place distraction carrots on sticks, seagal can't ignore a proper carrot.
alternatively sacrifice one custom 1911 a day to him and he will spend the next 24 hours explaining it to his camera crew
>Walks through entire doorway and checks left, then only checks right and up slowly for some reason, after walking 3 meters into the doorway where he should be dead.
You can't make this shit up.
>“At a party in my home in Miami in 1997, Van Damme was tired of Seagal claiming he could kick his ass so he offered Seagal outside into my back yard. Seagal made his excuses and left. But Van Damme, who was berserk, tracked him down at a nightclub and offered him out again.”
what's with the backwards baseball hat? it's not 1999 and you're not 15 years old.
christ almighty this guy is a fuckin trainwreck, especially when you compare him to other action stars of the same era/genre, like Stallone, Lundgren, and Van Damme.
Can he even go back to his country?
The story of this guy is really embarrassing and most of it could have been avoided but he needs to be a fucking asshole.
No joke, the legend is some big shot Hollywood movie director had a bet with a rich friend that he could make anyone look good on film and sell tons of tickets. The buddy took him up on his bet, I think it was like a million dollars or something. Anyways, the director told him to get the most boing blond uncharismatic person you can find and bring him to me. The other dude had dabbled in martial arts so he knew Seagal from the dojo, and knew he was full of himself and completely bland. So he brought him back to this guy who put him in movies.
No joke, the legend is some big shot Hollywood movie director had a bet with a rich friend that he could make anyone look good on film and sell tons of tickets. The buddy took him up on his bet, I think it was like a million dollars or something. Anyways, the director told him to get the most boing blond uncharismatic person you can find and bring him to me. The other dude had dabbled in martial arts so he knew Seagal from the dojo, and knew he was full of himself and completely bland. So he brought him back to this guy who put him in movies.
is, the truth is that Seagal had been working in the film industry since 1982 doing fight choreography. Above the Law was one of a dime a dozen low-budget action films being churned out in the 80s; it did decently well at the box office which led to him doing more low-budget action films that solidified him as an action lead. He only has 4 big budget films as a lead to his body of work (Under Siege 1 & 2, On Deadly Ground, and Glimmer Man).
Segal was also under the thumb of a Gambino Crime family connected producer by the name of Julius R. Nasso. He attempted to disassociate himself from Nasso in the late 90's. So Nasso had Gambino members threaten him into continuing to work with him because his movies were making good returns for the family.
The Kherson mud will probably slow him down, not to mention Russia's already broken logistics
place distraction carrots on sticks, seagal can't ignore a proper carrot.
alternatively sacrifice one custom 1911 a day to him and he will spend the next 24 hours explaining it to his camera crew
this is the real reason Putin is accelerating the Union State with Belarus, whoever controls the carrot controls Seagal
>eeeeh what's up brahs?
I think he's into the Russian boipussy now.
And I don't think he will be active for some time now
>Seagal
>boipucci
EVERYONE KNOWS THERES NOTHING TIGHTER THAN A VIETNAMESE SEX SLAVES SUBATOMIC SIZED SPHICTER.
https://www.loweringthebar.net/2010/04/plaintiff-alleges-she-was-steven-seagals-sex-slave.html
FUCKING AMATEURS. THE MAN HAS ADMITTED TO WORSE THAN YOU SMEAR HIM WITH. BRING OUT THE BIG GUNS OR GO FUCK YOURSELF
>The complaint alleges that Seagal chased Nguyen out of the house, “carrying a flashlight with a gun attached to it,”
wat
That is such a Seagal thing to do.
From one perspective, thats a reasonable take.
After all they're using the flashlight, not firing the gun.
the moment they start firing, it becomes a gun with a flashlight attached.
If you never use it or except for internet, messages and the camera, is a smartphone still a telephone, after all?
stairs?
Criminally underrated
I can hear the breathing on this muted video
>the plate carrier is empty
hahahahaha
>Walks through entire doorway and checks left, then only checks right and up slowly for some reason, after walking 3 meters into the doorway where he should be dead.
You can't make this shit up.
Les muscles from Bruxelles
>“At a party in my home in Miami in 1997, Van Damme was tired of Seagal claiming he could kick his ass so he offered Seagal outside into my back yard. Seagal made his excuses and left. But Van Damme, who was berserk, tracked him down at a nightclub and offered him out again.”
Based Seagel not beating Van Dammes ass
Van Damme would kick is ass sooo ard
>Tactical twinkies in the opposite direction
His need to hide his giant bloat stomach ruins his combat effectiveness.
Get the garden gnomes in Hollywood to offer him a movie deal
Can garden gnomes defeat this hypergarden gnome? I’m not so sure. Look at his imposing build. He could be king of the garden gnomes
what's with the backwards baseball hat? it's not 1999 and you're not 15 years old.
christ almighty this guy is a fuckin trainwreck, especially when you compare him to other action stars of the same era/genre, like Stallone, Lundgren, and Van Damme.
Maybe his hairline is going Copelord?
most likely
can people old enough to post trash like this please fuck off and die
Nope
>t. been on 4chins since 2005
2006 fag here
No 😀
No. But some day, you too will be an oldfag.
Don't listen to this guy anon, you can always an hero yourself.
You do know how right?
Can he even go back to his country?
The story of this guy is really embarrassing and most of it could have been avoided but he needs to be a fucking asshole.
Fat fake fuck and his fake martial art
Ukraine wouldn't stand a chance if Steven seagl joined the fight, that man is superhuman!
Stairs.
Not since Russian artillery destroyed every flight of stairs.
insulin
A salad
I wish this Hollywood garden gnome goes on the frontlines and gets gooded.
Can Russian supply lines even support such a unit?
Supreme Leader Dennis Rodman can defeat him.
>weapons that can counter Steven Seagl
An empty buffet
I cant believe anybody ever thought this stupid fat fuck was cool. Why was he in so many movies? Which of you stupid assholes is watching them?
>Why was he in so many movies?
No joke, the legend is some big shot Hollywood movie director had a bet with a rich friend that he could make anyone look good on film and sell tons of tickets. The buddy took him up on his bet, I think it was like a million dollars or something. Anyways, the director told him to get the most boing blond uncharismatic person you can find and bring him to me. The other dude had dabbled in martial arts so he knew Seagal from the dojo, and knew he was full of himself and completely bland. So he brought him back to this guy who put him in movies.
As entertaining as the rumor recounted by
is, the truth is that Seagal had been working in the film industry since 1982 doing fight choreography. Above the Law was one of a dime a dozen low-budget action films being churned out in the 80s; it did decently well at the box office which led to him doing more low-budget action films that solidified him as an action lead. He only has 4 big budget films as a lead to his body of work (Under Siege 1 & 2, On Deadly Ground, and Glimmer Man).
Segal was also under the thumb of a Gambino Crime family connected producer by the name of Julius R. Nasso. He attempted to disassociate himself from Nasso in the late 90's. So Nasso had Gambino members threaten him into continuing to work with him because his movies were making good returns for the family.
big if true
I'm pretty sure they've mastered the art of walking briskly.
Russia doesn't have the proper logistics to supply him with enough food, there's no way they could deploy him effectively