Het, that's some real nice wood. I'm not Shoigu, but I'd like to know where you came acrossing it?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Is it pronounced “SHOY-GOO”?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Yep.

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Hire the lowest the bidder
    >???
    >profit

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Pocket as much possible
    >Bribe the guards so me and him can bail
    >Wait this shit out on some farm in SE Asia where they grow exotic wood.

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I give all the money to Ukraine to rebuild its army, agree on a ceasefire with Zelensky, sell all Russian supplies and equipment and pocket the money.
    Then after a year Zelensky launches an offensive against a disarmed Russian army.
    The 50 million is just extra pocket money at this point.

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I convince him that we both take the 60 billion and split it down the middle and run.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr MILK?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Who is this girl, and where can I see her bare tits?
      The water mark is for he photographer and none of the reverse engine sites work.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Unless your eyes can't make out the entire watermark anon, it says Rob Cano Photography, which gave me some nice results

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        @gghardrok

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      girls with sleeve tats are like announcing to the world they should be pumped one day then dumped the next and never married

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Hire this girl for sex in every conceivable position. Then disappear with the remaining funds.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Heh, looks like an ex of mine. Zero life skills and basically needed to be babysat but still had a very high opinion of herself.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      My jungle fever has risen

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    RETREAT UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  11. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >budget is bigger than potential reward
    Pocket 50 billion immediately, use the remaining 10 to shore up local support, while bringing artillery and tanks out of storage. If I succeed by some miracle, my reward is 100bln. If not, I flee at the firdt sign of trouble with 50

  12. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Literally hire North Koreans for infantry. And under threat of gulag/polonium tea, force tactical bombers to fly nearly suicidal missions to middle of Ukraine to drop FAB-500s on Dnieper River bridges

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      A bunch of destroyed bridges and hundreds of thousands of shelled morons, Brilliant.

  13. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I actually nuke coast of the river that divides Ukraine threaten NATO and US and the entire world with nuclear annihilation, unironically. Ukraine will give its eastern territories or we all die.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The entire world turns on you, even your staunchest of allies. Your country implodes within a month. You're strung up and gutted in the street. Critical mission failure.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        What are you talking about. My goal was to keep the eastern territories and cash the USD check. Whatever happens to Russia is none of my business, I was just doing a job and not Russian.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >hold on to Kherson, Crimea, and Dontesk for 1 year
          >no reading comprehension
          >not Russian
          Are you sure you're not Russian?

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >budget: 60 billion USD
    >reward: 50 million USD
    What a strange idea.
    I'd instantly pocket 10 billion, that's just the finder's fee.
    I'd then spend the rest of it on literally coating all of Kherson, Crimea, Dontesk and all of the rest of the Russian-held territory with barbed wire.
    Literally fucking head-to-toe cover the entire field in barbed wire.
    It's fucking genius. No one can get past barbed wire that thick.

  15. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Here is my plan. I gather a bunch of nuclear waste, load it into a air bomb, detonate it over East Ukraine. East Ukraine becomes Chernobyl with the Ukranian unable to take it. We still have it have for 1 year. I get my money.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >it's feasible
      Fuck

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I firmly believe ukies have dirty bombs, the got lots of reactors.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Lateral thinking, I dig it.

  16. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    AliExpress shopping spree
    1. holosuns for all
    2. as many drones as we can get
    3. maybe some north korea infantry in exchange for oil? think about it Kim your commandos need recent combat experience
    4. take pallets and forklifts from private industry and start using in warehouses
    5. buy more modern trucks
    6. try to train more volunteers, actually try to stop them from being raped and hazed

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >try to train more volunteers, actually try to stop them from being raped and hazed
      Nobody will volunteer then

  17. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Get secret line Ukraine. Offer them 59 billion in exchange for my asylum and keeping the other $1b. Leave Russia.

  18. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I guess you slowly bail on the LPR and try and turn the Dontesk metropolitan area into a fortress and hope Ukraine gets too confident and just rushes in like it’s 2014.

    Dump all of the forces freed up by ditching LPR into trying to push across Kherson into Mykolaiv. Cross your fingers the ukies don’t push south from zap.

    To be honest the money doesn’t matter. Russia can only buy garbage right now. Zero of their allies will be willing to help them on the ground. Mobilization is really the only thing that will move the needle for Russia.

  19. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    me and Shoigu to take the day off and we go back to his weeb house to soak in the sauna and paint nature landscapes together

  20. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I refurbish and launch the nukes and the jets.

