>The letters of last resort are four identically-worded handwritten letters from the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom to the commanding officers of the four British ballistic missile submarines.
>They contain orders on what action to take if an enemy nuclear strike has destroyed the British government
You are the commanding officer of one of these submarines. After a series of checks it has been determined that the letter should be opened. It has been reported that the prime minister is given four options when writing the letter:
>put yourself under the command of the US, if it is still there
>go to australia
>retaliate
>use your own judgement
What does your letter say commander?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Letters_of_last_resort
Be a good chap and send your birds to the Jerries, for old times' sake.
>don't ally with australia, just go there
Why is this so funny?
>place the submarine under an allied country's command, if possible. The documentary mentions Australia and the United States.
It's not actually written like that, but if it were, I assume it's because Australia would have large chunks of it un-nuked. Or perhaps not touched at all, seeing as it does not have a nuclear arsenal of its own.
>The Guardian reported in 2016 that the options are said to include: "Put yourself under the command of the US, if it is still there", "Go to Australia"
Juxtaposed with the part about the US it kind of seemed like it, but I agree thats probably not the intent or even what the actual letters say.
>announce 'I am under US authority now.'
>refuse to elaborate
>leave (for Australia)
I feel like Pine Gap and similar facilities would be targets in a nuclear exchange.
>I feel like Pine Gap and similar facilities would be targets in a nuclear exchange.
Lucky for us then that Pine Gap is quite literally in the middle of nowhere and is about as remote as an intelligence facility can get without being in Greenland, Antarctica, or not on this planet.
Nukes are targeted with military efficacy in mind, not "point our nukes at their nukes".
t. Virginius Nopussybottomsworth VII, nuclear warfare expert and reputed armchair generallisimo.
>use your own judgement
what the fuck m8 that's no kind of order at all
The captain of a nuke sub is probably more informed as to whats a good option than the average PM anyway
>use your own judgement
if the letter of last resort is being read we are by definition in the immediate post-apocolypse, so hoist the jolly roger and begin nuclear blackmail for personal gain, every crew member gets a share
Choose whatever course of action is calculated to kill as many enemy civilians as possible, with the lowest chance of ever recovering. Bonus points if it causes a slower, more painful genocide.
Nuke Germany so Europe has a chance of rebuilding itself.
Considering no one else knows about the content of the letter and no one will ever double check, couldn't the commander lie about its content?
Well obviously but it’s assumed they are complete wankers
Aren’t lel
>Well obviously but it’s assumed they are complete wankers
is just "whatever you do, make it funny"
I mean if it was humanities last act, going out on a joke would be perfect
>humanities last act is british humor
Of coursh.
>own judgement
Glass straya it is then.
>glass Australia
>nothing changes
>let's try on these nuclear apocalypse goggles
>it's an improvement
>What does your letter say commander?
A nation that can't maintain a chain of command in the event of a nuclear war shouldn't have nuclear weapons to begin with, set the crew into life boats and scuttle the ship in the deepest water possible.
>dumping nukes into the ocean
Christ I’m glad the most you’ll probably be commanding is a gas station with that IQ
I stage a mutiny against this captain and launch all our weapons at Three Gorges Dam. Then I fire him out of a torpedo tube.
Not sure you can aim those missiles; you just get code groups for preplanned targets.
>handwritten
>2022 handwriting
Imagine opening one of these and it's a combination of an incomprehensible doctor's note and something an 8 year old wrote.
Or, better yet, nobody on the sub can read the PM's cursive.
> might as well be moon runes
Nuke Israel
It took too many posts for k to give this, the correct answer.
>"N"
Send all my nukes to the British government just to make sure the job was finished
Ruthenia Delenda Est
With a shaky hand, you grasp the envelope.
You still can't believe this day has finally happened. Were there to be any historians left in future able to look back upon this moment with the benefit of hindsight, the outcome would have been obvious. The final straw had come once the complete blockade of all banan towards the former Russian Federation had proven a pontoon bridge too far. The monkey finally snapped, armafag's apeageddon was finally upon us all. Still, you knew your duty as Captain of the HMS Vengeance. Taking a quick calming breath, you will your hands to cease shaking just long enough to slit the envelope open. Inside you found the finest of parchment every produced in her Majesty's great kingdom, open which was written in immaculate flowing calligraphy were but four words: "morons tongue my anus".
How is the food on a British submarine
Word around the campfire is that one method RN uses to determine if UK still exists is to listen for BBC4.
> if Auntie Beeb isn't broadcasting, country is done
> let the missiles fly!