Here is your pocket knife bro

Here is your pocket knife bro

250 Piece Survival Gear First Aid Kit

LifeStraw Water Filter for Hiking and Preparedness

250 Piece Survival Gear First Aid Kit

  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Nice rage bait/fake news. They're going to produce a version without a blade as a PR stunt. They're not removing the blade from existing versions.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >PR stunt.
      Why make it as a pr stunt? Im sure there's a market for a carry-on version.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        This. As a guide who flies to location and has changeovers and doesn't have time to wait for checked baggage, this is what's needed. Frickin TSA

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          What urgent need for tweezers do you have that it can't wait for check out?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      How could they remove it from existing knives lol? Did you think Victorinox was gonna come to your house and remove the blade from a gimmick knife you bought 20 years ago

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        New productions of existing models you obtuse moron.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          So... a new model? With a new design, newly manufactured?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Yes moron that's what "produce a version without a blade as a pr stunt" means fricking hell

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Dude, wtf. I just checked the one in my nightstand. Its fricking gone. Those swiss mountain goblins stole the blade off my knife while I slept.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        They will keep manufacturing the new models, but also produce a variant without a knife.
        Honestly, I just assumed they already had one.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >They're not removing the blade from existing versions.
      Like I would let some swiss homosexual come into my house and remove the blade from my knife. Come and Take It motherfrickers.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >corkscrew stabbings up 400%, police mystified

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >stabbing with a Swiss army knife
      enjoy the blade closing on your hand
      just hold it in a fist with the awl sticking out between your knuckles

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        They took the blade out, haven't you been paying attention

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        The only ones worth stabbing anyone with have locking blades.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >due to crime wave
      fricking where? they think anything happening 'murica or even UK affects the largest pocket knife manufacturer in the world, located in Switzerland?
      they're just looking to expand and being so dominant they only just now found an opportunity - a BRAND NEW, TSA safe product

      A swiss army knife without a blade is as much use as the swiss army.

      kek

      ....so its not a knife?

      it's the problem of an english language that it has no word for a multitool of the style
      mine does

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      this
      are people aware of how many stabbings are done with screwdrivers?

      Victorinox are swiss homosexuals anyway, as this guy says its only a PR stunt

      Nice rage bait/fake news. They're going to produce a version without a blade as a PR stunt. They're not removing the blade from existing versions.

      , nobody thinks it'll accomplish anything except generate a frickton of clickbait replies and give publicity

      ngl, I still really like the victorinox swiss army knives

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I use the plastic toothpick on my victims. But they have to cooperate or it just keeps bending away.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    A swiss army knife without a blade is as much use as the swiss army.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I can see value in having versions specific to certain tasks that don't generally require a knife, but it still seems stupid because a knife is the most basic, general purpose tool that exists.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >he doesn't take some thread for patching with the awl
      >he's never had a splinter
      >he's never needed to open a can or bottle while out
      >he's can't fathom needing to screw something shut in a pinch while out of doors
      >he doesn't even take a bottle of wine backpacking
      What the heck!!! I carry two because I always have a classic on my keychain (the scissors are handy day to day) and have a spartan in my pack

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The swiss have the most capable army in europe

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    if it's airplane carry without tsaBlack folk stealing it i'd love that.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >corkscrew stabbings up 400%, police mystified

      >On flight to whatever, USA
      >mindin my business sitting at the front of the plane
      >a gaggle of Swedes get up from their seats and rush towards the wienerpit
      >Flight attendants shriek in horror as they’re almost at the door
      >Pull out my trusty TSA approved swiss army not-a-knoife
      >the potential terrorists stop dead in their tracks armed with knives and box cutters that they were easily able to sneak pass the TSA agents
      >I deploy my trusty corkscrew as the first Mohammadian lunges forward with his non-TSA approved weapon
      >dodge his blow and proceed to stab the throat
      >the corkscrew is unable to be pulled out for the panicking paki
      >his flailing body blocks the entrance to the wienerpit
      >Air Marshal pulls out his pistol and proceeds to go absolute Fallujah on the failed hijackers
      >Swiss army knife saves the day

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Ready for darning needle related crime

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    There are not enough words for me to fully express the absolute disdain I feel towards br*tish ~~*people*~~

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    ....so its not a knife?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      it's just a Swiss Army now

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Inb4 re-branding to "Swiss Army Multitool"

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I would buy a knife less swiss army knife because i always carry a dedicated fixed blade anyways, more space for tools is more useful in my case.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Do you have the right license from the king to be posting here, Achmed?

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Great way to create demand & move the old stock quick.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Clever.
      Like when dodge said they were discontinuing the charger just to be like “oh never mind”

      Cheap marketing tricks. 3 months Swiss will say “due to public demand we’ve decided to continue production of the knife variety”

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        they did discontinue the charger and the platform it was based on
        the new car is unrelated to the previous model in every conceivable way. it doesn't even have a v8.

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    what is it with bongs and their shitty stabbings? no other EU country has this problem especially outside big cities and even with immigrants

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >go to america
      >get shot
      >go to UK
      >OIIIIIIIIIIII
      >get stabbed by a fork

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      They thought weapon restrictions would do the job.
      Turns out there is also some socio economy elements at play that increase the factors, and that means society resort to stabbing when shit gets dire.