  21. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >steal $40 billion for myself and my friends
    >allocate $10 billion for contractors who I use to buy their loyalty
    >remaining $10 billion goes to the lowest bidders to buy equipment for the soldiers
    I actually don't give a shit about winning, I'm Russian. I just exist solely to rob my people.

  22. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Start dropping thermobaric FOABs on everything. Hit Kiev every day with one, even after it's already a wasteland, just because.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      and how exactly are you going to be dropping them?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Tu-160 supported by ungodly amounts of chaff and EW.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I'm sorry Sir, all Tu-160s were interdicted at the Belogorod border. The mission is a failure.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            By the Ghost of Kiev?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      How many FOABs do they have? I imagine not many, just use tactical mini nukes, the soviets probably made hundreds.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You don't want to pollute the area you intend to take probably.

  23. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Buy new defensive equipment from Russian manufacturers, get 20% kickback for the orders. Conscript everyone in the dombass that is older than 14 and younger than 65, after 3 weeks training and than send them to dig trenches.
    At this point just build tons of WW1 style trenches and spam anti tank mines.
    The Dombabwe Cannon fodder spam should give me enough time to find a way to fuck off and launder the 12 billion dollars i got from the kickbacks.
    Plus they might actually work in holding everything for one year if i use Russians as commissars in case they retreat.
    Also since i won't declare the losses of Dombabwe soldiers on the record the high command will like that the number of Russian dead stays very low.
    Keep up the propaganda that the Ukrainians will torture, kill and castrate any of the Dombabwe traitors so they don't surrender so easily.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Buy new defensive equipment from Russian manufacturers

      they don't have the capacity for domestic production of arms and their imports are under embargo, why do you think they refuse to employ any PGM made in the past two decades?

  24. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    what's the chances shoigu is alive this time of the year next year?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      pretty good
      killing him would be admission of defeat basically

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        No no, it's Ukrainan special forces that take him out with a car bomb.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Why kill someone who is incompetent? Just send him some quality oak, the smell will distract him for at least 2 days.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The wood spirits protect him. Shoigu will be one of the leaders of post-nuclear civil war Russia. The Tuvan Khaganate will rise.

  25. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Buy whatever equipment I can get kickbacks from
    Skim 10% of the budget directly off the top
    Disappear

  26. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    50 million dollars AND your entire wood collection. All of it. No exceptions.

  27. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Money isn’t going to do much because the main problem is human resources not gear. Also there’s nowhere to buy gear; not even China is selling them truck engines anymore, forget military stuff. I could entice white Slavs from the western districts with high pay but I doubt there’s enough bodies to make a large difference.

    That 60 billion needed to be spent years BEFORE the war started.

  28. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I immediately use the funds to recruit mercenaries to round up all non disillusioned willing troops to turn around and flow forth with the ukrainians torwards moscow and the kremlin we will torture putin in the most inhumane way's possible prolonging his suffering indefinitely.. vladimir lenin's tomb will be turned into a public toilet that joseph stalin's remains will be thrown into, in the response of all of the innocent peope who have died because of communism

  29. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I embezzle the 60 billion dollars and live on a yacht in cyprus.

  30. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I feel that pocketing the money and just turning him over to Ukraine would actually be more likely to save his life from suicide via defenestration

  31. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >How do you handle it?
    Withdraw from all non-Crimean Ukrianian territory, hang Putin in Red Square, and declare a unilateral shitshow while issuing an apology at the UN and requesting the removal of sanctions. There is no saving this shitshow so such a show of contrition is the onlg chance of them keeping something which still preventing a complete economic collapse of Russia.

  32. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    manufacture a video of a Ukrainian destroying a Koran and bride islamic terrorists to declare a jihad and help transport them to ukraine

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Didn't they already do this to rile up the chechens? Also I'm pretty sure Azov already did something of that nature but then again I don't really keep up with this crap anymore.

  33. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Convince Putin to declare war because I need 600,000 to 750,000 troops. Have 200,000 of those troops invade from Belarus to secure Ukraine’s western border. Force Belarus to supply 75,000 to 100,000 troops. Offer Africans, Arabs, and other races that no on cares about $4,000 to come to Ukraine to “guard bases and supply lines”. Hopefully I can get 50,000 of them to join. In reality they’re only getting $1,000 and I’m going to confiscate their phones, passports, and other important items all while RT and Sputnik call this “fake westoid news, great and kindly Poccия would never do that”. I’m going to force them to zerg rush Ukrainian positions, and the families of the dead aren’t getting paid because fuck them. Threaten Kadyrov with assassination and flattening Grozny unless he sends every able-bodied Chechen male to the front lines. Force Maduro to invade Guyana to distract the US. US invades Venezuela and can’t send as much shit to Ukraine. Russia loses a South American ally, but Ukraine is for more important. And we’ll take it from there.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Force Maduro to invade Guyana to distract the US. US invades Venezuela and can’t send as much shit to Ukraine.
      Honestly the French would probably get involved at that point too. And I don't Francce would need US help to beat Venezuela outside of maybe doing them a solid with air and sea transport.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Just to clarify, I was talking about Guyana not French Guinea since Venezuela claims most of the country.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >French Guinea
          French Guinea was in Africa and there is no such thing anymore. It's French Guyana.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Good reply. I was wondering if anyone would post actually wanting to win the challenge at all costs, as opposed to boring repetitive "fuck Russia" replies. I mean, yeah fuck Russia, but goddamn eurobros, lighten up and show some creativity.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Fuck Russia but fuck Cuckraine even harder.

        lol, vatniks are so lost that they come to PrepHole asking advice. lmao

        At least russians are not lost enough to use a parody of both, Russian and English instead of a valid language.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Furfag > Russian
          simple as.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >be russian
          >get shot by furfag
          i almost feel pity for them

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          This has to be fake, why does he have a bolt action?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          https://i.imgur.com/k9WMNSh.gif

          Furfag > Russian
          simple as.

          >be russian
          >get shot by furfag
          i almost feel pity for them

          I can see future war scene dominated by furries.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Top one didn't fit

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I honestly had more to say but I failed the captcha and lost all my progress

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >onvince Putin to declare war because I need 600,000 to 750,000 troops.
      No, gay, you need equipment and resources to feed, dress and house those troops. Your cunning plan ends up with a human wave of naked, starved gopniks running scared around the red forest. Dumb cunt. Also (

      https://i.imgur.com/jdBhIGy.jpg

      Good reply. I was wondering if anyone would post actually wanting to win the challenge at all costs, as opposed to boring repetitive "fuck Russia" replies. I mean, yeah fuck Russia, but goddamn eurobros, lighten up and show some creativity.

      ) stop replying to yourself, you fucking clown.

  34. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Buy enough military support to coup d'etat and take the Kremlin. Pull out of Ukraine. Give Shoigu a cut and let him rule an independent Greater Tuvan Republic. Carve up the Russia Federation for income to make the country easier to manage - sell Vladivostok, etc to China, sell the Kurils and Sakhalin to Japan.

  35. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Abide by Russian tradition, embezzle half the funds, then lose, defect and claim my 30 billion.

  36. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    non-Reddit answer:
    >withdraw all ground forces to regroup and resupply
    >announce a total energy embargo against any country that continues to provide further support to Ukraine, effectively immediately
    >(this includes prohibiting the re-selling of Russian gas to the EU by third parties like India and Saudi Arabia)
    >target energy, water, and food infrastructure in Ukraine
    >also target government buildings/elected officials for strikes
    >negotiate an agreement with China, similar to the relationship the US and UK had in WWII: technology transfers in exchange for cheap military hardware
    >obtain J-20s from china
    >use stealth aircraft to perform SEAD and achieve air air superiority over Ukraine
    >after superiority, send in the strategic bombers and totally destroy any remaining armed resistance
    >re-deploy ground forces to police newly annexed Ukrainian territory

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      China would not give tech transfer to Russia on the J-20. The time it would take before some Russian engineer or officer sold the data to the CIA for 50 million dollars would be measured in hours.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Other way around: Russia does tech transfer to China in exchange for equipment.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          China just steals any tech they want from Russia now as is.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Not necessarily. They have some things like advanced metallurgy that China hasn't been able to copy yet.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >announce a total energy embargo against any country that continues to provide further support to Ukraine, effectively immediately
      >(this includes prohibiting the re-selling of Russian gas to the EU by third parties like India and Saudi Arabia)
      This won't work though. Gas doesn't get resold anyway and Russia already shut nordstream for """maintenance""". EU is already at like 80% gas reserves and building LNG as fast as they can. They will experience economic pain but that's it and by this time next year they'll be fully diversified. Oil is fungible so no help there. America gives zero fucks about any of this it can produce all the oil and gas it needs. Nobody else actually matters.