      I'd image Sweden would also have mass stabbings in the ghetto, if they tightened down gun control to avoid random post Soviet weapons floodiing the entire EU.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      We have an enormous number of foreigners in our cities that really hate us and each other, but don’t have access to guns, so just have to make do with continuing their millennia old conflicts and expressing their total contempt for the natives, who’s taxes pay for them to kill around on the streets all day doing nothing, before working as Deliveroo drivers in the evening, by stabbing everyone for fun and profit.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      turns out that people who want to hurt others will find a way to do it whether they can get a gun or not. people seem to forget that you can cause a lot of damage with pretty much any car and they're everywhere, no need for a weapon

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The UK doesn't have a problem with stabbings outside a few shitty big cities. Nobody ever gets stabbed in some random country village full of rural white people.

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Was told not to bring this thing into work because somebody saw it on my keys. There are vulnerable people around yes, but why would someone ever let them get hold of their keys?

    The demoralisation never ends, but we persist regardless.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Those are strange keys. What do they unlock?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Your heart :^)

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        construction equipment.

        >corkscrew stabbings up 400%, police mystified

        100% a legit euro headline. remember the nahrwal tusk stabbing?

        >go to america
        >get shot
        >go to UK
        >OIIIIIIIIIIII
        >get stabbed by a fork

        the thing the media doesn't tell you is its ethnic on ethnic gang members shooting each other in America and hate crime against white people by immigrants in the UK. I go to chicago for work frequently, one of the deadliest gun violence citites on the planet. All guns are "illegal" there, you can see how much that helps. The key is stay out of the shitto. If we really wanted to lower crime we'd just make murder and stabbing double really serious crimes instead of banning things.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You should have told them to go frick themselves

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    lmao, my drunk friend tried to stab someone with one this new years eve and we had to stop him xD

    the blade in those was useless anyway

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >HURRR I DONT KNOW WHAT A SAND GRINDER AND A WHETSTONE IS

    >HURR GUYS LOOK AT HOW BUSHCRAFT SURVIVAL AND OUTPILLED AT I AM HOW DO I PUT AN EDGE ON METAL THIS ISNT AN ESSENTIAL SKILL RIGHT I CAN JUST GO TO WALMART IF I GET LOST RIGHT

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >WHAT A SAND GRINDER AND A WHETSTONE IS
      >I CAN JUST GO TO WALMART IF I GET LOST RIGHT
      So what's your strawman? That you should carry around a sand grinder in case you're lost? That a pocket knife not coming with a blade is OK because you should be putting it on yourself?

      I haven't seen a post this moronic in years, you've really outdone yourself.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        i can out do that
        just you watch
        i will start foaming at the mouth and jack off and scream in the middle of a forest at 3am

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >he goes out into the wilderness without a belt sander

  15. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >gb ''''news''
    >twitter screencap
    yeah frick yourself op you newfriend c**t

  16. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Friendly reminder that violent crime has fallen every year since 1992 and is currently at an all time low. Violent crime in 2024 is down 12% vs 2022.

  17. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    i never got the point of multitools. it's one shitty small knife, a shitty saw, shitty scissor and a useless set of "screwdrivers" and then they add like 3 other useless smaller blades

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      As a kid they're really cool because it's like getting your own toolset.
      I'm pretty sure the target audience for Victorinox is dads getting it for their 8-12yo son as a birthday present or souvenir.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Yes, and it was awesome. I could not believe it when my parents gave me a decent-sized swiss army knife, at the age of 6. my dad taught me how to safely open and close it, and then I was off in the garden cutting things up and playing with all the tools. I never had any accidents, it was all just good stuff.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The irony of swiss army knives is that as a kid you obviously want the one with the most tools, but actually the ones with just the essentials are much nicer to hold and use than the thick bulky ones.
          I still use my 6-piece for everyday stuff (opening boxes etc.) One 6cm blade, 6cm serrated blade, wine screw, a weird hook/bottle opener, some type of spike and a screwdriver. Gets the job done 20+ years later.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Ever tried making tent pegs or poles with just a knife? It's a fricking nightmare and waste of time when all you have around is a springy prickly bushes, the saw works really well and fast for things like this. Ever got a tick? tweezers are there. Ever forgot to clip your toenails? scissors are there. Need to punch a hole in something to put a string on it? There is an app for that

      TL:DR you are a Black person without imagination who stays inside

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >knife
        >saw
        ok
        >tweezers
        just bring separate
        >forgot to clip your toenails
        :frog face:
        >punch a hole in something
        i dont even know what tool is suposed to do this just use a knife

        they are bloated with so much useless shit it's better to bring separate tools, especially if you already carry a knife. no pliers or wire cutters? but hey you got 3 different types of can openers
        the leatherman style ones with pliers have at least that but are heavy as frick and full of useless shit

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          There is nothing I find useless on a fieldmaster except the hook and even that was handy once. You starting to sound like one of those who bring car camping equipment for an overnighter because it's "heavy duty"

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >i never got the point of multitools.
      That's because you don't go PrepHole, or if you do you're a through-hiker.

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