      Though some of this might get America to give Ukraine ATACMS and let them use it directly against Russian territory.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        The EU is still running on Russian gas exports, only now more of it is resold from other countries. Nothing really changed about where they get their energy.
        >Though some of this might get America to give Ukraine ATACMS and let them use it directly against Russian territory.
        Then if I were Shoigu I would detonate a tactical nuke on the Russia-Ukraine border in a sparsely populated area. It's not a direct threat to anybody else, but it would make everyone else fuck right off.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >The EU is still running on Russian gas exports, only now more of it is resold from other countries
          thats a complete fabrication tho

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            The United States is buying gas from Russia and selling it to the EU.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              That's not how pipelines work. Russia's combined LNG export capacity is like a third of Nordstream's capacity.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                If we can run the internet through pipes under the ocean you think we couldn't do the same with LNG?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >the only moron who actually thinks the internet is a series of tubes.
                Smelly, dumb, frogposter scum.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Could a massive undersea America to Europe LNG pipeline be built? Maybe. You'd need some serious engineering around the mid Atlantic riff. Would it help Russia? lol no retard it would make Russia irrelevant.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Lmao what? We make our own petroleum products here, retard. I'm fact this whole natural gas situation is one reason I wish Trump had won. We set a new record for petro exports under Trump and he was trying to get Poland to install a NG offloading station

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >We make our own petroleum products here, retard.
                Just lol. You blokes literally invaded Afghanistan because you didn't have enough oil and natural gas.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Are you actually retarded?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >American calling anybody else retarded
                Again, just lol.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Alright I'll admit I DID take what should have been obvious bait. That's definitely on me.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Afghanistan
                >oil and gas

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Your brain must be smooth, smoothest there is.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Except it's not. Prove me wrong.
            >protip: you can't

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >detonating a nuke would "make everyone else fuck right off"
          lol, lmao even

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Nobody is going to risk MAD over a tactical nuke partially in Russian territory that didn't kill anyone.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              The only one risking MAD is Russia if they set a nuke off anywhere near the Russian/Ukraine border. Even if nobody dies, your basically telling the world that your actually stupid enough to use a nuke in a manner that isn't defensive in nature. You're right, it would scare Ukraine and the west, as well as the rest of the world. The entire world would come down on Russia overnight. It's the worst thing Russia could do.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Retards like yourself don't understand that the moment that a nuclear weapon is detonated in anger, much less in response to a failed war of aggression, not a defensive war for the survival of your nation, you have to be put down like the mad dog you are to make it perfectly clear to the rest of the world that nuclear warfare is not acceptable or normalized. If the US, China, India, Pakistan, and various EU nuclear powers do not immediately launch a counterforce first strike against you and instead capitulate to your demands, every attempt at nuclear non-proliferation goes out the window. Literally every country will be racing to build their own nuclear weapons because that is the only defensive measure that you can take, which the current nuclear powers don't want because it both robs them of their superior standing and dramatically increases the risk of nuclear terrorism or warfare. There is no situation where using a nuclear weapon in the war in Ukraine would ever end up with anything less then Russia instantly getting glassed unless they've managed to lose so hard that Ukraine is shelling the Kremlin.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                The true retards are the ones thinking the world will risk nuclear annihilation for Okraina.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                only one way to find out for sure, moron

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >I am illiterate

                You didn't have to say it twice by revealing yourself to be a vatnik.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Oikraina
                Gets my morale every time

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >The EU is still running on Russian gas exports, only now more of it is resold from other countries
          This is literally not how NG works you fucking retard. LNG conversion is incredibly expensive and non-trivial even for low volume and without it you either have a pipeline or you have nothing. You've exposed yourself completely, well except then you go even farther:
          >Then if I were Shoigu I would detonate a tactical nuke on the Russia-Ukraine border in a sparsely populated area. It's not a direct threat to anybody else, but it would make everyone else fuck right off.
          lol. Any offensive use of nuclear weapons is a direct threat to everybody else and everybody knows it. Even in the better scenarios nearly every single gaming out of it results in escalation to strategic exchange. Allowing anyone to use nukes offensively is completely unacceptable to everyone else, it spirals unstoppably right away. About the BEST case scenario for that for Russia would be that China/India manages to negotiate NATO doesn't directly stomp them or give UA free reign in exchange for China and India joining the full embargo, for real.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >announce a total energy embargo against any country that continues to provide further support to Ukraine, effectively immediately
      >(this includes prohibiting the re-selling of Russian gas to the EU by third parties like India and Saudi Arabia)
      congratulation,
      snowgeria now has economy that rivals undiscovered tribes in the amazon rainforest.

      they can't produce tech
      they can't manufacture anything but the most basic of products
      they're horribly uneducated and imporvished
      their only source of income is selling natural resources to countries who have at least a resemblance of industry.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >snowgeria
        Did you know Poland just sealed a deal with regular Nigeria for gas?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          How are they gonna ship it? By literal ship?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Either that or via pipelines

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Zeppelin.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >How are they gonna ship it? By literal ship?
            what are LNG terminals?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      J-20s from china
      >stealth
      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

  37. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would launch a large scale investigation into corruption in the military. Anybody, from a general to a private, that is found to be stealing military equipment and selling it would be immediately executed on the stop.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Congratulations, you just executed 95% of the Russian military.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Your search would eventually lead you into executing Ukrainian military as well, before you realise that that is an international issue.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Ukrainian military
        Now anon I would I want to help the enemy?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      this would very swiftly lead to you being removed from your post by Shoigu himself, as you'd be stepping on the toes of the entire russian military, including him.

  38. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    lol, vatniks are so lost that they come to PrepHole asking advice. lmao

  39. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Buy half an F-35 and rule the airways

  40. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Free Tasty & That’s It for any cargo 200 family
    Also unlimited pontoon ferry special for life
    And a Peg for a leg in case of injury sorry Russia doesn’t have advanced prosthetics

  41. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I freeze the border the best I can: minefields, artillery posted everywhere, SAMs. If I have something that can do high altitude bombing, just bomber harris and erase a city from the map to make sure the message' through.

    After that, well beyond HIMAR distance, I try and reorganize whatever's left of the armed forces into cohesive units that have actually more technical capability than just being thugs forced to fight at gunpoint. Most likely purge officers stalin style.

    Eventually I'll just start advancing city by city. Even without mobilization ukrs can't beat me in manpower and artillery production.

    only problem is the ammo depot problem, which I don't know how to handle since I'm not a logistics professional - but surely there's a way.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >can't beat me in manpower
      faulty premise, Ukraine has an advantage in manpower.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Even without mobilization ukrs can't beat me in manpower
      Anon...

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah killing officers worked out super well for Stalin you fuckin mook

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      So your plan is to leave the front line with skeleton crew, who will easily give way to attacking troops. Then just "reorganize" somehow into good fighting units with greater technical capability (please explain how).

      Next you... 'just advance dude, lol'. City by city. As if that wasn't what the russians already were doing.

      Also, you dont realize that the russians have worse manpower than the ukies and you admit to not knowing anything bout logistics.
      Why did you even post this?

  42. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Shoot myself right in front of his eyes when he tells me about it. Should get the message across.

  43. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Immediately put 1 billion dollar bounty on Putin's head.
    >Sneakily offer Ukraine ceasefire terms where the Russian army withdraws to the pre-February 24th borders except for in Kherson, Crimea, and Donetsk, which will be demilitarized until a final peace treaty is signed.
    >To alleviate Ukrainian suHispanicion, I suggest UN peacekeepers occupy those areas, but (and this is important) they will be administered by the current Russian occupational governments while the peace talks are still ongoing.
    >Open negotiations by immediately recognizing Ukraine's pre-2014 borders, stating in writing that they can join the EU and NATO without Russian interference, agreeing to extradite all war criminals to the Hague, and offering them 59 billion dollars of reconstruction money on the sole condition that the treaty isn't signed for 366 days.
    >If they say no, threaten to give the now suicidally-depressed Girkin the nuclear launch codes.
    >Get Shoigu to agree that this actually meets the terms and conditions by offering to split the reward money with him 50/50.
    >Use my Nobel Prize and $25 million to get bitches.
    >Be known to history as a Chaotic Good version of Henry Kissinger.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Anon if you were within a thousand miles of good you wouldn't be any version of kissinger.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        An anti-paladin is just another type of paladin.

  44. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >How do you handle it?
    Turn traitor and flip the territory back to Ukraine. Didn't say I had to hold the territory as Russian.

  45. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Best hope is to try and sign away sovereignty to china on condition of serious assistance in ukraine.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      of course second condition is Shoigu, Putin + all russian higher ups get nice comfy retirements with armed guards.

  46. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would hire someone else to fix the situation in Ukraine.

    Budget: 50 billion USD

  47. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Raze kreml to the ground and establish new government and join nato and EU.
    Bam, your flag is also flying in all the cities and you are now on way of becoming one of the most powerful economies in the world.

  48. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I lease Kherson, Crimea, and Donetsk from Ukraine for 1 year

  49. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >commit forces to useless propaganda victories
    >embezzle as much money as possible
    >move to Switzerland and write memoirs embellishing my victories and portraying myself as a noble man on simply on the wrong side of the war
    >spend the rest of my days on news shows giving my outdated and misinformed opinions on warfare and geopolitics before dying from a strange case of radiation poisoning

  50. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >retreat from Ukraine
    >build giant wood versions of Ukrainian cities in Siberia
    >film our brave troops taking these cities
    >replace every map and globe inside the Kremlin with ones showing Ukraine as Russian

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      smart

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >build giant wood versions of Ukrainian cities
      >wood
      A man after Shoigu's heart.

  51. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Nice try Ivan. You cant come to PrepHole everytime to help you with your homework!

  52. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would negotiate. I'm sure I could get something good out of giving Moscow to the Ukrainians.

  53. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'm sure he had 100 million budget to start with

  54. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Ruskies shouldve payed ukranian goverment for Luhansk and Donetz regions to have some kind of autonomy, they couldve give ukranian gas for thousands of years or some shit, avoiding the war.

  55. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Manpower: what remains of the Russian forces

    1) Withdraw from Ukraine
    2) Attack Kremlin
    3) Take the power
    4) 20 Years of liberal reforms in the army and economy.
    5) Did we become richer than the EU?
    5.1) Yes - persuade Ukrainians to join us for improving living standards. Goal achieved.
    6) 5 more Years of army reformation and preparing for the invasion
    7) SO 2.0 considering the upgrade.

  56. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Go to CIA and tell them give me 100 million dollars and one year to relocate all Russian troops from every part of the country for an all-in attack. Deploy troops and ammo depots in HIMARS range and send coordinates to CIA. Hijack military plane to Turkey right before the purge.

  57. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    its not doable with the technology gap that exists and the losses are too high at this point
    >enemy artillery outranges mine by tens of kilometers, its much more accurate too
    >the enemy has almost perfect intelligence through satellites, drones, partisans hiding in my rear lines
    >i cant use my aviation because i have no long range munitions, every mission is a one way trip due to superior western antiair systems
    >enemy can use his aviation and plink my radar AA with impunity
    >only troops i have left are poorly trained 60yr olds
    >most of my top tier hardware is gone and im down to stuff built in the 60s
    >cant rebuild any of the good stuff cause my country is embargo'd to shit and the west is not trading with me
    >things at home are bound to turn really bad soon with inflation and economy going down the shitter
    >enemy is playing with infinite resources as everyone in the west is willing to front the costs of the war just to see me lose

    it would take decades of nation building to fix this

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This seems logical.
      A challenge I ask of you is how would you turn Russia around domestically and on the world stage?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        it would take decades of nation building.
        the russian economy right now is based on the export of raw materials like gas and cereal and import of semi-finished products with almost nothing inbetween.
        for it to become able to self-source all these high-tech high quality products it would need a massive effort in building industries capable of producing everything from microprocessors to thermal cameras to whatever is required to assemble precision guided munitions.
        i'd probably look at what japan, south korea and china did with their respective countries after the wars (and china after the 80s/90s).
        it would probably also require a radical change in society, dismantling corruption, reforming the armed forces so that soldiers arent scared of their peers shooting them cause they took hazing too far, tackling alcoholism and widespread poverty.

        the first step would be to just kill/remove putin and all his loyal aides to show the world and themselves that there's at least a concrete desire for change, then reopen to trade with the world and attract foreign investments.

  58. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    bail his ass out? sex change operation in bangkok. begin a new life as a chud prostitute.

  59. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'd probably drop every single Russian asset into Ukraine, since apparently a large portion of Russian equipment is being held back in case of NATO intervention. The problem is that if NATO decides to go for it, no conventional force in Russia will be able to fight them off. Their best bet is an all-in at this point.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      NATO hasn't intervened thus far, unless russia decides to do something extremely stupid like nuking ukraine they will probably just keep supplying hardware and go on with sanctions and nothing else.
      and if NATO does decide to invade then the use of nukes to defend home soil would be justified, if invasion happens russia is dead either way so might as well give a bloody nose to the invader before they go extinct.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I don't understand the idea to use nukes in the defense of Russia. It's either losing national sovereignty after a protracted defensive war, or certain nuclear annihilation turning the entire country into a desert.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          they wont use nukes because as you said it makes no sense, they win nothing and would lose everything
          the noook talks are mostly people who know nothing about war and geopolitics or people who want to scare others

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Because your mindset is different. You say losing national sovereignty, but they consider it an existential threat not to the government, but the nation.

  60. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I embezzle 5.5 billion dollars and buy some stone age wood with the remaining 500 million and present it to Shoigu as a present.

  61. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Build cheap ass wood tanks and kalibrs.
    Those will buy some time,while having no damage potential.
    Pocket the rest.
    Flee.

    After the Ukraine win, I'll get medal for disrupting Russian efforts.

  62. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I thank Mr. Shoig for his time, decline his offer and tell him that the task is impossible.

  63. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I act as a mole into the Kremlin and get rewarded with the dictatorship of Russia when they lose. I use it to kill ethnic Russians and Chechens (because fuck durkas) in the millions.

  64. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >No mobilization
    Actually almost impossible, right now Russia's biggest problem is manpower. Even quadrupling the current active Russian troops in Ukraine wouldn't completely fix its manpower issues and this isn't even getting into actually being able to rotate troops.

  65. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    uhhh re invade in the north

  66. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    50 mirrion dorra?

    THE DORRA IS A WORTHLESS PIECE OF TOILET PAPER!!

  67. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would tell him to go all in on one final assault with everything along a wide front including poland and the baltic
    If they don't make it at least as far as paris launch the nukes.

  68. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    If You were to take the challenge seriously, use the money to replace the Russian officer corps. Fire everyone whose performance has been subpar (so, almost everyone) and fill the roles in with kadets and through field promotions. It would be a disaster, but the officers Russia has are actively undermining the ear effort. They are worse than worse than useless. Additionally, bring all available artillery out of storage and set up defensive lines deep in occupied territory. Start sending conscripts into the fight again, say Putin "doesn't know" or whatever, as well as offering even more enticing terms to sign contracts. Ramp up Wagner's prison sweep, then also start recruiting foreign "volunteers" from "friendly" countries. Try to get my hands on former NATO officers and enlisted for training and organization.

    I still think it would fail. The officer purge woukd be a huge gamble, of course, and a guaranteed unpopukar move on the home front.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      How would you train the new officer's corps?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        The ones in school might be ttained well enough, having not gome through the corruption ass-kissing game. Otherwise, the americans I've managed to buy could possibly teach some doctrine and specific best practices

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >the americans I've managed to buy
          OOOOHHHHH! Way down south in the land of sunflowers!

  69. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >How do you handle it?
    I immediately dispatch an envoy to Mongolia, to seek assistance from the Horde in exchange for Russia becoming a tributary state (with 20 billion USD as initial tribute). Soon Ukraine would be overwhelmed by roving bands of horse archers and motorcycle gunners.

  70. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Create plans to sell off old weapons and tanks. Assemble the best engineers to develop proper atgm countermeasures to be fitted on new production tanks. Armor units will be trained to work with infantry. Pull back troops to captured areas and form defensive lines to buy time. New Infantry units will be reorganized in a way similiar to western millitaries. These will be replacing troops already at the front. Pocket 60 billion plus the money from sold old stock. Fake my death and flee the country. hide portions of the money in offshore bank accounts. Win.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Assemble the best engineers
      So none that are to be found in Russia, then?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        The ones who paid to be part of the team

  71. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    > mfw OP is probably an actual Russian officer trying to pull genuune advice from a joke questiin on PrepHole because he is so bad at his job

  72. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Negotiate a peace along the lines of the pseudo countries Russia claimed to be defending. They largely support Russia anyway and were pseudo-countries even before this with a lot of self-governance. Use them as a DMZ between Russia and Ukraine/Nato and allow citizens in that region to either leave for Ukraine, Russia, or stay. Russia gives up any other land they captured, and can save face because at the start they technically said they were doing it in defense of this region, they can claim to their citizens they successfully did enough damage that Ukraine won't invade those areas. Ukraine can say they successfully fended off Russia's invasion. Both sides can show it as a victory to their people.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This is so close to being a good idea. There's just some small thing that needs to be tweaked but I can't put my finger on it

  73. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >build 10 scud storms
    >activate scud storms
    >???????????
    >now you see me, now you're dead

  74. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Back in April I could have given you a solution, but right now there's literally nothing in my mind that could help the situation

  75. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >You will get 50 million dollars if you can pull it off.
    >Budget: 60 billion USD

    This is Russia we're talking about. I spend 10 bil, steal 50 bil, then blame the US for my failure.

  76. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Steal as much as I can and put the rest of the money into tank purchases, I'm sure Ukraine is totally out of ATGMs by now.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      judging from some videos, they are at least wasting a bunch of AT4s.

  77. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    this board is now completely homosexual reddit tier
    how could this happen?

  78. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    How could Russia realistically hold Kherson?
    Considering that their supply lines get constantly harassed while having no reliable counters against HIMARS.
    >No air superiority+proper SEAD to then bomb long range artillery
    >No accurate long range artillery for counter artillery missions
    >No reliable way to deploy SOF and fuck with enemy artillery positions

    Kherson seems absolutely doomed. Crimea and Donetsk could actually be salvaged with some mastermind strategy. Still there is no way to salvage Kherson in a military manner that excludes nukes and general mobilization.

  79. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Disable Russia's entire nuclear arsenal and invite NATO to invade.

  80. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >60 billion
    Isn't Ukraine getting trillions collectively?
    I would launder it and run

  81. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would buy 20m worth of TORs and sell it to Ukraine and escape with my life to the West with 10m

    fuck the 50m the Russians dont even pay their soldiers basic salary

  82. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    he should order a Hoover Max Extract 60 Pressure Pro

  83. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Retards here commenting "just buy more tanks and planes", from who? Soviet factories already work at 150% capacity with infinite budget, and no one important will sell Russia any equipment. 2 countries that can sell equipment, already did and that's powerful giants like NK and Iran. IRL is not C&C where you can order 1000 T-14 if you have enough money.

  84. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Basically abandoned the entire Russian navy outside of the sub force, sell all of the main ships for scrap metal, put the money saved into drone technologies, abandoned Kherson, blow up every bridge across the din river, use spec ops for cross border raids from Belarus and trannista to tie up Ukrainian forces, allow the use of North Korean infantry use the 100k nork infantry to try another bum rush towards Kharkiv then use the Chechen cannon fodder to launch a smaller offensive in Kiev again to distract them, surround Kharkiv bypass it, burn every farm field you come across then send drones into western Ukraine to drop incendiary bombs on wheat fields, sub attacks on all ships from Odesa, this will cause a global food shortage and hurt western funding because they will do what ever it takes to keep africa fed this will also cause unrest in the Middle East tying up more western resources, use Iranian backed proxy’s in Yemen to hit oil infrastructure in Saudi again creating global oil crisis, drop leaflets over random cities in Ukraine telling them there will be carpet bombing on a random day causing mass panic and jamming road ways but don’t actually bomb them, oh and don’t fuck with Ukrainian pows give them good food and put them up in a brothel with internet to send pictures back home also use the 60 billion to pay people to surrender also buy optics and NV gear then shoot the first fucker that sells it on eBay

  85. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would just invest in artillery and trenches.
    Like this i would make the enemy tire, is not pleasant to hear shells all the time.

  86. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    look for commanders that show promise and aren't ass kissers
    purge the entire upper military echelon
    start recruiting moar soldiers and boost whatever morale remaining troops have
    proper supply management
    plunder the land
    and most important of all take this fucking war seriously and not waste human lives like these old retards are doing
    fucking idiots wasting resources and destroying any hope for support in the country
    you had kiev encircled yet you fucking bail?
    then you just play quiet?
    fucking coward where is your fucking resolve?
    yeah and most important of all since i lead the fucking country lead the army itself and boost its fucking morale

  87. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >bail his ass out and salvage the Ukranian situation.
    having Putin shot and blame it all on him

  88. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    if my budget is 60 bn to earn 50 million, then i steal the 60 billion

  89. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I take 50 billion, short roubles, put a 1 billion dollar bounty on Putin, take the remaining 9 billion and back to shitposting.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I spend 30 billion on building my weeaboo mansion of my dreams right next to Shoigu's, except mine is even bigger and better

  90. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    organize a coup and find a way to flee the country in the chaos. it has better chances of survival than whatever the fuck is happening now.

  91. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Detonate 7 nukes on Russian border near Ukraine. That will force peace. And then spend all money on external partisan and terrorists organization.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >detonate nukes on Russian territory
      I like this plan

  92. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I pocket the money while Shoigu mysteriously falls to his death from a hospital window

  93. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous.

    Immediately ally with Zelenskyy, turn around.
    Buy as much shit as I can. Drones, arty, AA, APC's, LAV's. Request nuclear protection from NATO and the like.
    Aid in the reclamation of Crimea for Ukraine, in exchange for assistance in taking either Kaliningrad, or the Rostov, Krasnodar Krai and Adygea Oblasts.
    Spend the next several years and any leftover cash in my budget making a comfy and healthy, if not the absolute wealthiest, country, with an industry based around fishing exports, farming, wines, tourism, and being a trade lane between Georgia, the middle east, and places like Ukraine.
    Reserve myself enough (~5M) to invest in a couple good industries for income, build a nice house on the seaside, get myself a boat of my own (not a yacht, a launch, and not a super one), and relax.

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